Catholic Info

Traditional Catholic Faith => The Sacred: Catholic Liturgy, Chant, Prayers => Topic started by: Matto on August 23, 2019, 02:36:12 PM

Title: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 23, 2019, 02:36:12 PM
I am having troubles with the devil. He is tricking me. He tempts me and when he does I do not know right from wrong and sometimes I do bad things while thinking they are not bad. So I do not know what I am doing when this happens. It is not that I want to do bad and do it. It is that he tricks me into thinking objectively bad actions are good and I do them, not knowing right from wrong. Or perhaps I am imagining things. I do not know the level of sin when this happens. Please pray that I do better.

That's enough about me, now for us. Please pray for all of us in the New York City area. We need your prayers. It is hard being a Catholic in New York City. But we have family here and friends to convert.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Stubborn on August 23, 2019, 02:46:10 PM
 :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: 2Vermont on August 23, 2019, 02:53:47 PM
Matto, I would start with checking with your doctor about those "prescription drugs" you told us you were taking.  I'm concerned.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: SeanJohnson on August 23, 2019, 03:04:36 PM
Matto-

How long before you changed your avatar did you start taking these prescription drugs?

I ask, because that is about the time we all noticed a dramatic change in the nature of your posts.

May I ask what prescription drugs you are on, and what conditions they were intended to heal?
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Nadir on August 23, 2019, 03:15:30 PM
 :pray: :pray: :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: SeanJohnson on August 23, 2019, 03:17:22 PM
Matto-

How long before you changed your avatar did you start taking these prescription drugs?

I ask, because that is about the time we all noticed a dramatic change in the nature of your posts.

May I ask what prescription drugs you are on, and what conditions they were intended to heal?
PS: I also noticed that around the time you changed your avatar (June?), you took an 18 day hiatus from posting on the forum (June 8 - June 26), which was not typical for you.  Just wondered if something bad or challenging happened in your life during that time?  I am praying for you.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Syracuse on August 23, 2019, 03:25:38 PM
:pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Alexandria on August 23, 2019, 03:33:21 PM
Keeping you in my prayers, Matto.

Satan is working overtime on many.  His time must be very short.

Courage, dear man!

Cling to Our Blessed Mother.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: josefamenendez on August 23, 2019, 03:58:37 PM
 :pray: :pray: :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: forlorn on August 23, 2019, 05:32:50 PM
I'm gonna have to agree with Seán and Vermont, Matto, I think you might be having some adverse side effects from whatever you're taking. I've noticed as well recently that your posts are more off-the-wall and slightly manic, with many non-sequiturs. I skimmed through your post history to confirm my suspicions and I noticed that your posts were much more lucid and had much easier to follow trains-of-thought before your hiatus. Honestly, no offence - I'm only saying this because I'm honestly a little worried and I can't think of a nicer way to put it, but recently you've been coming across as muddled and even a bit high. Posts like this where you worry that you mightn't be able to trust your own mind deepens those fears. I feel like you might be having an adverse reaction to, or overdosing on, whatever medication you've been given and I really do hope you check to make sure.

I know recently you've said it's just a case of your mind wandering as you type, but there's definitely been a distinct shift in your writing style and some of your posts really have gone far beyond what I'd consider a normal stream of consciousness ramble, certainly nothing like how you used to post.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Quo vadis Domine on August 23, 2019, 05:47:21 PM
 :pray: :pray: :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Vintagewife3 on August 23, 2019, 05:52:58 PM
I’m glad you mentioned something because I’ve been reading your post, and worried about you. The stuff you posted just didn’t seem like you. I’ll be keeping you in my prayers ❤️
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 23, 2019, 07:04:43 PM
Thank you for your prayers, everyone.

My hiatus was because I was ill and was hospitalized. I was also spiritually ill and fell into mortal sin. Then I made a good confession and got well and got out of the hospital and was able to start attending Mass again. My hospital stay was harrowing. I will not disclose exactly what medicines I am taking but I have discussed my problems more than I probably should, and they are not a secret. I am not well, but I am trying to get better. I do not think my issue is my medication as I feel alright there, I do believe it is a spiritual problem, basically having strange temptations late at night.

I believe I am well considering the crosses I have to bear, but I feel strange temptations, especially at night time. I don't know if it is the world, the flesh or the devil, but I think it is the devil. I am also feeling rather childish. Wanting to read and write faerie tales, play the guitar, and write poetry, and take pictures of flowers and watch animals (and watch people, especially children and women [I love women so, so much, which is dangerous]). Kind of like the idea of being a fool for Christ. I am not worried about that. And I want to get married now (which is new for me), though in a scientific way that would seem unlikely, but God is not a scientist. I also have a disturbing novel to finish. I am also trying to be better to my parents.

Through prayer and meditation I have also changed my ideas about the whole Church situation. Now I believe sedevacantism is wrong, but that many sedevacantists are good Catholics. I do attend an SSPX chapel but still love Bishop Williamson. I still think the Novus Ordo is bad, but I believe it is often valid. So I will visit the Blessed Sacrament in my local parish and pray before Him.

I have more hope now than I ever have in my life. I am happier than I ever have been. I believe I am doing well spiritually. But there are temptations and mine are strange and humiliating.

My new avatar is from my garden. I am growing wildflowers from seeds. So far there are white ones, yellow ones, fuchsia ones, and red ones. I figure it is more fitting than a picture of Jesus, even though it is one of my favorite pictures of Jesus.

My biggest problem is I am too trusting. I cannot discern. I let God in but I leave the door open and sometimes the devil comes to me. Or at least that is how it seems. I am too trusting. My Father calls me naive. He says people can smell my naivite.

The posts about animals are very good I think and I am proud of them. Please try to appreciate them. I put a lot of heart into them.

But thank you for your prayers. We are trying to convert my neighborhood, Richmond Hill, and make it a good place.

My blog seems to be becoming a collection of a diary, poetry, and riddles. It is a niche project, not meant to become popular. 
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: 1st Mansion Tenant on August 23, 2019, 08:17:18 PM
Rosary for you tonight, Matto.  :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Struthio on August 23, 2019, 09:11:49 PM
Praying for poor drugged Matto in liberal New York where they fear candle hells.

(https://www.cathinfo.com/Smileys/classic/pray.gif)
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Seraphina on August 23, 2019, 09:48:41 PM
Ditto everyone else who is concerned.

  Matto, please show your posts to your SSPX confessor.  A complete and sudden change in a person’s manner of speaking, writing, relating to others is indicative of a chemical imbalance of the brain.  Something is wrong here.  PLEASE reach out to your priest, your counselor, and your medical doctor.  If YOU think nothing’s wrong, then go, armed with CathInfo on your device.  Tell the experts that numerous OTHERS think you may be having a bad reaction or complication.  

Please go and keep us updated.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: SeanJohnson on August 23, 2019, 09:56:41 PM
Matto said:

"But there are temptations and mine are strange and humiliating."

Response:

Whan you have these "temptations," are they attractive, or repulsive, to you?  In other words, I am wondering whether they are really to be categorized as "temptations" or "obsessions."
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Syracuse on August 24, 2019, 04:18:36 AM
 
Quote
Please pray for all of us in the New York City area. We need your prayers. It is hard being a Catholic in New York City.

Bishop Williamson says people should move out of the cities and move to the country.

If your doctor is a Jew, replace him with a non-Jew.

Best to get off the prescriptions, for they cause more harm than good.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: forlorn on August 24, 2019, 05:17:19 AM
Thank you for your prayers, everyone.

My hiatus was because I was ill and was hospitalized. I was also spiritually ill and fell into mortal sin. Then I made a good confession and got well and got out of the hospital and was able to start attending Mass again. My hospital stay was harrowing. I will not disclose exactly what medicines I am taking but I have discussed my problems more than I probably should, and they are not a secret. I am not well, but I am trying to get better. I do not think my issue is my medication as I feel alright there, I do believe it is a spiritual problem, basically having strange temptations late at night.
What sort of temptations? And I'd echo Seán's question: Are these temptations something you want to do(like for example eating more than you should), or are they temptations to do things you don't want to do(like the call of the void or OCD)?

I'm glad that you're feeling more hopeful than before, I noticed in the past you were world-weary and you've been much more optimistic lately, but it's not a case of your posting style not being popular that has people concerned. You've been acting strange and it's not just down to your newfound hopefulness. I think there's likely more to it than just a spiritual problem, but if it is a spiritual problem then it's quite a serious one. Most likely however I think it's a problem with the medication - I remember one of my friends was accidentally overdosing on his medication once and he was acting very strangely until the doctor sorted him out, and although it was much more severe and for a shorter time period I can't help but wonder if your situation is similar. Some adverse reaction to it at least. 
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: 2Vermont on August 24, 2019, 06:07:46 AM
Matto said:

"But there are temptations and mine are strange and humiliating."

Response:

Whan you have these "temptations," are they attractive, or repulsive, to you?  In other words, I am wondering whether they are really to be categorized as "temptations" or "obsessions."
Interesting that you asked that because for some reason Matto's situation makes me think of Annaliese Rose and the effect her prescribed drugs had on her obsessions/possession and the efficacy of her exorcism. 
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 24, 2019, 07:42:22 AM
Ditto everyone else who is concerned.

  Matto, please show your posts to your SSPX confessor.  A complete and sudden change in a person’s manner of speaking, writing, relating to others is indicative of a chemical imbalance of the brain.  Something is wrong here.  PLEASE reach out to your priest, your counselor, and your medical doctor.  If YOU think nothing’s wrong, then go, armed with CathInfo on your device.  Tell the experts that numerous OTHERS think you may be having a bad reaction or complication.  

Please go and keep us updated.
I will show my Cathinfo posts since I got back to my confessor. Thank you.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 24, 2019, 07:43:25 AM
Matto said:

"But there are temptations and mine are strange and humiliating."

Response:

Whan you have these "temptations," are they attractive, or repulsive, to you?  In other words, I am wondering whether they are really to be categorized as "temptations" or "obsessions."
When they come at the moment they seem attractive.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: SeanJohnson on August 24, 2019, 07:45:55 AM
When they come at the moment they seem attractive.

That's a relief, because it indicates temptation, and not obsession.

As for the temptations, well, you are probably old enough by now to know how to deal with that (i.e., You just play a game with it, and say to yourself, "Oh, that again," and dismiss it and move on; don't let it get to you).

One person I know turned it around on the devil, and every time he was tempted with horrendous thoughts, prayed, "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, save souls."  

It had the double-effect of simultaneously blocking the intrusive thought (i.e., you can't think two things at once, even though it seems like you sometimes can, really it is only very quick thoughts in succession going back and forth, or at best a partial hybrid of both thoughts), and making the temptation an occasion to virtue and merit, so that the devil was unwittingly helping to sanctify the person.

Well, I hope you are in good communication with your doctors and priest, and we are praying for you.

No reason why you shouldn't get better.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: poche on August 24, 2019, 11:40:39 PM
It is hard being a Catholic anywhere.
:pray: :pray: :pray:
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Seraphina on August 25, 2019, 12:10:17 AM
It is hard being a Catholic anywhere.
:pray: :pray: :pray:
Yes, but living in NYC is much more difficult than, say, a rural area that is free from crime and constant temptation.  In NY, I can’t walk out the door and walk a block without seeing or hearing something offensive to Our Lord, even if it’s just the satanic gang tag spray painted on the wall in the alley.  I guarantee by the time I get to work, I’ve seen a dozen or more immodest, or persons of indeterminate sex, heard the f-bomb and worse, heard unholy music, and gone past two mosques, a Buddhist temple, and a Hindu temple in the shape of Ganesh.  I call these temptations, although to me, any temptation is to anger or disgust rather than attraction.  
If I walk out my country friend’s door in rural West Virginia and walk the equivalent distance, the only offensive thing I may possibly see is the sometimes scantily clad young single mother who lives in the trailer down the road.  In her case, it’s generational poverty and ignorance to blame more than malicious intent.  If she comes down to my friend’s home, she always throws on a cover-up of some sort since she knows how they feel about shorts and spaghetti strap tops.  
My friend homeschools most of her grandchildren who live locally.  They go to Mass every 4-6 weeks in Kentucky as there’s just nowhere closer.  They moved in 2006 hoping to start a Catholic community, but it didn’t pan out.  After the recession hit in 2008, they were pretty much stuck, and have been, ever since.  It’s sad, though, that the adult children, once they move away for school or work, or if they don’t marry young, all abandon the Faith.  
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Glycogen on August 25, 2019, 12:48:14 PM
Do you not know what's going to happen to cities and, to a lesser but still devastating degree, suburbs when the balloon goes up?

(((They've))) been mockingly warning you through their TV shows and Hollywood movies for at least two decades, letting you know what they have in store for you all.

Normalcy bias can be fatal. Time to snap out of the mental fog.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Eliza10 on August 25, 2019, 03:45:51 PM
Matto, about temptation. We all get it, and it is, as you know, from the devil, who prowls around waiting for an "in", a little moment when we are not being watchful. Then he comes in and pounces after this watching and waiting, when he sees an opportunity, like when we are tired and alone, between prayers, discouraged, or dull for whatever reason (low blood sugar?). 

He tempted Eve, making her now see things that she did not see before. How conflicted she must have been, but she was overpowered by her temptation. This must be natural for all of us, except by the help of God.  Jesus says that she could have overcome it if she had come to Him. He (http://www.valtorta.org/the_annunciation_defaultpage.asp) says,

She "saw". And seeing, she wanted to try. Her flesh was aroused. Oh! If she had called to God! If she had hurried to Him saying: "Father! The Serpent has caressed* me and I am upset". The Father would have purified and healed her with His breath, which could have infused new innocence into her as it had infused life. And it would have made her forget the snake's poison, nay it would have engendered in her a disgust for the Serpent, as it happens in those who bear an instinctive dislike for diseases of which they have just been cured. But Eve does not go to the Father. Eve goes back to the Serpent. The sensation is a sweet one for her. "Seeing that the fruit of the tree was good to eat and pleasing and agreeable to the eye, she took it and ate it".

[*the "caress" referred to here is understood to be the caress of words, not touch]
[the link you see is from Valtorta's work, that is favored by Bsp.Wmson, whom you mentioned but distracted by some].


Ever since I read "what-to-do" from Jesus many years back, I have always done just this when unwanted temptations or ugly thoughts and ideas pop into my mind. Like I hear something ugly and my mind begins to dwell on it. I do it the very moment, most especially if I find myself liking to think of something I know God would not want me thinking of - I ask God to please take away this ugly thought right now. To stop it. And He ALWAYS does! Pretty much INSTANTLY! If He did not, I would keep asking, but He does immediately, so far (for some years now).  It is just like He said - we are to HURRY to Him, and tell him we are upset by these thoughts, and He purifies us of it immediately with His power. We should seek to have this "new life, new innocence" all the time, which we cannot achieve on our own, but only with the help of God, and then because it is His work, not ours, it is EASY. Any comfortable innocence and clarity I have inside me is not from me, but from God, who gives it to me and to anyone generously whenever He is asked for it. See, so it really is this simple. Do you love St. Therese the Little Flower? Because she helps us to be simple, as I know you strive to be. The Little Way is a good way for us.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Nadir on August 25, 2019, 05:38:53 PM

 Jesus says that she could have overcome it if she had come to Him. He (http://www.valtorta.org/the_annunciation_defaultpage.asp) says,

She "saw". And seeing, she wanted to try. Her flesh was aroused. Oh! If she had called to God! If she had hurried to Him saying: "Father! The Serpent has caressed* me and I am upset". The Father would have purified and healed her with His breath, which could have infused new innocence into her as it had infused life. And it would have made her forget the snake's poison, nay it would have engendered in her a disgust for the Serpent, as it happens in those who bear an instinctive dislike for diseases of which they have just been cured. But Eve does not go to the Father. Eve goes back to the Serpent. The sensation is a sweet one for her. "Seeing that the fruit of the tree was good to eat and pleasing and agreeable to the eye, she took it and ate it".

[*the "caress" referred to here is understood to be the caress of words, not touch]
[the link you see is from Valtorta's work, that is favored by Bsp.Wmson, whom you mentioned but distracted by some].
Here is the account of the temptation from Genesis 3:

[1] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=1-#x) Now the serpent was more subtle than any of the beasts of the earth which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman: Why hath God commanded you, that you should not eat of every tree of paradise? [2] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=2-#x) And the woman answered him, saying: Of the fruit of the trees that are in paradise we do eat: [3] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=3-#x) But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of paradise, God hath commanded us that we should not eat; and that we should not touch it, lest perhaps we die. [4] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=4-#x) And the serpent said to the woman: No, you shall not die the death. [5] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=5-#x) For God doth know that in what day soever you shall eat thereof, your eyes shall be opened: and you shall be as Gods, knowing good and evil.[6] (http://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=1&ch=3&l=6-#x) And the woman saw that the tree was good to eat, and fair to the eyes, and delightful to behold: and she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave to her husband who did eat.

The above quote is a fabrication not to be trusted. Stick with what the Church teaches. We don't need fabrications by the deranged.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Viva Cristo Rey on August 25, 2019, 07:46:47 PM
Yes, we will pray for Matto and everyone.    Please pray for me. 
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: 2Vermont on August 25, 2019, 08:05:46 PM
Matto, I would start with checking with your doctor about those "prescription drugs" you told us you were taking.  I'm concerned.
Just want to add that I am praying for you Matto.  
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 25, 2019, 08:30:13 PM
Thank you all for your prayers. They are gold. Went to confession and Communion today to tidy up my soul. I have to talk to my priest about my issues. 
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: confusedcatholic on August 26, 2019, 02:06:31 AM
Do you not know what's going to happen to cities and, to a lesser but still devastating degree, suburbs when the balloon goes up?

No, I do not know. Please enlighten me. What balloon? I do not watch TV/movies.
Will pray for Matto



Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: claudel on August 26, 2019, 02:52:08 AM
I join my prayers with those of the many others who are praying for you, Matto.

My especial worry is that you might have suffered a mild-to-moderate stroke. For some considerable time your comments here have manifested elements suggestive of both disorientation and a marked reorientation away from prior reasonable interests and concerns. These characteristics frequently follow in the wake of a cerebrovascular event.

If it seems to you that I am off the mark, please understand that no offense was intended. But if the moral and emotional reorientation you appear to be experiencing troubles you as much as it sometimes appears to, you ought to consider consulting a neurologist.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: Matto on August 26, 2019, 06:14:19 AM
I am going to the doctor today for an evaluation of my condition. I will let her know how I am doing and see what she has to say and try to follow her advice. :baby:Thanks all for your prayers.
Title: Re: Pray for me and us
Post by: forlorn on August 26, 2019, 06:19:52 AM
I am going to the doctor today for an evaluation of my condition. I will let her know how I am doing and see what she has to say and try to follow her advice. :baby:Thanks all for your prayers.
God bless and good luck.