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Author Topic: Inaudible or No Absolution  (Read 9068 times)

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Änσnymσus

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Inaudible or No Absolution
« on: March 08, 2024, 04:26:16 PM »
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    • I'm looking for some advice from valid not heretical priests or anyone who cares and is goodwilled:

    Hello Father,     

    Sometimes when I go to confession it seems that the priest does not give absolution.  But he does not say he is not giving absolution.  It is very disappointing to me.  I travel a long way, and humiliate myself and the priest does not even raise his hand in absolution (indulgentium, deinde ego te absolvo, of course no passio domine nostri either as is to be done apart from extraordinary circuмstances), but merely says "go in peace".  Should I question the priest when he does that? 

    I know priests can withhold absolution, and do not have to tell the person they are withholding in rare cases, but it is a disappointing feeling to travel all that way not to hear the consoling words of absolution after humiliating myself with a sincere Confession.  Perhaps because I confess grievous sins matter-of-factly and it gives the impression that I am not sincere.  And telling me you are not absolving me may scandalize me.  There was no inaudible mumbling of words as I made my contrition, just silence.  I was glad, because I thought that after my act of contrition, I would get to hear the words of absolution like I do with some good priests.   

    I would not have wasted the trip if I was not truly sorry and had a true purpose of amendment. 

    I mention this to you because you are the priest that did this to me and will send me scattering to the SSPX. 

    Do you have any advice? 





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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #1 on: March 08, 2024, 04:35:19 PM »
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    • Quote from: Änσnymσus on March 08, 2024, 04:26:16 PM

    I'm looking for some advice from valid not heretical priests or anyone who cares and is goodwilled:

    Hello Father,


    Sometimes when I go to confession it seems that the priest does not give absolution.  But he does not say he is not giving absolution.  It is very disappointing to me.  I travel a long way, and humiliate myself and the priest does not even raise his hand in absolution (indulgentium, deinde ego te absolvo, of course no passio domine nostri either as is to be done apart from extraordinary circuмstances), but merely says "go in peace".  Should I question the priest when he does that?

    I know priests can withhold absolution, and do not have to tell the person they are withholding in rare cases, but it is a disappointing feeling to travel all that way not to hear the consoling words of absolution after humiliating myself with a sincere Confession.  Perhaps because I confess grievous sins matter-of-factly and it gives the impression that I am not sincere.  And telling me you are not absolving me may scandalize me.  There was no inaudible mumbling of words as I made my contrition, just silence.  I was glad, because I thought that after my act of contrition, I would get to hear the words of absolution like I do with some good priests. 

    I would not have wasted the trip if I was not truly sorry and had a true purpose of amendment.

    I mention this to you because you are the priest that did this to me and will send me scattering to the SSPX.

    Do you have any advice?

    Not a priest but the form that is important is the term 'absolvo', technically he could say absolvis or absola and it would still be valid though a sin for him.

    Not sure about english or other languages.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #2 on: March 08, 2024, 04:36:54 PM »
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    • Quote from: Änσnymσus on March 08, 2024, 04:35:19 PM
    Not a priest but the form that is important is the term 'absolvo', technically he could say absolvis or absola and it would still be valid though a sin for him.

    Not sure about english or other languages.
    Also he might just be saying it silently though I'm not sure if it needs to be audible.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #3 on: March 08, 2024, 04:38:15 PM »
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    • Actually I could see him and he did not move his lips.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #4 on: March 08, 2024, 05:29:24 PM »
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    • It sounds like you're doing Novus Ordo confession in a reconciliation room.  Is this the case?
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    Online SimpleMan

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #5 on: March 08, 2024, 10:06:25 PM »
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    • I'm pretty confident that if the priest were going to refuse you absolution, he would tell you so, and not just remain silent.

    I wouldn't worry about it.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #6 on: March 09, 2024, 01:32:30 AM »
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    • Most SSPX Priests pronounce the words of absolution in a low voice  while you are saying your act of contrition. It can be really difficult to hear. If you’re going to a traditional Priest I’d just trust that the absolution is being given properly. 
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    Offline CatholicChris

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #7 on: March 09, 2024, 03:22:08 AM »
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    • Quote from: SimpleMan on March 08, 2024, 10:06:25 PM
    I'm pretty confident that if the priest were going to refuse you absolution, he would tell you so, and not just remain silent.

    I wouldn't worry about it.


    I second this, it seems very hard to believe that a priest would refuse absolution without letting you know and telling you why. If absolution is refused, it is so you can correct the problem and come back, which you can't do if you aren't informed anything.
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    Offline Stubborn

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #8 on: March 09, 2024, 05:30:11 AM »
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    I second this, it seems very hard to believe that a priest would refuse absolution without letting you know and telling you why. If absolution is refused, it is so you can correct the problem and come back, which you can't do if you aren't informed anything.
    I third this. Did he assign you your penance? If not, don't go that priest ever again.

    Where on earth did the OP ever get the idea that "priests can withhold absolution, and do not have to tell the person they are withholding in rare cases?" This idea is altogether wrong, I would say that idea is completely "anti-sacrament of penance."

    He's not sitting there for his health, he is sitting there for your spiritual health and certainly will tell you why he will not absolve you if that's the case, but no way will he ever just not absolve you without saying anything.



     
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    Online Ladislaus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #9 on: March 09, 2024, 07:26:35 AM »
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    • If OP could see his lips, then it's likely a Novus Ordo reconciliation.  There are some who don't believe in "absolution" and that the Sacrament is nothing more than about the psychological benefit you receive from confessing your sins.
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    Offline Mithrandylan

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #10 on: March 09, 2024, 08:26:02 AM »
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    • If the priest doesn't *SAY* "I absolve you..." there's no absolution. He can say it quietly, even whisper it, but it cannot be truly inaudible-- because then it isn't said. 

    This is setting aside the question of NO orders. 
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    Online SimpleMan

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #11 on: March 09, 2024, 01:27:20 PM »
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    • Quote from: Mithrandylan on March 09, 2024, 08:26:02 AM
    If the priest doesn't *SAY* "I absolve you..." there's no absolution. He can say it quietly, even whisper it, but it cannot be truly inaudible-- because then it isn't said.

    This is setting aside the question of NO orders.
     
    Some people speak very soft and low.  Think of the “low talker” on Seinfeld.  I once had a job interview where the interviewer was like that. I could not understand her.

    While some episodes of Seinfeld deal with unchastity, it is really, when you think about it, kind of a minstrel show lampooning secular, selfish New York Jєωs and Jєωιѕн-adjacent people (with which NYC abounds).  Nobody admires these characters.  They are not presented in a positive light.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #12 on: March 09, 2024, 03:39:50 PM »
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    • Thank you for the responses.  They can deny absolution without telling you.  And there can be legitimate reasons to do so, I think I read this in the Raccolta or some official work.  If you are willing to accept the fact you could actually be wrong on something you have obviously not studied then do the research, otherwise think as you will.  

    It wasn't a novus ordo setting.  He had his back to me but he was turned in a such a way so I would see him and if he chooses, he could look at me.  You would have to be there to get a full sense of it.  But I could see his face (the side of it).  

    He gave no penance, and just said go in peace.  But this after very good counseling.  My impression is that he is a very good priest.  

    Does anyone get the full formula, the passio domini nostri Jesu Christi et Maria etc. at the end?

    They should give the full formula at all times, and it is an audible sacrament.  Most of them mumble and then say the ego te absolvo out loud and the rest low again.  In my experience.  But more and more I don't hear anything.  It depends on the type of sins I confess.  I figure people will doubt the veracity of what I say, but I put it out there anyway.  

    My personal belief, preference, if there are no long lines or anything (and even if there is) is that they should wait until you finish your Act of Contrition before the give the absolution.  It is impolite to interrupt even in the Confessional :) It is two ways.  They need to ascertain to the degree possible if the penitent elicits a true sorrow.  It is tempting to just stop saying the act of contrition if they interrupt.  Then say it after they have finished giving the absolution.  And if they ask why you stopped, say "I just didn't want to interrupt you, Father.  And I like to make sure I am getting or like to hear the absolution."  The truth never hurts.  
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    Offline ByzCat3000

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #13 on: March 09, 2024, 04:39:43 PM »
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    • I’ve read guide to confessors so I’m aware of the fact that priests can sometimes deny absolution but I’ve never heard of a priest being able to not even tell the penitent they are doing that.  When would that be allowed or right and what’s the source?
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    Offline CatholicChris

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    Re: Inaudible or No Absolution
    « Reply #14 on: March 09, 2024, 04:46:17 PM »
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    • Quote from: Änσnymσus on March 09, 2024, 03:39:50 PM
    Thank you for the responses.  They can deny absolution without telling you.  And there can be legitimate reasons to do so, I think I read this in the Raccolta or some official work.  If you are willing to accept the fact you could actually be wrong on something you have obviously not studied then do the research, otherwise think as you will. 

    What would be a legitimate reason to deny absolution without telling you?  If you were not absolved, you'd need to confess those sins again in your next confession.  As for not receiving penance, that isn't even technically necessary. A lot of Byzantine Rite Catholic priests don't even prescribe a penance.
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