I am praying that, A., you don't hurt yourself, for crying out loud, and that, B., the Spirit grants you peace so that you might be calm and collected in front of those people, which will, if not improve your playing, keep you from making mistakes because of your nerves.
For it is not you that speak, but the Spirit of your Father that speaketh in you. Matt 10:20
For it is not you that [play], but the Spirit of your Father that [playeth] in you. Fixed!
Have you considered dedicating the performance to Our Lord and Lady, and playing to them, not to the audience?
I'm so edified that "Hobbledehoy" is here. He adds so much; and I'm thankful. God Bless you.
Thank you all for your prayers.
In short, let me tell the tale from the beginning.
I graduated high school a few months ago. This piano recital has been planned since around December 2011. The program then is almost entirely different from its present state.
Aside from the unexpected deaths of my uncle and grandmother in early 2012, I was seriously contemplating quitting piano for many months until very recently, when a rather random encounter with Rachmaninoff's Second Piano concerto rekindled my love for Romantic piano literature. So aside from being out of state and losing months of practice due to funerals, my heart was not in practicing piano. I was very lazy about it.
To complicate matters, I was at that time the organ scholar at a local cathedral. As part of this position, I had to give a 45 minute recital just about a month ago. So after I graduated high school, I had to make a one hour commute to the cathedral to practice on the organ for several hours straight, kill time at the local library while I waited for my father to finish up at his workplace and then finally commute back home in the evening, after which I was utterly exhausted and in little shape to practice piano.
Only after I finished with that organ recital last month could I finally devote all my time to piano. But it was not to be so - because now it is close to the time that I need to pack up my things and get paperwork straightened out for going off to college. So I have been juggling so many things at once.
Even though my love for piano was reignited, it's not as though that turned me into Franz Liszt overnight. But the time I vowed to take piano seriously again, it was far to late into the game to finish my proposed recital program in time. True, I could rush and fake it through some of the pieces, masking my mistakes with the pedal like an amateur - but as my first solo piano recital, why would I want to start it off like a pseudo-musician?
In the end, I emailed my teacher, explaining to him my feelings and apologizing for my ineptitude and laziness but firmly informing him that I had to cut two pieces from the program if I was going to play at all.
I am feeling a lot better, although I am still convinced the recital will be mediocre. Cutting those two pieces out has turned this recital into half-an-hour of medium tempo pieces that will bore most listeners to death.
The recital is scheduled for this Friday.
Here are Youtube recordings of some of the pieces I played in the organ recital (not played by me in the recordings though!)
Bach – Prelude and Fugue in G minor, BWV 535 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnzhbRfabMs)
Mendelssohn – Prelude and Fugue in C minor (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9ZFvCbm75s&feature=related)
Buxtehude – Toccata in F major (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4u14_yotoaY)
And here are some of the pieces that I removed from my Friday piano recital.
They are actually learned, just not in performing condition.
Liszt – Un Sospiro (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pq-y9KGqssc)
Chopin – Etude Op. 10 No. 12 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hOKcdZJJFU)
Chopin – Etude Op. 25 No. 12 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5M2PO4f5Y7k)
These are a few pieces that are in my program. Though they do not display the same pyrotechnics as other pieces, they are works of extraordinary emotional intensity.
Brahms Op. 118 No. 2 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1h4Re5WBEAc)
Poulenc – Melancolie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIsG4BO1cAE)