Author Topic: Being forced to go a modernist university (Read 8561 times)

Pax Vobis · « **Reply #50 on:** October 15, 2019, 02:08:06 PM »

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The thing is, this is sort of a last resort meant to buy me time to think things through. I feel like my life is too "planned" at times.

Well, if you trade college life for a 40 hour a week job (minimum wage or even higher) you will have LESS time to think/pray about the issue, not more. You'll never have more free time/energy than in your college days. Further, if you think that college life feels "planned" wait till you work 40 hours a week and your only free time is a few hours a day and then weekends.
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A lot of this depends on how you're paying for college. I can't advise you to continue college if you're getting into major debt. I would say go to a vocational/trade school rather than load up on student loans, which you can never get away from. However, if you have some sort of scholarship or your parents are helping you with tuition, then college might be advisable.
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Here's some advice from a fellow melancholic. You can't "figure out" your life, no matter how much time you think about it. You're probably prone to "analysis paralysis" and this never works. You need to just worry about the next 6 months to a year. You're too young to try to figure out your vocation now (unless you are absolutely sure and you have a clear option). But you have no options at the moment. Quitting college isn't an option that has any good outcomes.
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Since the semester is still going on, apply yourself to your studies 1,000%. Give it all you got. Take your free time and say some extra rosaries. Spend time having fun and exploring hobbies that interest you. Hang out with decent friends (there's still plenty of decent people out there...most of them are "nerds" but that's a good thing. It means they aren't "popular" and aren't obsessed with superficial wastes of time). Many times God speaks to us when we're busy doing things. Over analyzing never solves anything. Make the best decision based on the info you have on hand, be bold, and go forward! God will not let you go off the path He has for you, when you have a pure intention. Many times we find what we're looking for when we trust in Him and just go with our gut.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #51 on:** October 15, 2019, 03:04:23 PM »

Quote from: Anonymous on October 15, 2019, 11:26:39 AM

I've been adjusting to university over time, and I think the situation has improved. I'm making good friends with other Catholics on campus, as I mentioned. I still feel trapped, but still have not given into despair. God will get me out of this. I see two potential options in the future in regards to dropping out:

1) Wait until the end of the semester (early December), talk to my parents yet again and explain that I've given this a try, but that this isn't for me at this time. Promise to get a job and to pay for most of my expenses. State that this is an important part of being an adult that I have not experienced yet, and that I want this level of independence. (I turned 19 yesterday, so I'm really feeling the need for more agency in my life).

2) During my break, secure a minimum wage job and move into an apartment in another town. Then, I will make the phone call to drop out. I see this as a defensive maneuver, as I feel my parents might physically abuse me if I drop out under their roof. I'll probably need one or several roommates for this, seeing as my area has a high cost of living.

But again, perhaps God will allow me to stick out much longer under my current condition to bring about a greater good. Any advice here would be very much appreciated. Thanks again for all your prayers.

You needn't have a university degree in order to make a decent living. One of my three sons has a university degree, and he has a very good income as an accountant. But my other two sons have good jobs, and they don't have any degrees at all. They were nerdy homeschoolers, so of course they chose careers that are a little nerdy and off-beat. One of them works with stained glass - mostly repairing old stained glass windows. He makes about $27.00 a hour. He loves it. The other son who didn't go to college works in a computer-based job, in which he formats comic books for online use, such as cell phones. It pays about $25.00 an hour. He was offered the job after a six-month apprenticeship, in which he worked for free; but that's still cheaper than college.
I'm sorry to see that you are worried that your parents might be physically abusive if you drop out of school under their roof. Is there another family member somewhere with whom you can live, if you do drop out?

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #52 on:** October 22, 2019, 05:50:30 PM »

As long as someone else is paying the room/board and tuition, go to this secular university and make the most of it.

Get a good degree and see what happens afterwards.

Look for a Traditionalist chapel near the university and go there for Mass and Adoration.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #53 on:** October 27, 2019, 06:45:23 PM »

OP here. Things have calmed down and gotten better with school in general. I think that I may have a religious vocation. I feel genuinely drawn to it. I want to be devoted entirely to Our Lord, and I think that He is calling me. I could be wrong in this discernment. However, if it’s correct, than what good is it (practically) to waste 4 years of my life and my parents’ money at this rotten institution? I’m thinking about withdrawing after the end of this semester, which is soon approaching.

At this point, I don’t really care what my parents will say or do about this. I would still be living with them in this scenario, but would get a job to start paying for my own stuff, and would even offer to help pay off the loans. I feel the need to stand up for myself. I don’t know if this is of God or not. Any advice would be appreciated, as always.

Änσnymσus · « **Reply #54 on:** October 27, 2019, 08:20:01 PM »

Absolutely do not withdraw unless you have a clear plan to enter seminary right after, if following a religious vocation is your intention. Quitting college to go work as a cashier while you "work things out" is a recipe for disaster.

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Author Topic: Being forced to go a modernist university (Read 8561 times)

Pax Vobis

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