Catholic Info

Traditional Catholic Faith => Funny Stuff for Catholics => Topic started by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:41:21 AM

Title: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:41:21 AM
I decided I'll start this thread and post some original jokes I made here, and maybe some not original memes related to the subject. Feel free to contribute. ;)
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:44:49 AM
Someone: "You look like an angel 😇"
Me: "Oh yeah? Have you seen any of them before?"
Someone: "Nah I meant..."
Me: "Then you're either dumb or lying to say I look like something you've never even seen before. What's wrong with today's kids?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:45:37 AM
Someone: "You look like an angel (https://web.telegram.org/k/assets/img/emoji/1f607.png)"
Me: "Oh yea? What kind?"
Someone: "Wdym?"
Me: "?? There are 3 triads and 9 names of the ranks of angels, what angel were you talking about?"
Someone: "Uhh-umm, nvm..."
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:46:17 AM
Someone: "You look like an angel (https://web.telegram.org/k/assets/img/emoji/1f607.png)"
Me: "So I'm invisible??"
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:47:07 AM
Someone: "You look like an angel (https://web.telegram.org/k/assets/img/emoji/1f607.png)"
Me: "That's a blasphemy."
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:48:27 AM
We're like meatballs and pasta. People think we should be together, but we actually shouldn't. 

(Italians will know what I mean)
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:54:34 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/5rAlTXo.png)
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 10:56:58 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/QyiYZc4.png)
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: DigitalLogos on March 10, 2022, 11:39:25 AM
Why?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 11:40:29 AM
Why?
Why what?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: DigitalLogos on March 10, 2022, 11:47:40 AM
Why what?
Just why this thread?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 11:50:40 AM
Just why this thread?
Why not?
It's obviously for fun.
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Ladislaus on March 10, 2022, 12:08:41 PM
Someone once told me (and I wasn't wearing a cassock or anything) that "you look like a priest".  So I responded, "What does a priest look like?"

About 10 years ago, on another occasion, I had some lady come up to me in a grocery store one time.  She had no idea who I was, had nevet met me before.  She told me out of the blue that I would become a priest.  I was totally puzzle by the remark.  She had no idea I was even a Catholic.

In any case, the OP's post about "look like an angel" reminded me of this incident.
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Ladislaus on March 10, 2022, 12:09:58 PM
So is this thread about bad "pickup" lines?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 12:26:58 PM
So is this thread about bad "pickup" lines?
It can include that. Just hilarious things that people do that makes you realize how they're still single. 



Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 12:45:58 PM
Someone once told me (and I wasn't wearing a cassock or anything) that "you look like a priest".  So I responded, "What does a priest look like?"

About 10 years ago, on another occasion, I had some lady come up to me in a grocery store one time.  She had no idea who I was, had nevet met me before.  She told me out of the blue that I would become a priest.  I was totally puzzle by the remark.  She had no idea I was even a Catholic.

In any case, the OP's post about "look like an angel" reminded me of this incident.
Are you on your way to the seminary or...?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Kazimierz on March 10, 2022, 02:02:04 PM
You must have fallen from Heaven….

So that makes me the Devil?
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: DigitalLogos on March 10, 2022, 03:49:55 PM
Are you on your way to the seminary or...?
He was in seminary ages ago
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Seraphina on March 10, 2022, 03:55:58 PM
Go directly from your job on the docks as a fish cleaner to your girlfriend’s house.  That way both the girl and her father know you are gainfully employed.  Maybe bring a house gift for her mother of a slab of fresh flounder or a live lobster.  
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Mark 79 on March 10, 2022, 04:17:32 PM
Go directly from your job on the docks as a fish cleaner to your girlfriend’s house.  That way both the girl and her father know you are gainfully employed.  Maybe bring a house gift for her mother of a slab of fresh flounder or a live lobster. 
Flounder is delicious. I think the much smaller sand dabs are even more delicious.
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Seraphina on March 10, 2022, 05:31:04 PM
Flounder is delicious. I think the much smaller sand dabs are even more delicious.
So, are you married?  To the fishmonger’s daughter?   Personally, I wouldn’t object to the flounder or the lobster, but the physical appearance and smell of my date might turn me off…dead fish, axle grease, diesel fuel?   If, however, the date was to accompany him on a fishing trip, I’d might be up for it.
Title: Re: How to NEVER GET A DATE for the rest of your life (as a faithful catholic)
Post by: Philothea3 on March 10, 2022, 06:11:31 PM
Go directly from your job on the docks as a fish cleaner to your girlfriend’s house.  That way both the girl and her father know you are gainfully employed.  Maybe bring a house gift for her mother of a slab of fresh flounder or a live lobster. 
Haha, I'd accept the gifts but not the fish cleaner.