Nadir is right, someone is praying for you.
I will pray for you sync. I've been following your posts. Your pain and confusion is evident. But let's look at the cup half full and build upon the base:
-You're honest with your thoughts, and that's the only way to root out error.
-When someone points out the error in a particular statement, you acknowledge your mistake. That's humility, the cornerstone of holiness. "Thou art are not far from the Kingdom of God"
. Mark 12:34
-You're struggling and searching, and you haven't given up. Why? It seems you're being specially called by the Holy Ghost, because despite your fear of Catholicism and being drawn to protestantism, you are seeking truth and instinctively know it can only be found in the Faith. He has great plans for you, if you have the courage.
To your original post, we must define "happiness". It is peace of soul. Only Catholics
can have this great gift from the Father, dearly purchased by His Son.
The so called "happiness" of non Catholics (cults like protestants and muslims, or agnostics, atheists etc) is merely childish gratifications of the senses pertaining to worldly possessions or experiences. Their 'churches' and lives are dysfunctional, often extremely so, since they lack the fullness of truth, only found in the Catholic Faith. Even those who seem happy (I've been around prots all my life) have a cracking of the veneer, if you will - always searching and never quite satisfied.
Please find a traditional priest, make an appointment with him. Talk to him about some of your fundamental questions and ask him to direct you to materials that will help you to learn about the Faith. He will know best what to advise you, after determining your state.
In the meantime, The Hound of Heaven reminds me of you. First paragraph:
I fled Him, down the nights and down the days;
I fled Him, down the arches of the years;
I fled Him, down the labyrinthine ways
Of my own mind; and in the midst of tears
I hid from Him, and under running laughter.
Up vistaed hopes I sped;
And shot, precipitated,
Adown Titanic glooms of chasmed fears,
From those strong Feet that followed, followed after.
But with unhurrying chase,
And unperturbèd pace,
Deliberate speed, majestic instancy,
They beat—and a Voice beat
More instant than the Feet—
'All things betray thee, who betrayest Me'.