CathInfo.com

The results of a poll made by United Nations came out. The question was: "Please, tell us honestly what is your opinion about the abundance vs. scarcity of food in the rest of the world." The results were as follows:
# The Europeans did not understand what was meant by "scarcity".
# The Africans did not understand "abundance."
# The Americans asked the meaning of the "rest of the world".
# The Chinese, puzzled, asked for an explanation of "opinion".
# Meanwhile, in the Italian Parliament, they are still debating the meaning of "honestly".      

Classic European Heaven & Hell:

Heaven: Where cooks are French, mechanics are German, police are English, lovers are Italian and everything is organized by the Swiss.

Hell: Where cooks are English, mechanics are French, police are Germans, lovers are Swiss and everything is organized by the Italians.

Nationalities:

- A cruise ship captain has to convince the passengers of his sinking ship to jump overboard. He has to use a different approach with each European. He tells the English it would be unsporting of them not to jump. He tells the French it would be the smart thing to do. He tells the Germans that it is an order. And he tells the Italians that jumping overboard is forbidden.