Author Topic: Chrysostom on finding a wife... (Read 33314 times)

Gray2023 · « **Reply #145 on:** February 18, 2026, 11:13:58 AM »

Quote from: Änσnymσus on February 17, 2026, 02:51:19 PM

I do not know how you could even consider it a possibility that I was using the humility of Our Blessed Mother to justify calling someone a quasi-ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ. I did not give any such indication.

I was merely making the point that between oneself and God, acknowledging the virtues one possesses as His gift is not pride. Of course, it is not humble to speak about one's virtues, especially in public. However, St. Francis de Sales teaches that in order to maintain one's reputation in a serious matter such as being unjustly accused of a grave sin, one may defend one's own intentions and explain their actions, and this can rightly be done by expressing that one was using a just anger in their speech.

That is not pride either, unless the anger was not just. It would be good for you to remember that the way men express things is quite different from women, and what may appear harsh or unjust to us (due to our giftedness when it comes to nurturing and compassion), it is not necessarily objectively harsh. I am not making a judgement on this particular thread, I am just sharing some concepts to keep in mind when you wish to properly interpret what men say. There are many things in Scripture that sound almost scandalizing to read if we women give in to irrational sensitivity, but it is the Word of God. For example: "Every woman that is a harlot, shall be trodden upon as dung in the way." (Ecclesiasticus 9:10)

You also did not give any context to why you were posting. Sometimes things just do not stand on their own.

A mother is very protective of her children. The comment was not directed to my children but it was directed at someone's child. A man who is not here to defend himself. When we talk about some one to point out faults we think they have, it is gossip, I think particularly detraction.

This is the post in question

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Re: Chrysostom on finding a wife...
« Reply #97 on: February 15, 2026, 12:02:55 PM »

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Quote from: Änσnymσus on February 14, 2026, 10:53:18 PM
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I have great empathy for single traditional Catholic men. My son is single at 36 and has not found a decent young lady to even consider. He accepts his lot as the will of God with hopes of finding a wife at some point. But it it were my son posting these rash, judgemental statements about traditional Catholic women, It would disturb me.

He almost certainly does think these things.

Or else is he is probably quasi ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ.

I am sorry if I misunderstood you, but I just wanted to set the record straight.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #146 on:** February 18, 2026, 11:28:27 AM »

Quote from: Gray2023 on February 18, 2026, 11:13:58 AM

You also did not give any context to why you were posting. Sometimes things just do not stand on their own.

A mother is very protective of her children. The comment was not directed to my children but it was directed at someone's child. A man who is not here to defend himself. When we talk about some one to point out faults we think they have, it is gossip, I think particularly detraction.

This is the post in question

He almost certainly does think these things.

Or else is he is probably quasi ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ.

I am sorry if I misunderstood you, but I just wanted to set the record straight.

Thank you for providing the previous comments (I did read it) and yes, I understand mothers are protective, but mothers often let this nurturing nature blind them. I could have given further context, but to me it was quite evident that all I wanted to share was something written by a saint. With a little bit of thinking it seems to me easy to understand the point I was making, I suppose I assume people think deeper than what happens in reality. In my observations, traditional catholics are always ready for a fight, to defend themselves, and assume that when someone comments on their post, that it is in opposition to them automatically. Not every conversation is a battle, and one does not need to be on edge like that all the time; it's not healthy. It is important to read things for what they are, not what you are looking for or expecting.

I also believe you don't realize that the man who made the quasi ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ remark was not falsely accusing someone else's adult child of anything, he was merely making the point that if a man were to think certain things, he would be a quasi ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ, which is a term to express a certain level of effeminacy. This is not detraction. The man who made the long post was essentially stating that your lack of ability to understand what people (especially men) mean to convey gets you into trouble, because you begin attacking a non existent fault in the other person.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #147 on:** **Yesterday** at 08:13:18 PM »

A heatmap study done in 2012 found that men tend to look more at the chest, face and crotch areas (on both men and women) while women tend to look more at the face followed by the torso. So lads, don't be fooled when a women says looks don't matter as much to women. The data says otherwise.

Godefroy · « **Reply #148 on:** **Today** at 11:08:31 AM »

Quote from: Änσnymσus on Yesterday at 08:13:18 PM

A heatmap study done in 2012 found that men tend to look more at the chest, face and crotch areas (on both men and women) while women tend to look more at the face followed by the torso. So lads, don't be fooled when a women says looks don't matter as much to women. The data says otherwise.

Asking women for advice on how to catch a woman, is like asking a fish for advice on how to fish. You need to ask a fisherman.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #149 on:** **Today** at 11:20:38 AM »

I live in an area of the Midwest where I have the option of several TLM masses(SSPX, FSSP, Indult) and having been to each
multiple times I can say there ARE NO single traditional Catholic women between 25 and 50 years old.
I have also been on a couple "Catholic" dating apps and the majority of women over 35 have been divorced.
They apparently see no issue with it either.
In order for a fisherman to catch fish there first has to be fish in the pond, river, lake or ocean.
Now I'm waiting for how soon some woman on here will post that their church is overflowing with lovely single classy Catholic
women.