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Author Topic: Funny Stuff  (Read 398000 times)

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Offline Neil Obstat

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Re: Funny Stuff
« Reply #210 on: October 19, 2018, 04:44:42 PM »
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    • Quote from: Cantarella on October 19, 2018, 10:05:44 AM
    ...
    The 3 cobwebs in the last frame really make it happen.
    .
    I would have had some niter growing on the stone walls, too! Like in Poe's The Cask of Amontillado:
    .
    .
    Maybe some green ooze stain running down the side of the mattress.
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    Offline Maria Regina

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #211 on: October 19, 2018, 05:11:38 PM »
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    • Quote from: Neil Obstat on October 19, 2018, 04:44:42 PM
    The 3 cobwebs in the last frame really make it happen.
    .
    It is sad how Ford, Debra Katz, Maxine Waters, and Diane Feinstein have destroyed all fairy tales so that all the noble-minded Christian men in shining armor would now be afraid to rescue a princess or dame in distress.
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    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #212 on: October 20, 2018, 10:06:07 AM »
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    • Banned From Playing Violent Video Games, Local Kid Settles For Reading Old Testament



    MINNEAPOLIS, MN—After his parents banned him from playing violent video games, local 7-year-old Liam Connor reluctantly decided to open his Bible and read the Old Testament to get his fill of "blood and guts."

    Though at first he was skeptical that the Bible could be as violent as PUBG, Bloodborne, or Hotline Miami, he quickly lost interest in playing violent video games as he became mesmerized with the large amount of gore in the Old Testament.

    "Well, if I can't snipe people's brains out in Call of Duty, at least I can read about this dude who totally went nuts on all these people with an ox goad," he said under his breath after his parents declined his request to pick him up a copy of Black Ops 4. "This is lit."

    The boy's craving to run over pedestrians and cause general mayhem in Grand Theft Auto V was satiated by his readthrough of the conquest of Canaan, while his desire to blow out zombie brains in Left 4 Dead 2 and slay demons in Doom was partially quelled by the narrative of the imprecatory psalms. "The Doom Slayer may be able to rip demons' skeletons out of their bodies with his bare hands, but he sure never prayed for their infants to be dashed against the rocks."

    At publishing time, the boy had discovered Song of Solomon.

    https://babylonbee.com/news/banned-from-playing-violent-video-games-local-kid-settles-for-reading-old-testament?fbclid=IwAR0k9MdrX07M_E45MUqpjrgQBOnn09OS_jK7lZm_i2wEx3cu6pxJoy9ZJY8
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #213 on: October 21, 2018, 10:16:02 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #214 on: October 21, 2018, 10:16:18 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #215 on: October 21, 2018, 10:17:06 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #216 on: October 21, 2018, 10:19:28 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Maria Regina

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #217 on: October 21, 2018, 11:17:02 AM »
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    • What do you call a 5 cent technician?




    Scroll down for the answer:




























    A tech-nickel

    Groan!
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    Offline Maria Regina

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #218 on: October 21, 2018, 11:18:40 AM »
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    • Why did the fly avoid the computer?

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    He was afraid of the world wide web and all the spiders.

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    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #219 on: October 22, 2018, 11:23:49 PM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #220 on: October 22, 2018, 11:24:36 PM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #221 on: October 22, 2018, 11:24:52 PM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #222 on: October 25, 2018, 10:38:11 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #223 on: October 25, 2018, 10:38:50 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.

    Offline Cantarella

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    Re: Funny Stuff
    « Reply #224 on: October 25, 2018, 10:40:44 AM »
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    If anyone says that true and natural water is not necessary for baptism and thus twists into some metaphor the words of our Lord Jesus Christ" Unless a man be born again of water and the Holy Spirit" (Jn 3:5) let him be anathema.
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