The Note

Fred was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his pastor. As the pastor stood beside the bed, Fred's frail condition grew worse, and he began to flail about as he tried to speak. Being unable to do so, he then motioned frantically for something to write on.

The priest, keeping watch at the side of his bed leaned quietly over and asked, "Do you have something you would like to say?"

Fred nodded to the affirmative, and the priest handed him a pad and pen. "I know you can't speak, but use this to write a note, and I will give it to your wife. She's waiting just outside."

Gathering his last ounce of strength, Fred took them and scrawled his message upon the pad which he stuffed into the priest's hands. Then, moments later, he died.

The pastor thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. After administering the last rites, the priest left to break the sad news to the wife.

Several days later, at the funeral, the pastor delivered the eulogy. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Fred died. "You know," he said, "Old Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it yet, but knowing Fred, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all." He unfolded the note and proceeded to aloud, "GET OFF MY OXYGEN TUBE!!"