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I'm in north Idaho and it's pretty much dark at 5:00. It used to be 4:30, but it is getting later to about 5. The other problem for me is that I'm 6'6" tall with a high inseem and size 15 or 16 feet. Finding warm enough winter clothes large enough to fit me is not an easy or affordable task. I was looking for a warm suit to do ice fishing and the cost of that threw me off.

Oh. No.  That’s really difficult to find clothing and shoes.   

Bataar, I will pray for you. I too struggle with loneliness.

You said above that God doesn’t need you… this is true. He doesn’t need any of us. Yet, He made us.

The most mind bending thing to realize is that He wants us and LOVES us.

The Creator of Heaven and Earth loves us and wants us to be with Him face to face… and all this in spite of our iniquities. It is truly a wonderful gift to be alive even though I know how hard this is for you. I love my solitude but I also love spending time with people. Yet if I’m honest with myself some nights I begin to ponder on the majority of people that were subjected to in this post V2 world of ours and I realize that God, Our Mother, and all the angels and Saints are our true family and friends. And unlike the world they are eager to talk to us and spend time with us.

One thing I did the other day that I’ll probably do again soon because it was fun and I desperately wanted to get out of my house for all the reasons you’ve mentioned is I went to a store without the intention to buy anything and pretended to shop until a sales person came up to me and asked if they could help me. I engaged them(which I never do. I hate when sales people do this) and let me tell you I bs’d the first 15-20 minutes looking at the stuff on sale and then shifted the conversation onto the sales person and just talked to them like a friend. Spent 2.5 hours just talking to the guy until he was done with his shift. We closed the store down. Lol. I left the store having spent zero dollars and just enjoyed talking to somebody, a total stranger, for a couple hours and I dang near consider him a friend now. 😆 He had autism, btw, I learned a lot about him. Lol. 

Again, I will pray for you, man. You’re certainly not alone in the battle against loneliness. 

May God and Our Lady bless you!

Bataar, first and foremost, you're a CATHOLIC, are you not?

In all charity, please, try this: drop the autism angle already. You've allowed it to become a case of the tail-wagging-the-dog.

Maybe the diagnosis is useful for specific methods in the education of children, for vocational counseling that maybe someone should work in a back office and not as a salesperson, etc. etc. But when autism becomes a person's self-declared identity, it's a very dangerous thing.

What did people do in all the centuries before some modernist (probably atheist) "professionals" came up with the definition and started categorizing more and more children and adults this way? (Consider that there are lots of parallels between the academics who argue in favor of "neurodiversity" and those who argue in favor of "gender diversity", but that's another topic.) The label becomes a crutch that's more crippling than helpful.

You speak of your brain as if it's somehow separate from you and is what determines your daily beliefs and behavior. No, your brain is just an organ inside your skull. What is you is your SOUL. What determines your thoughts and behavior is your WILL.

Plenty people in this thread have given you advice about how to stay busy during the day. That's about using your WILL to put some of those pointers into practice. Have you changed your habits at all? Have you sincerely asked God to help you change your habits? No need to reply, these are questions for you to consider honestly with yourself.

Plenty of people in this thread have given you spiritual advice about how to ensure that you're putting Our Lord first in your priorities, and how to look to Him for guidance and fortitude. You are the only one who can quietly and humbly reflect on the state of your soul. Others can't do it for you. Look through CathInfo in The Sacred, The Library, etc. Do a web search on a traditional Examen of Conscience, print it out, put it in your pocket, and go over it daily. DECIDE that your "special interests" include what's most necessary in your inner life.

I merely state the autism fact to give people insight into how my brain works and how I think, which is quite different. I can't think of anything to do outside of my house, by myself. One of my problems, that I haven't figured out how to work around is that I'm really, really good in seeing the negative side of things. Someone can suggest something and instantly, I can think of a dozen reasons why the suggestion won't work. I need to be able to do activities around things I find interesting. Yes, I find God and the faith interesting, but there's no way to meet people doing that. I can go make a holy hour at my church and if, while I'm there praying, someone else comes in, I can't exactly go start talking to them in the church. I don't view the church as a valid way to meet people as there are no social activities at churches that foster meeting people. People have suggested I try to start my own group. I have and it didn't go anywhere. I suppose I can continuously email and email and email the priest/pastor repeatedly, but I'm just not that kind of person. After reaching out a few times and getting no response, I dropped the idea. If the church isn't an option, where does one meet other single (men and women) Catholics?