It's 'a child, not a goldfish': New dad-to-be is livid as wife pulls power play over baby's name
By Maureen Mackey
Published October 14, 2023
Fox News
Video
A couple about to have their first child together are fighting over what to name their baby, and 3,000 people as of Saturday morning have chimed in with comments about it. Another 5,000-plus gave a reaction.
A man who described himself as 25 years old shared in a social media post that he and his wife, who is 23, are "having our first child together."
"She is currently 9 months pregnant and could give birth [at] any time," he wrote.
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"The only major fight we have had throughout her pregnancy happened a couple of days ago, and it was about what we were going to name our kid," he wrote on Reddit's AITA page ("Am I the a--hole?").
"It all started when we found out the gender of the baby. We didn’t do a gender reveal and decided to find out the gender at one of her checkups because we didn’t want to spend time making two lists of names, then have to get rid of one after.

"After we found out we were having a boy, we sat down together and made a list," a husband and father-to-be shared with others. He then revealed what happened that has caused a rift in the marriage.  (iStock)
"After we found out we were having a boy, we sat down together and made a list. Almost all of the names she suggested were normal, until the one that caused me to write this post," he added.
"She suggested we name our son Mune. She told me the name was from this movie she watched when she was younger and that it always stuck with her.
"I told her the name was a little out there and he [the new baby] would get made fun of for it."She claimed he wouldn’t and we started going back and forth trying to decide whether to add the name to the list or not. Eventually she agreed to keep the name off the list, we picked some that we liked — and I thought that was that."
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The man, who goes by the username Public-Praline-3691, added, "Later on in her pregnancy, her mom decided to throw a baby shower, as it was her first grandchild, and my wife's pregnancy was almost over and we hadn't celebrated once."

The new father-to-be wrote that he "had family members come up to me and ask me about the name and why I hadn't told them." (iStock)
He said the party "was fine for the most part until we started to open the gifts. Most of them were normal baby things like diapers and bottles, until we got to her mom's gift.
"My wife opened the gift bag and pulled out a blue handmade blanket. It seemed normal enough at first until my wife unfolded it, and [lo] and behold, there was the name Mune written on the blanket."
The father-to-be added, "When I saw it, I was p---ed but didn’t want to cause a scene, so I stayed quiet."
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He said "after that reveal, I had family members come up to me and ask me about the name and why I hadn't told them."
He added in his post that he "didn't know what to tell them, as I didn't have a clue about this either and just had to embarrassingly tell my family that — which p---ed me off even more."
The man went on to share that "once the event ended and me and my wife went home, I started to question her about the name."

A man said his wife, a mom-to-be, "left" after their argument "and told me she wouldn’t be coming back for a while." (iStock)
"She got defensive and told me that it was a good name and that I was overreacting about it," he added. "I brought up the earlier points and told her it was a stupid name for a kid and if she wanted to name something Mune so bad, she could use the name for a dog.
"She got upset and called her mom to come get her. After she left she called me and told me she wouldn’t be coming back for a while.
"Everyone I've talked to about this has said I'm not the a--hole, but now that my wife has been gone and I've been thinking about it, I feel like I could have handled the situation better."
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He asked if he was in the wrong.
Fox News Digital reached out to a psychologist for insight into the scenario as people on the platform shared their views.Among the top "upvoted" comments was this piece of advice: "You do not name a child something your partner does not agree with. You find a compromise. This is the start of many necessary compromises in life, and it is a total [a--hole] move to unilaterally decide on a child's name despite your partner's misgivings.
"You need to put your foot down HARD on this because what she is doing is 100% not OK. She is absolutely not mature enough for motherhood if she cannot find a reasonable compromise on this."
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This commenter, who said she's the mother of "several kids," also wrote, "The only thing a name like Mune is good for is if your kid ends up the drummer in a metal band."
Another responder chimed in with, "This is a child, not a goldfish. There are consequences and repercussions to choosing a name that is very unusual to begin with ... To go behind the other parent's back and tell a grandparent what the name is going to be — that is unacceptable."
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Someone else put it this way: Rather than worrying "about the name, I would be worried that your wife is deceitful and manipulative."
Another commenter wrote, in part, "What I would do if I [were] you is offer to let it be the middle name or — if she wants to call the child [by that] nickname, then that's on her. But you have to find a middle ground."
Still another said, "Both parents need to make this decision. She needs to realize it's not about what she wants. It's about what you both want."

What is wrong with these 'men'?

I suspect he wasn't completely surprised by this. That sort of behavior wouldn't be an isolated incident.

"Doesn't matter what he wants, I'll just get upset, throw a fit, and get what I want in the end."

Completely childish and he shouldn't have agreed to marry someone that immature.

I don't mind being the a--hole.  Sometimes you have to be.  Doesn't bother me a bit.

It seems that in recent years, even among Newchurchers, there has been this Strangelovian-like impulse for parents to name their children anything, anything but a saint's name or a name from the Bible.

If you must, must give your child some trendy, euphonic secular name, at the very least, give him or her a saint's name as a middle name, and baptize using that name.

Or you could choose some obscure saint name such as Cloud.

Can you elaborate?  It really seems like she's the one in the wrong here.

That's what I was thinking.

Besides being weak, having poor choice of spouse, etc.

The man should have been more firm in these matters from the getgo. The fact that he had to go to reddit for advice tells me this. Sure seeking counsel is wise but it also reflects the current lack of authority and 'guts' this man has over his spouse. A child's name is a serious matter, this sort of behaviour from the women and co is simply unacceptable.

Thank you for the elaboration.  I mostly agree, but these days if a man tries to be "too firm" he is automatically labeled an abuser and emasculated, at least in a secular relationship, which is what it sounds like this is.  Granted, that's not always the case, and naturally if the man is firm and the woman is actually behaving like a woman and not a child then the firmness works.

Even if he was more firm, these days of, "muh feminalism, muh rights, muh oppression, muh body muh baby" etc. she probably still would have went behind his back if she was willing to do so when they already agreed not to use the name in a compromise and likely he would have been blackballed for raising a justified fuss about it.  I completely agree going to reddit for advice was pretty low and yes names are a very serious matter.  

This is what Fox thinks is news. Finding a post on Reddit and "reporting" it.