Meg,
You say above that the NO is often sacrilegious and of doubtful validity. If you believe that it's doubtful, then it's also not set in stone that it's absolutely is invalid. And maybe there are times when it's not sacrilegious, but just a dumbed-down bare bones version of the Mass. If there's even a chance that it's valid and licit, then I'm not going to stay home on Sunday. It's fine of others do (stay at home), but I'm not comfortable with that. I don't know if graces flow from the NO. Part of the graces present also depend on the faith and devotion of those present at the Mass, which is also lacking of course at the NO. I don't go to receive graces from the NO. I only go because I can't bear to offend God, and I also go to show love and devotion towards Him (in Holy Eucharist), even if others there do not. I understand if others here strongly disagree.
Meg,
There are a few misunderstandings in your statement.
The Novus Ordo is sacrilegious in and of itself, and it is therefore always a sacrilege. There are no times when it is not.
You say, "if there is even a chance etc", well that is not our choice to make. The Church says that one is never allowed to approach a sacrament which is doubtful.
Not being able to attend a Catholic Mass on Sunday, or any other day, for that matter, is indeed a tragedy and a great suffering, but if you cannot fulfill your Sunday duty at a Catholic Mass, then you are dispensed, but must make your day Holy and dedicated to God.
It is the Church which requires you to attend Mass, in that command is contained the Church's responsibility to provide you with that Mass. In this Crisis of conciliar usurpation, the Church is being prevented from doing this, so we are left to attending when we can, and where we can, and how often we can.
Refusing non-Catholic worship and making the day Holy and sacred is indeed honoring and obeying God. He can never be offended by these acts, and he gives great grace to those who persevere in fidelity to Him.
It does not matter how we feel about it, it only matters that we do what is right in God's eyes, and we know what is right according to the laws and doctrine of the Church. One may not be as culpable when they do not understand the nature of the Novus Ordo ritual, but once you have knowledge, then you are responsible for the offenses which this sacrilege and non-Catholic worship carries with it.
The good and the Faithful are suffering in these times, in their deprivations, but, that is the mark of fidelity to Christ and His Church, never to accept that which is not of God, and not of His Church.