I mean this in the nicest way possible, but you probably don’t have kids? It is so hard to understand all the expenses until you’re in the thick of it. I used to have the same mentality, and reality hit hard about year 2 with only 2 children.
They are in fact very pricey.
Even if doing all you describe- the cloth diapers, not buying unnecessary gadgets, thrifting, cheap but affordable food, being overall smart with their money, etc. They are still expensive.
I do agree very much with you that God will give you the grace to make it in these times, but as Matthew said, we need to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.
If a woman is going to marry a man making $15/hr (give or take, but I figure that might be the average Starbucks wage)she should be ready to contribute income to help care for the kids because that is just the reality of it. Even if they are doing EVERYTHING to be frugal. Unless of course they have parents helping them, or other helps that most people don’t have starting out.
As Mike Tyson famously said, "everyone has a plan until they get hit."
As you get older (and wiser), you realize that EVERYTHING seems simple -- in theory. When it's all conceptual and hypothetical, everything seems so easy. But when you try to APPLY IT to real life with real human beings...that's where the problems start.
I agree. I was going to talk about homeschooling, and how I experienced the same thing. You start out idealistic, but then you realize there are expenses you didn't plan on. I thought homeschooling would be much cheaper that it actually is. Turns out, my wife can't 1-on-1 teach all 9 of our children. (We don't have any twins; not even any "Irish twins". They are all different ages) She has other things she has to do. Things to research, fill out, register for, help kids with, accounting, taxes, planning, helping run the household, etc. She has a full list. I've seen it. I often looked at her list with a critical eye, (like many twentysomething guys on here might do!) thinking it needs to be trimmed down. But to my surprise, it was all stuff that needed to be done. I learned something. I was ignorant, and learned something new.
Likewise, I often look at our expenses with a critical eye, thinking "Come on! We have a paid off house, no car payments, no debt. How can we possibly be spending that much per month!" and I don't see anything that we could cut. Homeschooling is a big one. There are a lot of expenses you don't think about, like mandatory liability car insurance for your kids as they get a drivers license. Do you want your 16 year old girls to go get jobs, and get hit on by a bunch of undesirable men? We don't. So we take the hit and pay for it. Our son paid for his own insurance when he was 16, because he had a job. Boys are different. Meanwhile I don't think it's desirable to raise daughters who can't drive (physically or legally) at 18. Women need to be able to drive. What if their child needs to go to the doctor? What if they need something for the household? Isn't the husband usually at work?
I know Trad families IRL where child(ren) can't drive, physically and/or legally, well into adulthood. Even into their 40's! It's insane.
Those who have 0 kids are always the experts on child-raising. They don't even know what they don't know.
Topic: Advice on immodest adult daughter (Read 1993 times)