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Traditional Catholic Faith => SSPX Resistance News => Topic started by: jman123 on September 06, 2025, 10:37:36 AM

Title: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: jman123 on September 06, 2025, 10:37:36 AM
I have seen Missouri court filings stating SSPX priest Father Duverger is living in Florida with an 18 year old girl. Father Pagliarani is visiting Sanford these days. What is going on with Sanford Fl SSPX?

https://www.courts.mo.gov/cnet/cases/newHeader.do?inputVO.caseNumber=24AE-CC00184&inputVO.courtId=SMPDB0001_CT06#docket
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 06, 2025, 10:56:49 AM
I have seen Missouri court filings stating SSPX priest Father Duverger is living in Florida with an 18 year old girl. Father Pagliarani is visiting Sanford these days. What is going on with Sanford Fl SSPX?

https://www.courts.mo.gov/cnet/cases/newHeader.do?inputVO.caseNumber=24AE-CC00184&inputVO.courtId=SMPDB0001_CT06#docket

Not to be worldly or trite, but 18 years old is legal age in the United States.

Yes, for a priest to be with any woman is a scandal. That goes without saying.
But would the US courts get involved if a priest wanted to commit sins of sacrilege and sensuality? Those are not crimes in America (unfortunately) nor are they punishable by law.

In America, the law of the land is "do what thou wilt" at least in relationship matters. It is legal to date, be intimate with, whoever and whatever you want, divorce, you name it.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: jman123 on September 06, 2025, 11:02:49 AM
Not to be worldly or trite, but 18 years old is legal age in the United States.

Yes, for a priest to be with any woman is a scandal. That goes without saying.
But would the US courts get involved if a priest wanted to commit sins of sacrilege and sensuality? Those are not crimes in America (unfortunately) nor are they punishable by law.

In America, the law of the land is "do what thou wilt" at least in relationship matters. It is legal to date, be intimate with, whoever and whatever you want, divorce, you name it.
The issue at hand seems like SSPX lied about Fr Duverger. Lots of fishy stuff in Sanford
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Maverick on September 06, 2025, 11:05:03 AM
The issue at hand seems like SSPX lied about Fr Duverger. Lots of fishy stuff in Sanford

Not the SSPX of old, this new sspx
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Twice dyed on September 06, 2025, 12:14:57 PM
Old or neoSspx?



https://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/44589/kansas-investigating-sɛҳuąƖ-abuse-claims-in-breakaway-society-of-st-pius-x



"...She told CNA she met with a priest of the society, Fr. Pierre Duverger, in Kansas City and in St. Mary's in late 2013 and early 2014, to talk about serial sɛҳuąƖ abuse committed against her by a family member while she was a child.  When she met with the priest, a decade had passed since the abuse, and Jacas was 22 years old.

Jacas said Fr. Duverger soon began asking her..."
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 12:36:28 PM
The issue at hand seems like SSPX lied about Fr Duverger. Lots of fishy stuff in Sanford

But that's not illegal either, even if sinful and immoral and unethical ... unless you're under oath, committing perjury, etc.

So if Fr. Duverger were, say, living in a consensual situation with an 18-year-old and SSPX lied about it .. while that would discredit SSPX and Fr. Duverger, neither of those would be illegal or end up in the courts.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 12:37:51 PM
Old or neoSspx?

How is that Jacas situation related to this?  At no point did Jacas say that Fr. Duverger ever touched her or do anything more than ask what she considered to be inappropriate questions.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Twice dyed on September 06, 2025, 01:28:37 PM
How is that Jacas situation related to this?  At no point did Jacas say that Fr. Duverger ever touched her or do anything more than ask what she considered to be inappropriate questions.
I imagined that if Fr. Pierre Duverger's name was on this Alias Summons, maybe somehow it involved an event from way back.  But now I see that Stephen Sanborn is on the docket : 7/07/2025
 Different kettle of fish, but fishy regardless.
I'm not following too clearly, so is this at all in the matter at hand?
*****
https://catholicconfidential.substack.com/p/lawsuit-shows-sspx-obedience-to-1983

"...The lawsuit claims that the SSPX placed Duverger (a cleric previously under restrictions for past accusations involving women) under the authority of Rostand (a known child predator and now convicted child molester), and that the SSPX should have known they would fail to supervise one another..."



Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 06, 2025, 01:36:32 PM
Lawsuit Shows SSPX Obedience to 1983 Pro-Pedophile Law Led to Pervert Priests Breaking-up Family of Eight
Kansas City, Missouri Lawsuit Exposes Grave Danger to Families Caused by SSPX Governance, Canon Law & Current Policy - by James Grein, Matthew David
 (https://substack.com/@catholicconfidential)
Bill Wilson (https://substack.com/@catholicconfidential)
Jul 13, 2024

 (https://catholicconfidential.substack.com/p/lawsuit-shows-sspx-obedience-to-1983/comments)


Fr. Arnaud Rostand, previous US District Superior of the SSPX and a convicted child molester, and his assistant, alleged-pervert Fr. Pierre Duverger, are both named in a just-filed tortious lawsuit by aggrieved father of six, Stephen Sanborn. They are charged with causing harm that directly caused the breakup of the family of eight.
The SSPX’s Biggest Problem 
While the court will determine the merits of the case, it should be stated in the beginning of this article that had the SSPX rejected the 1983 Code of Canon Law—like other traditionalist groups—this situation would not have happened. Put another way, had the SSPX instead chosen the approach of long-standing, traditional Catholic justice, the priests in question would never have arisen to the high office of US District Superior, nor would they have been reassigned following charges of sɛҳuąƖ misconduct. 
Unlike other traditional groups who reject the 1983 Code of Canon Law mentioned in our previous report (https://catholicconfidential.substack.com/p/three-traditional-bishops-who-protect) (such as groups led by Bishops Meikle, Sanborn, and Vigano), the SSPX claims obedience to the Roman Pontiff and their adoption of Vatican II’s justice system via the 1983 Code. This portion of Canon Law (c. 1341, c. 1321), directly protects admitted predators like Rostand and alleged perpetrators like Duverger. But, the SSPX picks and chooses when and how they submit to Rome regarding the 1983 Code. For example, when adjudicating annulments (c. 1065), the SSPX voluntarily rejects portions of the law. And when deciding the fate of perverts and pedophiles, the sections of the 1983 Canon Code which seek to “rehabilitate and heal” sɛҳuąƖ predators instead of removing them, are applied. 
Accusations of schism against the SSPX abound, but ironically it is their precise obedience to the Holy Father in applying the 1983 Code of Canon Law that permits repeat offenders of sex crime to remain in their ministry.
“Hence it follows that what constitutes the substantial ‘novelty’ of the Second Vatican Council, in line with the legislative tradition of the Church, especially in regard to ecclesiology, constitutes likewise the ‘novelty’ of the new Code.” - St. John Paul II, Sacrae Disciplinae Leges, January 25th, 1983 (https://www.vatican.va/content/john-paul-ii/en/apost_constitutions/docuмents/hf_jp-ii_apc_25011983_sacrae-disciplinae-leges.html)
This journalist has pleaded with the SSPX administration, priests, and leadership to immediately start protecting the faithful from predatory clerics and reject this damnable section of the 1983 (and 2021 update) Code of Canon law.
The Lawsuit's Allegations 
The lawsuit, initiated by Sanborn following the loss of his family, reveals disturbing details about the roles of Fr. Duverger and then US District superior, Fr. Rostand. Fr. Duverger was the family’s confessor when the offenses allegedly happened. He is accused of maligning the husband during pastoral counseling and spending long hours alone, at night with the plaintiff’s wife, and subsequently directing the father to leave the home. In addition, now-convicted child molester Fr. Rostand spent time with Sanborn’s wife and children at the family home while Sanborn was gone, further encouraging damage to the marriage. Distressed and rightfully worried for the safety of his children, Sanborn had to instruct Fr. Rostand to stop coming to his home and hanging out with his wife and kids while their father was away. The lawsuit claims that the SSPX placed Duverger (a cleric previously under restrictions for past accusations involving women) under the authority of Rostand (a known child predator and now convicted child molester), and that the SSPX should have known they would fail to supervise one another. 
History of Rostand and Duverger
On April 4th, 2024, in Gap, France, Rostand was convicted (https://www.complicitclergy.com/2024/04/12/society-of-st-pius-x-priest-admits-to-years-of-sɛҳuąƖ-misconduct-with-minors/) of molesting seven children on scouting trips to Switzerland, France, and Spain between 2002 and 2018. 
Accusations against Fr. Duverger are well reported in Catholic media, but he has not been convicted of a crime.
For context, it is helpful to see what accusations former Church Militant journalist Christine Niles detailed against Fr. Duverger. In her spotlight investigation (https://youtu.be/IYpQxGvZqDI?feature=shared&t=295), Niles shows through witness testimony and images, that accusations against him involved the confessional, inappropriate relations with at least one soon-to-be married woman, alleged inappropriate statements to at least one 12-year-old, and selfies Duverger would send to women he was counseling at night with requests they call him “daddy” (see image below from Church Militant & Christine Niles prior work,  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYpQxGvZqDI&t=295s)Spotlight: SSPX Cover-Up Continues” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYpQxGvZqDI&t=295s)): 
 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!v_1a!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3a12d9ec-11cc-42b3-bd4b-575389fe83ec_1600x898.png)
(https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!v_1a!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3a12d9ec-11cc-42b3-bd4b-575389fe83ec_1600x898.png)

 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!v_1a!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3a12d9ec-11cc-42b3-bd4b-575389fe83ec_1600x898.png)
Niles currently has her own website, Stella Maris Media (https://stellamaris.media/). You can watch an entire video on Duverger’s checkered past made by Niles here: (minute mark 4:55:)

For counterpoint on Rostand, journalist Kennedy Hall published a defense (https://meretradition.substack.com/p/father-rostand-abuse-case-the-full) of how the SSPX handled Rostand. Rostand says that he warned the SSPX that he was a child predator in writing on four separate occasions over twenty years. Hall says that the public ought not to take Rostand at his word. Hall holds the position that because Rostand is a convicted child molester and did not produce docuмents, we should not believe this claim.
Included in the defense was an interview of SSPX Canadian District Superior Fr. Sherry by Hall. Hall and Fr. Sherry acknowledged that the 1983 Code of Canon Law is soft on crime. Although both agree the new code is problematic, neither stated that the SSPX should stop using it.
Fr. Sherry does suggest that new legislation was issued to correct the issues with the 1983 Code, but this is not entirely true. Problem canons (c. 1341 & c. 1321) are still there, nearly verbatim. Furthermore, the “new” c. 1321 now adds even greater protection for perpetrators in the 2021 update to the Code of Canon Law from Pope Francis.

LifesiteNews author and journalist Stephen Kokx published an article (https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/sspx-priest-planning-defamation-lawsuit-against-church-militant-lawyer-says/) in response to Niles' reporting. In the article, Kokx received comment from the SSPX detailing how Fr. Duverger was denied a trial (even though he requested one) and was given a softer discipline instead—consistent with the 1983 Code of Canon Law, c. 1341 and c. 1321.
Below is a screenshot of Kokx’s reporting.
 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!wYlm!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F7a7544d9-2328-4f4f-b33d-221e1b8f2691_1362x570.png)
(https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!wYlm!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F7a7544d9-2328-4f4f-b33d-221e1b8f2691_1362x570.png)

 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!wYlm!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F7a7544d9-2328-4f4f-b33d-221e1b8f2691_1362x570.png)
Impact on the Family 
Sanborn’s narrative extends beyond legal battles to personal anguish. The lawsuit states that Fr. Duverger’s influence led to false accusations of abuse against Sanborn by his wife, driven by Duverger’s manipulation. The lawsuit indicates that Fr. Duverger had a no-boundary relationship with plaintiffs' wife, involving meetings late at night at the US District House (Regina Caeli House of the SSPX). During this time, the US District House issued an exceptionally rare Church move known as a canonical separation to Sanborn, whereby they ask that a husband and wife live separately. This was especially hard for the family’s six children. Duverger’s ongoing inappropriate counseling relationship with Sanborn’s wife, following the “canonical separation” of husband and wife prescribed by the SSPX, further strained the marriage and led it to breakdown. 
Seeking Justice and Reform 
Sanborn's lawsuit aims to hold the SSPX accountable and seeks compensatory, statutory, and punitive damages for torts of fraud, malice, and failure to supervise, among other charges. This case underscores the pressing need for justice and systemic reform within the Catholic Church where it adheres to the modern code of Canon Law. The modern code explicitly seeks to “heal” predators instead of removing them from the priesthood.  Discovery will yield the full history of Rostand and Duverger as legal proceedings unfold. 
Fr. Rostand is currently in jail, serving a light, one-year sentence for his conviction of molesting seven children. Fr. Duverger is still in full ministry and traveling with a pack of children to Alaska for an adventure. 
Sanborn’s lawsuit against Fr. Rostand, Fr. Duverger, and the SSPX memorializes the SSPX’s biggest problem and brings it to circuit court for litigation. This situation involving convicted child molester Rostand and alleged womanizer Duverger demonstrates how the SSPX commitment to "the final docuмent of Vatican II” (St. John Paul II (https://www.vatican.va/content/john-paul-ii/it/speeches/1983/november/docuмents/hf_jp-ii_spe_19831121_diritto-canonico.html), 11/21/1983), the 1983 Code of Canon Law, directly places their followers at risk.
Authors note: while the 1983 Code of Canon Law publicly codified healing predators of all kinds instead of removing them from the priesthood, the practice first secretly began in 1922 with a docuмent called Crimens Sollicitationis (https://www.vatican.va/resources/resources_crimen-sollicitationis-1962_en.html), which specifically dealt with criminal pedophiles, ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖs, zoophiles, and clerics who committed sex crimes in the confessional. Crimens was in force until 2001.
To find out more about which laws and docuмents have resulted in the Catholic hierarchy retaining and restoring perpetrators to ministry, research the docuмent Crimens Sollicitationis (https://www.vatican.va/resources/resources_crimen-sollicitationis-1962_en.html), author and lawyer Kieran Tapsell (https://www.ncronline.org/news/accountability/catastrophic-institutional-failure-cataloged-australian-abuse-commission-can-be), and read our previous work here (https://catholicconfidential.substack.com/p/three-traditional-bishops-who-protect):
Three Traditional Bishops Protect The Faithful, Reject Pro-Pedophile Canon Law (substack.com) (https://catholicconfidential.substack.com/p/three-traditional-bishops-who-protect)
Below are some of the best source docuмents describing how imputability (c. 1321) decreases punishment for pedophiles to nothing, or to a penance in the 1983 Code of Canon Law (Canon Law Letter & Spirit, 1995, Canon Law Society of Great Britain and Ireland, pg. 805).
 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!e_ar!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fcc15a3b8-8697-4040-9c1a-df43cf197c66_949x1248.png)
(https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!e_ar!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fcc15a3b8-8697-4040-9c1a-df43cf197c66_949x1248.png)

 (https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!e_ar!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fcc15a3b8-8697-4040-9c1a-df43cf197c66_949x1248.png)
This portion of the same canon law commentary exploring Canon 1341 (pg. 770) details how Bishops are not to punish evildoers, if possible, with the new code.
“In a situation where a person has behaved in a reprehensible fashion, the law urges caution: penalties are to be imposed only as a last resort. When the Ordinary is made aware of such behavior, he is to seek to redress the situation by fraternal correction or by a more formal reproof, or by some other means of pastoral care. He is obliged to explore every reasonable measure whereby, without having recourse to penal action, a satisfactory pastoral resolution may be found.”
The same portion says: “Vat. II which itself introduced a new outlook and a new spirit into the penal law of the Church”, where punishment is “a last resort”.

Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 06, 2025, 01:40:18 PM
Quote
On April 4th, 2024, in Gap, France, Rostand was convicted (https://www.complicitclergy.com/2024/04/12/society-of-st-pius-x-priest-admits-to-years-of-sɛҳuąƖ-misconduct-with-minors/) of molesting seven children on scouting trips to Switzerland, France, and Spain between 2002 and 2018.

Do you know, I had almost forgotten that Fr. Rostand was convicted of sɛҳuąƖ abuse recently! That's how much coverage it got.
It made a small splash on CathInfo for a couple weeks, and that was it.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 06, 2025, 01:41:46 PM
https://www.complicitclergy.com/2024/04/12/society-of-st-pius-x-priest-admits-to-years-of-sɛҳuąƖ-misconduct-with-minors/

Society of St. Pius X Priest Admits to Years of ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ Misconduct with Minors
April 12, 2024 TagssɛҳuąƖ Abuse (https://www.complicitclergy.com/tag/sɛҳuąƖ-abuse/) from Catholic World Report (https://www.complicitclergy.com/post_publication/catholic-world-report/) by AC Wimmer (https://www.complicitclergy.com/post_columnist/ac-wimmer/)
At a hearing for a criminal trial in France, a priest of the Society of St. Pius X (SSPX) who spent six years in the U.S. has admitted to sɛҳuąƖ misconduct with French minors over a period of 15 years, local media reported Sunday.
Speaking at the criminal court in the city of Gap in southeastern France, Father Arnaud Rostand on April 4 admitted to the accusations, according (https://www.laprovence.com/article/faits-divers-justice/48322615791546/un-prete-traditionnaliste-suspecte-davoir-touche-le-sexe-de-sept-enfants-dans-les-hautes-alpes) to La Provence newspaper, saying: “I ask for forgiveness from the victims and deeply regret everything I have done.”
The 58-year-old is charged with misconduct against seven boys, often during church-related activities like scout camps in France, Spain, and Switzerland, the paper said, noting the abuse allegedly took place over a 15-year period between 2002 and 2018.
During that time, the priest held several roles, including that of a school principal in France, but also served (https://sspx.org/en/news/changing-guard-usa-5259) as U.S. district superior from 2008 to 2014. In a “farewell letter” published (http://web.archive.org/web/20140705184351/http://sspx.org/en/publications/newsletters/district-superiors-letter-may-june-2014-4069) in July 2014 but no longer linked on the current website (http://sspx.org/en/publications/newsletters/district-superiors-letter-may-june-2014-4069), he announced his departure from that role, writing he had been assigned to manage communications for the society from its general house in Menzingen, Switzerland.
In a statement published (https://laportelatine.org/actualite/communique-de-la-fraternite-sacerdotale-saint-pie-x?feed_id=3506) April 5 on its website, the SSPX expressed deep regret over the abuse.
Continue reading at Catholic World Report (https://www.catholicworldreport.com/2024/04/11/society-of-st-pius-x-priest-admits-to-years-of-sɛҳuąƖ-misconduct-with-minors/)

Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: St Giles on September 06, 2025, 02:52:54 PM
Not to downplay the significance of the SSPX adhering to bad 1983 laws or how bad the crimes are especially for priests to commit, but the fact that there are 2 different priests involved with the same family makes me wonder if Sanborn's wife was part of the cause.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 03:51:07 PM
So, I find this writeup to be extremely dishonest ... since it's blending the issue of Fr. Rostand's crimes and the allegations against Fr. Duverger (weak), with the breakup of the family.

I suspect that Sanborn is using it as additional ammunition for his lawsuit, just as women often make up allegations of abuse during divorce proceedings, etc.

So, let's put he well-covered (and poorly covered, by people like Niles, who literally made stuff up since she hates Traditional Catholicism -- and she certainly knew about Voris' recidivism into sodomy long before she finally resigned, probably only because she was a rat trying to jump ship just before it sank, and yet where was her investigation of Voris' sodomitical past and his "threat to children" etc.?) ...

but after this digression onto Niles, whom I absolutely cannot stand, who's insufferable in many ways, moreso than even Voris ...

let's try to disentangle the SSPX wrecking families, which appears to be more and more common these days, where the SSPX are playing "White Knight" and taking the side of disgruntled women and justifying many of their feminist attitudes.  Of course, the women will claim that I am justifying "abuse" ... yet they can look at the threads where I denounced those advocating corporal punishment of wives, but the issues manifested itself most egregiously in a piece of trash put out there by Father Adam Purdy SSPX in an interview given to LifeSite News.

https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/exclusive-catholic-priest-says-effeminate-men-are-the-root-problem-in-marriages

Absolutely absurd.  While Pudy denounces lack of leadership from men as the cause of most problems in marriages (I dispute that and my experience is that it's feminist attitudes from women ... that SSPX promote), so, according to Purdy, it's almost always the men who are at fault in not making sure that the "rules are followed", but then ironically in the second part of the article denounces men who think of wives "more as one to be told what to do rather than to mutually enhance each other".  Not only do I want to stick the old finger down the back of my throat with the "mutually enhance" lingo, but this gives ammunition to the feminsts who refuse to be "told what to do", as he characterizes that as an "abuse of the idea of the authority of the husband".

So, now, according to Purdy, who's engaging in a nauseatingly effeminate and obsequious "White Knight"-ing to the wives declares that a husband who, at the end of the day, expects a woman to do what she's told is abusing the notion of authority.

Obviously, this type of attitude of JUST thinking of a wife as a servant and an order-taker, taken to an extreme, can lead to tyrannnical husbands, and there are some of those out there, but after demanding that husbands show leadership and make sure rules are followed, and blaming their failure to do so on most of the trouble in familities, he completely pulls the rug out of under them and UNDERMINES their leadership, by declaring it an abuse of authority to expect the wife to do as she's told, i.e. to be obedient to her husband at the end of the day.  AT NO POINT does Purdy address the plague of women who think they cannot be told what to do.  I know "Traditional" wife, attending SSPX chapels, who constantly deride their husbands for "countermanding" them ... if they don't agree with something they've ordered, and actuall if they don't obey what they have commanded themselves.  In other words, not a few "Tradwives" expect obedience from their husbands rather than the other way around.  That's a massive plague in a society that's permeated with misandry and the derision of "toxic masculinity", etc. ... and IMO it's THE chief cause of problems in families, hands down.  Not only does Purdy not address it, but he throws gasoline onto the fire that's wrecking most families.

Only the most monstrous of men would not absolutely love, cherish, adore, and put on a pedestal, a wife who shows respect, deference, and obedience ... and who refuses to nag her husband or try to exact his compliance.  That's only natural.  Yes, there's an occasional brute that would abuse such a woman even, but they're in the very small minority.  It's just male instinct to want to protect, to care for ... it's why men get up and give up their seats to ladies, in church, on buses, and why they hold doors for them, etc.

You know, there are so many paradoxes in the spiritual life, so that those who wish to be first will be last, or those who seek their lives will lose it.  Here's another case.  I am convinced that 99% of husbands, if they had wives who were humble, respectful, deferential, never exerted themselves, nagged, bug lovingly obeyed their husband, I am convinced that 99% percent of husbands would worship the grounds such a woman walked on and, in fact, her every request they would take as a command.  In other words, they would COMMAND their husband's service by posturing themselves as THEIR servants.  Ironic.  Instead, they try to command by nagging, by disobeying ... and then get the exact opposite.

THEN ... Purdy also claims that many problems arise because women come home from work and don't understand how tough the wife has had it all day, and that she needs help with the household chores.  In other words, after the husband comes home from work, possibly exhausted himself, he's also supposed to play Mr. Mom at home.

Now, these generalizations are not only not helpful, but they're incredibly pernicious and destructive.  EACH CASE has to be evaluated independently, where in some cases, indeed, the husband is a tyrant, and perhaps doesn't help at home enough, but I've seen JUST AS MANY CASES where the husband works long days, sometimes multiple jobs, is ready to drop, and then gets a tongue-lashing from the resident feminist over how hard she's had it, doesn't get enough help around the house ... after she had sat around spending at least 6-8 hours watching TV and streaming videos.

So, in some cases, the husband/father is more at fault, but in other cases, it's mostly the wife/mother ... but Purdy takes a wrecking ball to families here by almost unilaterally blaming men, taking up the cause of the feminists, empowering and encouraging them to defy their husbands, and if there are problems in families, according to Purdy, it's nearly always the man who's at a fault.

THIS IS THE TYPE OF CRAP that SSPX are pushing what is wrecking families.  Reminds of the obsequious Novus Ordites who are always bending over backwards to over-dignify women in some kind of defensive guilt for the fact that women can't hold authority in the Church.  Same thing here, where Purdy is trying to hard to overly-idealize women, putting them up on some imaginary pedestal, that then men must bow before, thereby empowering the feminists who want to disobey and disrespect their husbands.  "You can't just tell me what to do.  Even SSPX priest says that it's an abuse of authority for you to do that.  Father Pudy here says that you can't be lazy [after working 12 hours digging ditches] but have to take on the household chores while I relax after my hard day [of watching TV and streaming videos for 6 hours]."

I'm sure this kind of crap is behind the break of Sanborn's family by SSPX.  BUT he knows that the courst would eat up Purdy's man-blaming, so he's trying to conflate that with Rostand's and Duverger's checkered pasts, since bring up crimes against children along with Catholicism could poison a jury against them.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 03:53:09 PM
Not to downplay the significance of the SSPX adhering to bad 1983 laws or how bad the crimes are especially for priests to commit, but the fact that there are 2 different priests involved with the same family makes me wonder if Sanborn's wife was part of the cause.

1000% she's part of the problem, if not THE problem.  What those who were doing were undoubtedly taking her side similar to the link above from LifeSite in the interview with Fr. Purdy SSPX.  Sadly, there's an unfortunate tendency especially for celibates to put women too high up on pedestals, and now that the SSPX have become slaves of human respect toward modern social sensibilities, on top of everything else, they're jumping on the feminist bandwagon and doing their part to denounce "toxic masculinity".
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 03:54:52 PM
I know of two cases in the same SSPX chapel, where women divorced their husbands, completely unjustly ... and were given positions at SSPX chapels, teaching at the school, being a school secretary, and other responsibilities.  Both of the husbands compained to me, shaking their heads, that SSPX is the place to go for women who want to divorce their husbands.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 04:20:22 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GvRckZGXoAAYmWd?format=jpg&name=900x900)
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: MaterDominici on September 06, 2025, 04:38:05 PM
1000% she's part of the problem, if not THE problem.  
What do you make of the alleged "relationship" between Mrs. Sanborn and Fr.D?
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 06, 2025, 04:55:41 PM
let's try to disentangle the SSPX wrecking families, which appears to be more and more common these days, where the SSPX are playing "White Knight" and taking the side of disgruntled women and justifying many of their feminist attitudes.  Of course, the women will claim that I am justifying "abuse" ... yet they can look at the threads where I denounced those advocating corporal punishment of wives, but the issues manifested itself most egregiously in a piece of trash put out there by Father Adam Purdy SSPX in an interview given to LifeSite News.

https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/exclusive-catholic-priest-says-effeminate-men-are-the-root-problem-in-marriages

Absolutely absurd.  While Pudy denounces lack of leadership from men as the cause of most problems in marriages (I dispute that and my experience is that it's feminist attitudes from women ... that SSPX promote), so, according to Purdy, it's almost always the men who are at fault in not making sure that the "rules are followed", but then ironically in the second part of the article denounces men who think of wives "more as one to be told what to do rather than to mutually enhance each other".  Not only do I want to stick the old finger down the back of my throat with the "mutually enhance" lingo, but this gives ammunition to the feminsts who refuse to be "told what to do", as he characterizes that as an "abuse of the idea of the authority of the husband".

So, now, according to Purdy, who's engaging in a nauseatingly effeminate and obsequious "White Knight"-ing to the wives declares that a husband who, at the end of the day, expects a woman to do what she's told is abusing the notion of authority.

I'm in full agreement with Ladislaus on this one.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 05:04:11 PM
No, something along the lines of what Father Purdy claims might SOMEtimes be the case, if there's one single most common problem in marriages, it's FEMINISM.

While deriding "effeminate" men, he attempts to castrate them in the very same article.  While denouncing them for not enforcing rules, he says that they shouldn't expect wives to do what they're told.  So ... how do you "enforce rules"?  You plead with your wife, and then if she happens to agree, then you get credit for enforcing rules.  But if she says, "Purdy said you can't tell me what to do.", then it's their fault?

Or, if, because the legal system has been stacked against men, and so have SSPX now, the husband just gives up and becomes passive ... since exerting himself would do nothing but result in an escalation that would give the woman fuel for charges of abuse in their impending divorce hearing.  I've known TradWives who incited their husbands to anger and, despite their being no physical abuse, would record them just so they could take it to divorce court.  Then about 3 weeks after the divorce they're shacked up with the REAL reason they made the charges of abuse against their husband, while he's forced to pay for the adulterer's presence in his own home via alimony and child support.  In the meantime, prior to the recent developments, the wife went to the Novus Ordo diocese to get the marriage annuled due to SSPX (and in some cases independent) priest not having the requisite jurisdiction.  Now of course the Novus Ordo presbyter will witness marriages, making that move harder, but the NO readily gives annulments anyway, just that it's slightly harder for them now.

I've seen this exact scenario play out from TradWives going on double-digit times now, with people I knew fairly well.  I've seen only one case where the husband filed for divorce against his wife's wishes.  In all the other cases, it was the wife filing, against the husband's wishes, and the husband fighting it the entire time.  TradWife claims abuse, in a couple cases claimed that the husband was trying to raise the children in a "cult" (characterizing Traditional Catholicism that way for additional ammunition).  In a couple of the TradWife was shacked up in short order after the divorce was finalized, and the courts added insult to injury by making the divorced husband pay for the entire adulterous arrangement.

THAT is what I'm seeing.  I do occasionally run into a guy who's very tyrannical towards his wife, but for every one of those I see, I run into dozens where the wife refuses to obey, and nags, derides, mouths off ... until she gets her way, and feels entitled to getting her way.  And what's sickening is that when the husband accuses them of being disobedient, they actually claim that they HAVE been obedient, doing everything the husband had ever asked of them.  I find myself utterly perplexed about what alternate universe they actually believe that to have been true in.  Invariably the TradWives claim abuse, brainwashing in a cult, will immediately get a restraining order on the husband for physical abuse ... simply for having administered regular (not excessive) spankings when they were called for, and that's just to set the stage for getting very favorable divorce settlement.  Before they intend to file, months before, they start making recordings of the husband getting angry with them for mouthing off, and they edit the recording to cut out the part where they instigated it.  Oh, and get this ... in one case, the TradWife who did this, claimed abuse, got restraining orders, won full custody of the children as a result, claiming that they kids were abused and in a cult, the divorced husband (a relative of mine) actually offered to keep paying her child support just so he could have custody of the kids.  In other words, she would get child support while he would actually financially support the kids, who would live with him ... i.e. where she would sponge up the child support for herself.  She was perfectly fine with that arrangement ... thereby sending her kids off to be subject to "abuse" (this guy should have filed child endangerment charges, since if you claim he was abusing them, why's she sending them over there? -- except that then the kids would have ended up with CPS).  I don't think this TradWife "mom" visited her children, at her divorced husband's place more than 2 or 3 times in about 10 years or so.  Instead she spent the husband's child support on her and her adulterous concubine, shacked up in a house that he had paid for and that she got.  But he was OK with making that sacrifice so that the children could be away from her pernicious influence.

So, this fantasy land of "effeminate men" causing most marriage problems from Fr. Purdy absolutely discredits him and the SSPX, and this attitude is likely behind what the SSPX did to Mr. Sanborn's family.

I know I've had this argument before, but this is a case where married men (married priest or even just a lay consultant) would be in a MUCH BETTER situation to do marriage counseling, etc. than these celibate priests, who in their minds perhaps liken all women to reflections of Our Lady, due to their inexperience with them, unaware of how many of them are very adept at manipulation, and so they fall victim to their wiles, where the SSPX priest undoubtedly went over to Mrs. Sanborn's house and was met with great sobbing, wailing, moaning, many tears, and gnashing of teeth ... as she describe the unspeakable abuse to which she and the children had been subject.  Then, after she sensed the priest(s) buying her version of events, she'll lighten up, acting happy and comforted, and even smiling at the priests, thanking them effusively for helping her in her dire predicament (also engaging that instinct of males to help women in distress and emotionally getting them attached to her), reinforcing their buy-in to her story.  Said women undoubtedly also practiced what even the courts have acknowledge and termed "parental alienation" by poisoning the kids against the father.  When the father is away at work, the mother can get to work programming the kids, explaining how the wicked and abusive husband and father is really the cause of all their troubles, and then convinces the children that the father abuses them.  In fact, I knew of one case where the mother smacked the kids around orders of magnitude more than the husband every spanked them ... where I personally witnessed her smacking them up with the slightest provocation, with the husband pleading for her to have a bit of restraint ... and then had the temerity not only to claim abuse of the children, but then had coached the children to make the same accusation.  Years later, the kids often feel guilty and then recant, explaining they had been told to say that by their mother, sometimes because the mother claimed that if they did not, they would end up in foster homes.  In one of the most egregious cases of "parental alienation", this actually happened to one of my brothers, whom some of you know well ... where during a visitation shortly after the divorce proceedings, my brother, who's about the most gentle individual you'd ever meet, had a restraining order filed on him and could only visit the children supervised at a police station ... and so one time my brother took some cookies for the kids.  Then, one of the kids, looked over to his mother before accepting the cookie, but was extremely nervous about accepting it.  She nodded her assent, and despite that he still appeared rather reluctant.  Now, my brother couldn't figure out what was going on.  Well, on a later visit, one of the kids spilled the beans and blurted it out that the TradWife mom (mover and shaker at an SSPX chapel after said divorce) had told them that my brother and his mom (my mom / her mother-in-law) had been poisoning their food trying to kill them.  True story.  I kid you not.  So these TradWives that Fr. Purdy puts up on a pedestal ... these preists are gullible, naive, get easily played by these master manipulators and, yes, LIARS.  Many of these women will shamelessly lie like it's going out of style, slandering and calumniating their husbands.  And the SSPX priests probably just lap it up, being manipulated by the poor woman in distress, expecting them to ride in like White Knights to save them ... and they oblige.  They should let experienced marriage counselors make assessments of situations before passing judgment.  They should also interview third parties, instead of attempting to resolve the he-said-she-said on their own, knowing that both sides are likely exaggerating culpability and one or the other side or both will lie.

I do hope that Mr. Sanborn wins the lawsuit and makes SSPX feel the pain, and force them to think twice about wrecking families.

Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 05:11:37 PM
What do you make of the alleged "relationship" between Mrs. Sanborn and Fr.D?

I can't make that one out.  It just made insinuations that Fr. D (and also Fr. R, no?) were regularly visiting her (and the children) while he was away.  I didn't see any directly allegation that there was some kind of impure relationship there, though it was heavily implied.

If you recall, one of the very first video hitpieces put out by Voris / Niles made the exact same insinuation about Father Kenneth Novak, where it spoke about his breaking up a family and visiting the wife / kids at all hours of the night.

So, I don't think it's necessary to posit an impure or physical relationship to explain these visitations, especially if the kids were also still around.  I think it's enough to explain that where the wife wanted an audience to hear her side of the story where the husband wasn't around to defend himself, so she could lay it on thick.  There may in fact have been a bit of touching involved, as part of the manipulation, where she'd grab the priest's hand or even try to get a hug in as she sobbed uncontrollably, using the physical affection to draw them in more.  Now, it certainly COULD have escalated beyond that, but I do not want to speculate since I don't feel it's NECESSARY to explain these visits ... as they could just have been planned that way so he wouldn't be around.  She may have even done things like claim that she feared for her safety if he ever found out ... as part of the manipulation also ... and so they had to sneak around, sometimes at late hours (as was alleged of Fr. Novak), since the wives would claim they had no choice but to be sneaky like that to avoid retribution from the abusive husband.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 06, 2025, 05:14:19 PM
Overall, I think that Mr. Sanborn is going to play up the checkered past of these priests in order to have a better chance of a verdict in his favor, since he knows it's his only chance.  I'm not sure that's perfectly honest either ... just that he migth feel he needs to do it in order to combat the dishonest techniques that would be used against him.  Once a woman alleges abuse ... proven or not proven ... 95% of the time it's game over for the husband/father.  It's like the old "Me Too" movement.  Then, to make it look good, before they file for divorce, they'll stage some incident and get a restraining order.  It's all part of the tactic to maximize their take in the divorce proceedings.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: FarmerWife on September 06, 2025, 07:26:02 PM
I suspect that Sanborn is using it as additional ammunition for his lawsuit, just as women often make up allegations of abuse during divorce proceedings, etc.

No different from secular women, slandering their husbands and justifying the reason for the divorce. Women are way more ruthless in court than men because they are rewarded for it. And it might lead them getting full custody of their children. 



Absolutely absurd.  While Pudy denounces lack of leadership from men as the cause of most problems in marriages (I dispute that and my experience is that it's feminist attitudes from women ... that SSPX promote), so, according to Purdy, it's almost always the men who are at fault in not making sure that the "rules are followed", but then ironically in the second part of the article denounces men who think of wives "more as one to be told what to do rather than to mutually enhance each other".  Not only do I want to stick the old finger down the back of my throat with the "mutually enhance" lingo, but this gives ammunition to the feminsts who refuse to be "told what to do", as he characterizes that as an "abuse of the idea of the authority of the husband".

We had some issues early on in our marriage and thought that seeing a priest might help. This was in the NO at the time. The priest was trying to be neutral but I could see him kind of siding with me. I didn't see this benefitting because I think I knew on the inside that I could be doing things better instead of constantly thinking my husband was in the wrong. 

Obviously, this type of attitude of JUST thinking of a wife as a servant and an order-taker, taken to an extreme, can lead to tyrannnical husbands, and there are some of those out there, but after demanding that husbands show leadership and make sure rules are followed, and blaming their failure to do so on most of the trouble in familities, he completely pulls the rug out of under them and UNDERMINES their leadership, by declaring it an abuse of authority to expect the wife to do as she's told, i.e. to be obedient to her husband at the end of the day.  AT NO POINT does Purdy address the plague of women who think they cannot be told what to do.  I know "Traditional" wife, attending SSPX chapels, who constantly deride their husbands for "countermanding" them ... if they don't agree with something they've ordered, and actuall if they don't obey what they have commanded themselves.  In other words, not a few "Tradwives" expect obedience from their husbands rather than the other way around.  That's a massive plague in a society that's permeated with misandry and the derision of "toxic masculinity", etc. ... and IMO it's THE chief cause of problems in families, hands down.  Not only does Purdy not address it, but he throws gasoline onto the fire that's wrecking most families.

Just because you dress modestly, have 10 kids, SAHM/homemaker, "traditional", doesn't mean you're not going to be a harpy. Recently, I've noticed some trad Catholic women take on the finances because they have the financial background and their husbands don't. I think there's a difference between the husband being too busy and giving his wife the job of doing it vs the wife thinking she'll be better at it. I also notice secular women doing that and the husband seems beta for the most part. Personally, I think men do a fine job managing the finances and it gives him a sense of masculinity. 
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Seraphina on September 06, 2025, 08:04:35 PM
This is the sort of thing that makes me walk into Mass at the very last minute, sit in back, and if there’s no priest hearing confessions during Mass and I might have mortal sins, I don’t go to Communion. I stay in the pew until most people are gone, pick up my stuff and make a bee line for the front door, bypassing the people having coffee and donuts. If anyone greets me, I acknowledge him briefly as I keep on walking, mumble something about running late, and burn rubber as I pull away from the curb. 
That’s called going to Mass to fulfill my obligation, but my heart isn’t in it. I have to wonder about the hearts of half or more of the laity and of the priest’s as well, distracted by the scandal, lies, gossip, detraction, and total selfishness. 
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: AnthonyPadua on September 07, 2025, 01:44:35 AM
Overall, I think that Mr. Sanborn is going to play up the checkered past of these priests in order to have a better chance of a verdict in his favor, since he knows it's his only chance.  I'm not sure that's perfectly honest either ... just that he migth feel he needs to do it in order to combat the dishonest techniques that would be used against him.  Once a woman alleges abuse ... proven or not proven ... 95% of the time it's game over for the husband/father.  It's like the old "Me Too" movement.  Then, to make it look good, before they file for divorce, they'll stage some incident and get a restraining order.  It's all part of the tactic to maximize their take in the divorce proceedings.
This is why a lot of men are reluctant of getting married nowdays or are extremely picky. Ladies the men are like cats, slowly you gotta get their attention, they will test you and sus you out to make sure there are no red flags, but if you spook them, they are gone.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: SimpleMan on September 07, 2025, 09:26:39 AM
I know of two cases in the same SSPX chapel, where women divorced their husbands, completely unjustly ... and were given positions at SSPX chapels, teaching at the school, being a school secretary, and other responsibilities.  Both of the husbands compained to me, shaking their heads, that SSPX is the place to go for women who want to divorce their husbands.
To be fair, even though that may not have been the case here, if the first marriage were ipso facto invalid due to lack of canonical form, and if the situation could not be (or should not be) rectified by convalidation or sanatio in radice, the Catholic spouse would do well to get out of it. 

 A fortiori if the first marriage were invalid due to the other spouse having a previous valid marriage.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 07, 2025, 10:17:08 AM
Or, if, because the legal system has been stacked against men, and so have SSPX now, the husband just gives up and becomes passive ... since exerting himself would do nothing but result in an escalation that would give the woman fuel for charges of abuse in their impending divorce hearing.  I've known TradWives who incited their husbands to anger and, despite their being no physical abuse, would record them just so they could take it to divorce court.  Then about 3 weeks after the divorce they're shacked up with the REAL reason they made the charges of abuse against their husband, while he's forced to pay for the adulterer's presence in his own home via alimony and child support.  In the meantime, prior to the recent developments, the wife went to the Novus Ordo diocese to get the marriage annuled due to SSPX (and in some cases independent) priest not having the requisite jurisdiction.  Now of course the Novus Ordo presbyter will witness marriages, making that move harder, but the NO readily gives annulments anyway, just that it's slightly harder for them now.

I've seen this exact scenario play out from TradWives going on double-digit times now, with people I knew fairly well.  I've seen only one case where the husband filed for divorce against his wife's wishes.  In all the other cases, it was the wife filing, against the husband's wishes, and the husband fighting it the entire time.  TradWife claims abuse, in a couple cases claimed that the husband was trying to raise the children in a "cult" (characterizing Traditional Catholicism that way for additional ammunition).  In a couple of the TradWife was shacked up in short order after the divorce was finalized, and the courts added insult to injury by making the divorced husband pay for the entire adulterous arrangement.

How do these women delude themselves every day that they are good Catholics? How do they hold out ANY hope of EVER seeing Heaven someday?
It boggles the mind.
Do they think warming the pews at a "Tridentine Mass" for an hour once a week is some kind of easy ticket to Heaven?
Do they think, like the Jews, that they can cheat God, getting "annulments" stamped by the Novus Ordo and God will be all pleased with their evil machinations and behavior?

Here is an appropriate reading from Scripture, speaking about the insatiable appetite of some wicked and lusty women for sex:
(Proverbs chapter 30)

 (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=15-#x)
Quote
15  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=15-#x)The horseleech hath two daughters that say: Bring, bring. There are three things that never are satisfied, and the fourth never saith: It is enough.
[15] "The horseleech": Concupiscence, which hath two daughters that are never satisfied, viz., lust and avarice.

16  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=16-#x)Hell, and the mouth of the womb, and the earth which is not satisfied with water: and the fire never saith: It is enough  [Proverbs 30:16] (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=16#)
...
18  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=18-#x)Three things are hard to me, and the fourth I am utterly ignorant of. 19  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=19-#x)The way of an eagle in the air, the way of a serpent upon a rock, the way of a ship in the midst of the sea, and the way of a man in youth. 20  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=20-#x)Such is also the way of an adulterous woman, who eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith: I have done no evil.
21  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=21-#x)By three things the earth is disturbed, and the fourth it cannot bear: 22  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=22-#x)By a slave when he reigneth: by a fool when he is filled with meat: 23  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=23-#x)By an odious woman when she is married: and by a bondwoman when she is heir to her mistress.


Particularly this part:

 (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=18-#x)
Quote
18  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=18-#x)Three things are hard to me, and the fourth I am utterly ignorant of. 19  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=19-#x)The way of an eagle in the air, the way of a serpent upon a rock, the way of a ship in the midst of the sea, and the way of a man in youth. 20  (https://drbo.org/cgi-bin/d?b=drb&bk=22&ch=30&l=20-#x)Such is also the way of an adulterous woman, who eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith: I have done no evil.
I know, right? I'm with you on this, Solomon. I don't understand it either.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Pax Vobis on September 07, 2025, 11:01:06 AM
No, something along the lines of what Father Purdy claims might SOMEtimes be the case, if there's one single most common problem in marriages, it's FEMINISM.

While deriding "effeminate" men, he attempts to castrate them in the very same article.  While denouncing them for not enforcing rules, he says that they shouldn't expect wives to do what they're told.  So ... how do you "enforce rules"?  You plead with your wife, and then if she happens to agree, then you get credit for enforcing rules.  But if she says, "Purdy said you can't tell me what to do.", then it's their fault?

Or, if, because the legal system has been stacked against men, and so have SSPX now, the husband just gives up and becomes passive ... since exerting himself would do nothing but result in an escalation that would give the woman fuel for charges of abuse in their impending divorce hearing.  I've known TradWives who incited their husbands to anger and, despite their being no physical abuse, would record them just so they could take it to divorce court.  Then about 3 weeks after the divorce they're shacked up with the REAL reason they made the charges of abuse against their husband, while he's forced to pay for the adulterer's presence in his own home via alimony and child support.  In the meantime, prior to the recent developments, the wife went to the Novus Ordo diocese to get the marriage annuled due to SSPX (and in some cases independent) priest not having the requisite jurisdiction.  Now of course the Novus Ordo presbyter will witness marriages, making that move harder, but the NO readily gives annulments anyway, just that it's slightly harder for them now.

I've seen this exact scenario play out from TradWives going on double-digit times now, with people I knew fairly well.  I've seen only one case where the husband filed for divorce against his wife's wishes.  In all the other cases, it was the wife filing, against the husband's wishes, and the husband fighting it the entire time.  TradWife claims abuse, in a couple cases claimed that the husband was trying to raise the children in a "cult" (characterizing Traditional Catholicism that way for additional ammunition).  In a couple of the TradWife was shacked up in short order after the divorce was finalized, and the courts added insult to injury by making the divorced husband pay for the entire adulterous arrangement.

THAT is what I'm seeing.  I do occasionally run into a guy who's very tyrannical towards his wife, but for every one of those I see, I run into dozens where the wife refuses to obey, and nags, derides, mouths off ... until she gets her way, and feels entitled to getting her way.  And what's sickening is that when the husband accuses them of being disobedient, they actually claim that they HAVE been obedient, doing everything the husband had ever asked of them.  I find myself utterly perplexed about what alternate universe they actually believe that to have been true in.  Invariably the TradWives claim abuse, brainwashing in a cult, will immediately get a restraining order on the husband for physical abuse ... simply for having administered regular (not excessive) spankings when they were called for, and that's just to set the stage for getting very favorable divorce settlement.  Before they intend to file, months before, they start making recordings of the husband getting angry with them for mouthing off, and they edit the recording to cut out the part where they instigated it.  Oh, and get this ... in one case, the TradWife who did this, claimed abuse, got restraining orders, won full custody of the children as a result, claiming that they kids were abused and in a cult, the divorced husband (a relative of mine) actually offered to keep paying her child support just so he could have custody of the kids.  In other words, she would get child support while he would actually financially support the kids, who would live with him ... i.e. where she would sponge up the child support for herself.  She was perfectly fine with that arrangement ... thereby sending her kids off to be subject to "abuse" (this guy should have filed child endangerment charges, since if you claim he was abusing them, why's she sending them over there? -- except that then the kids would have ended up with CPS).  I don't think this TradWife "mom" visited her children, at her divorced husband's place more than 2 or 3 times in about 10 years or so.  Instead she spent the husband's child support on her and her adulterous concubine, shacked up in a house that he had paid for and that she got.  But he was OK with making that sacrifice so that the children could be away from her pernicious influence.

So, this fantasy land of "effeminate men" causing most marriage problems from Fr. Purdy absolutely discredits him and the SSPX, and this attitude is likely behind what the SSPX did to Mr. Sanborn's family.

I know I've had this argument before, but this is a case where married men (married priest or even just a lay consultant) would be in a MUCH BETTER situation to do marriage counseling, etc. than these celibate priests, who in their minds perhaps liken all women to reflections of Our Lady, due to their inexperience with them, unaware of how many of them are very adept at manipulation, and so they fall victim to their wiles, where the SSPX priest undoubtedly went over to Mrs. Sanborn's house and was met with great sobbing, wailing, moaning, many tears, and gnashing of teeth ... as she describe the unspeakable abuse to which she and the children had been subject.  Then, after she sensed the priest(s) buying her version of events, she'll lighten up, acting happy and comforted, and even smiling at the priests, thanking them effusively for helping her in her dire predicament (also engaging that instinct of males to help women in distress and emotionally getting them attached to her), reinforcing their buy-in to her story.  Said women undoubtedly also practiced what even the courts have acknowledge and termed "parental alienation" by poisoning the kids against the father.  When the father is away at work, the mother can get to work programming the kids, explaining how the wicked and abusive husband and father is really the cause of all their troubles, and then convinces the children that the father abuses them.  In fact, I knew of one case where the mother smacked the kids around orders of magnitude more than the husband every spanked them ... where I personally witnessed her smacking them up with the slightest provocation, with the husband pleading for her to have a bit of restraint ... and then had the temerity not only to claim abuse of the children, but then had coached the children to make the same accusation.  Years later, the kids often feel guilty and then recant, explaining they had been told to say that by their mother, sometimes because the mother claimed that if they did not, they would end up in foster homes.  In one of the most egregious cases of "parental alienation", this actually happened to one of my brothers, whom some of you know well ... where during a visitation shortly after the divorce proceedings, my brother, who's about the most gentle individual you'd ever meet, had a restraining order filed on him and could only visit the children supervised at a police station ... and so one time my brother took some cookies for the kids.  Then, one of the kids, looked over to his mother before accepting the cookie, but was extremely nervous about accepting it.  She nodded her assent, and despite that he still appeared rather reluctant.  Now, my brother couldn't figure out what was going on.  Well, on a later visit, one of the kids spilled the beans and blurted it out that the TradWife mom (mover and shaker at an SSPX chapel after said divorce) had told them that my brother and his mom (my mom / her mother-in-law) had been poisoning their food trying to kill them.  True story.  I kid you not.  So these TradWives that Fr. Purdy puts up on a pedestal ... these preists are gullible, naive, get easily played by these master manipulators and, yes, LIARS.  Many of these women will shamelessly lie like it's going out of style, slandering and calumniating their husbands.  And the SSPX priests probably just lap it up, being manipulated by the poor woman in distress, expecting them to ride in like White Knights to save them ... and they oblige.  They should let experienced marriage counselors make assessments of situations before passing judgment.  They should also interview third parties, instead of attempting to resolve the he-said-she-said on their own, knowing that both sides are likely exaggerating culpability and one or the other side or both will lie.

I do hope that Mr. Sanborn wins the lawsuit and makes SSPX feel the pain, and force them to think twice about wrecking families.
Feminism is as bad as wokeism.  It’s truly a psychological problem which many, many women have.  And it’s only getting worse.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Matthew on September 07, 2025, 11:59:46 AM
Not only are the women (that Ladislaus refers to, who divorced their husbands) evil and trying to fool God that they aren't evil, who do they think they're kidding?

Do none of them have any children? Don't you think the children will be affected by this horrible example?

Just for starters, it's difficult to look at your children with a straight face and say you love them, while hating/wronging their father, WHO IS HALF OF WHO THEY ARE.

When a mother rejects the father, or the father rejects the mother, you're rejecting HALF OF YOUR KIDS SUBSTANCE. Remember that. They are a lot like BOTH PARENTS. And don't think the kids don't know that, at least deep down. Regardless of how "amicable" the divorce/separation was. If you could stand them at all, you'd still be together. And you're not. So you are annoyed/disgusted/whatever by your ex-spouse -- which means those children who have many of the same looks, mannerisms, habits, personality, strengths/weaknesses, etc. are going to be equally annoying, disgusting, etc.

Again, kids understand this IMPLICITLY without being able to put it into words. But it's why divorce is forbidden by God. Because it ruins children's lives. It causes depression, under-achievement, daddy issues, and a countless train of other evils.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Giovanni Berto on September 07, 2025, 12:47:46 PM
Not only are the women (that Ladislaus refers to, who divorced their husbands) evil and trying to fool God that they aren't evil, who do they think they're kidding?

Do none of them have any children? Don't you think the children will be affected by this horrible example?

Just for starters, it's difficult to look at your children with a straight face and say you love them, while hating/wronging their father, WHO IS HALF OF WHO THEY ARE.

When a mother rejects the father, or the father rejects the mother, you're rejecting HALF OF YOUR KIDS SUBSTANCE. Remember that. They are a lot like BOTH PARENTS. And don't think the kids don't know that, at least deep down. Regardless of how "amicable" the divorce/separation was. If you could stand them at all, you'd still be together. And you're not. So you are annoyed/disgusted/whatever by your ex-spouse -- which means those children who have many of the same looks, mannerisms, habits, personality, strengths/weaknesses, etc. are going to be equally annoying, disgusting, etc.

Again, kids understand this IMPLICITLY without being able to put it into words. But it's why divorce is forbidden by God. Because it ruins children's lives. It causes depression, under-achievement, daddy issues, and a countless train of other evils.

Excluding extreme cases, people who divorce don't care for their children. If they did, they would not divorce.

Divorce hits children the hardest, but the divorcees are also affected. How many practice continence for the rest of their lives? Chances are that they will go into adultery and die in this sad state.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: FarmerWife on September 07, 2025, 01:39:40 PM
Also, lawyers will prolong the divorce court process for as much as possible so they can rake in that dough. The whole system is designed to benefit the system. It’s not good to involve the government in your intimate, private life like this. Alimony/child support can also be taxed in some places. 

If the divorce wasn’t amicable, the children end up getting the one-sided version of why the marriage ended up broken, particularly from the mom. “Your dad was abusive to me. He was a deadbeat”, etc. and if they are very young, can have that perspective of their dad being a loser. Oh and he doesn’t even get them full-time. 
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: AnthonyPadua on September 07, 2025, 04:15:33 PM
This is why a lot of men are reluctant of getting married nowdays or are extremely picky. Ladies the men are like cats, slowly you gotta get their attention, they will test you and sus you out to make sure there are no red flags, but if you spook them, they are gone.
For however down voted me. Lions are still cats. A wise man is going to be very prudent in picking a wife. He's seen how men are easily destroyed by modern courts and does not want his labour to be stolen from him.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Ladislaus on September 07, 2025, 04:24:19 PM
For however down voted me. Lions are still cats. A wise man is going to be very prudent in picking a wife. He's seen how men are easily destroyed by modern courts and does not want his labour to be stolen from him.

So, even more than their labors ... the souls of their children.  I mentioned that relative of mine who paid the full child support and alimony ... just so he could keep the children with him and continue raising them in the faith, instead of under the same roof with that woman and her adulterous concubine.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Incredulous on September 08, 2025, 10:21:21 AM
Effeminate men?

Father Rostand needs a good last Confession and…

(https://cdn.theculturetrip.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/great-white-shark--courtesy-of-tom-smith.jpg)
to walk the plank.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: TheRealMcCoy on September 08, 2025, 10:37:05 AM
Having witnessed the behavior of Rostand and Duverger years ago at a Mission Cataldo pilgrimage, none of the allegations shock me.  Rather, one could have predicted it.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Twice dyed on January 06, 2026, 12:37:44 PM
I have seen Missouri court filings stating SSPX priest Father Duverger is living in Florida with an 18 year old girl. Father Pagliarani is visiting Sanford these days. What is going on with Sanford Fl SSPX?

https://www.courts.mo.gov/cnet/cases/newHeader.do?inputVO.caseNumber=24AE-CC00184&inputVO.courtId=SMPDB0001_CT06#docket

https://www.courts.mo.gov/casenet/cases/newHeader.do?inputVO.caseNumber=24AE-CC00184&inputVO.courtId=SMPDB0001_CT06&inputVO.isTicket=false#event

Friday, Jan 9, 2026 Court hearing resumes. Is anyone (CInfo) free to assist? and give an un-official account?

24AE-CC00184 - STEPHEN SANBORN V FATHER PIERRE DUVERGER ET AL (E-CASE)

If an event is continued or cancelled it will not appear on this calendar.
FRIDAY, JANUARY 9, 2026

Judge/Commissioner: MYLES A PERRY
Setting:
Time: 10:00 AM
Day: 1 OF 1

Location: Platte
Room: DIVISION 6 COURT ROOM
Event: Motion Hearing
Address: 415 3RD STREET SUITE 5 PLATTE CITY MO
Event Text: DEF MOTION TO DISMISS


********************
Happy Feast of the Epiphany, 2026 AD.


Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: TheRealMcCoy on January 06, 2026, 02:19:19 PM
I read every single filing on the court website.  The plaintiff has attempted for almost a year to serve Fr Duverger and failed because false addresses were provided by "someone".  Either the plaintiff's counsel is incompetent or the SSPX is hiding that priest, utilizing faithful in the most despicable manner.  This indeed is a scandal that should completely shutter every SSPX chapel in the US. Not to mention what happened at Post Falls...
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: MiracleOfTheSun on January 06, 2026, 02:26:33 PM
I read every single filing on the court website.  The plaintiff has attempted for almost a year to serve Fr Duverger and failed because false addresses were provided by "someone".  Either the plaintiff's counsel is incompetent or the SSPX is hiding that priest, utilizing faithful in the most despicable manner.  This indeed is a scandal that should completely shutter every SSPX chapel in the US. Not to mention what happened at Post Falls...

I've heard of lawyers being scuмbags and unscrupulous but rarely incompetent which, sadly, likely, points the finger at +Fillet and company.  But at this point can anyone seriously be surprised?  What a sad turn.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Seraphina on January 06, 2026, 03:40:24 PM
This entire affair is sordid. There’s no other word for it. 

I thank God for depriving me of a religious vocation, marriage, husband, and motherhood.  

The life of loner, misfit, and reject is far better than the drama, “As The SSPX Turns.” 
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Pax24 on January 08, 2026, 01:08:10 PM
No, something along the lines of what Father Purdy claims might SOMEtimes be the case, if there's one single most common problem in marriages, it's FEMINISM....

Everything you said is 100% inline with my experience.  It's a plague.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Bl Alojzije Stepinac on January 10, 2026, 06:45:25 AM
This entire affair is sordid. There’s no other word for it.

I thank God for depriving me of a religious vocation, marriage, husband, and motherhood. 

The life of loner, misfit, and reject is far better than the drama, “As The SSPX Turns.”
As I married man, I couldn't agree more. I have had characteristics of a loner since I was in elementary school. I should have never married. I now understand it better than ever, as a Traditional Catholic. Maybe I don't want to carry this cross, someone has a heavier cross than me for sure. But when I see how my mother, and aunt (wife of father's brother) still obeys amd respects her husband, I almost never experience that with my wife. And they still attend NO mass, go sometimes on pilgrimages, pray the rosary everyday. My mother in law also was submissive but had a also wrong choice of a husband. She suffered a lot from him (smoking and alcohol addiction, etc.) and his mother. She had to work 12-15 hours a day in a franciscian monestary and cleaning the camps, apartments. And my wife (her daughter) was left on her own most of the day, or with her father who was at home more than her mother. It's so unnatural and also bad company in a small village had to do dmaage and it did. She became antisubmissive, "anticross", very hard to acceept unjustice, ofter swearing, using bad language, yelling, disobeying, even stealing my card and spending my money when she was unemployed. I just can't realize still why I haven't divorced from her when we still haven't had a child.....

This story about SSPX priests in Florida is very bad example and scandalous. I sometimes think that "trad wife" would be different than mine, but clearly that is not the case. Feminism and globalization, internet made it destructive almost everywhere excepts some tribes maybe. 


Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Giovanni Berto on January 10, 2026, 04:24:52 PM
As I married man, I couldn't agree more. I have had characteristics of a loner since I was in elementary school. I should have never married. I now understand it better than ever, as a Traditional Catholic. Maybe I don't want to carry this cross, someone has a heavier cross than me for sure. But when I see how my mother, and aunt (wife of father's brother) still obeys amd respects her husband, I almost never experience that with my wife. And they still attend NO mass, go sometimes on pilgrimages, pray the rosary everyday. My mother in law also was submissive but had a also wrong choice of a husband. She suffered a lot from him (smoking and alcohol addiction, etc.) and his mother. She had to work 12-15 hours a day in a franciscian monestary and cleaning the camps, apartments. And my wife (her daughter) was left on her own most of the day, or with her father who was at home more than her mother. It's so unnatural and also bad company in a small village had to do dmaage and it did. She became antisubmissive, "anticross", very hard to acceept unjustice, ofter swearing, using bad language, yelling, disobeying, even stealing my card and spending my money when she was unemployed. I just can't realize still why I haven't divorced from her when we still haven't had a child.....

This story about SSPX priests in Florida is very bad example and scandalous. I sometimes think that "trad wife" would be different than mine, but clearly that is not the case. Feminism and globalization, internet made it destructive almost everywhere excepts some tribes maybe.

If you are validly married, you cannot divorce your wife, no matter how much of a pain she is. There are many people who suffer due to bad marriages. You are not alone. Good wives are the exception these days, even among "Trads", I dare to say.

I believe that a part of what you say is right, but another part of it might be a temptation from the Devil, for you to think that you would be better elsewhere.

If I am not mistaken, you have just have your first child less than a year ago, right? Even if your wife is not the best, now is the time to make the best out of your marriage, for the healthy development of your child. You have to be a good husband and to be a good father. You have to give the child a peaceful home, and avoid fights. Easier said than done, I know, but don't be disheartened.
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Seraphina on January 10, 2026, 05:53:38 PM
I read every single filing on the court website.  The plaintiff has attempted for almost a year to serve Fr Duverger and failed because false addresses were provided by "someone".  Either the plaintiff's counsel is incompetent or the SSPX is hiding that priest, utilizing faithful in the most despicable manner.  This indeed is a scandal that should completely shutter every SSPX chapel in the US. Not to mention what happened at Post Falls...
I agree many SSPX chapels are a mess, but shutting down every single SSPX chapel in the USA is a bit extreme!  Think of all the souls that rely on SSPX for Mass and Sacraments. Think of all the souls that will either go back to the novus ordo, most of which I’ve come to believe have invalid priests therefore invalid sacraments. Many will cease to practice the Faith, go out into the world, or even become Protestant. Thousands of souls could be lost. In many places, the SSPX is the only option. Sanford, N. Carolina, and Post Falls (was it a chapel or a school?) have had now open scandals. What about the probable majority of people NOT involved in any way, and chapels where scandals have NOT occurred?  They should all be punished? Christ warned that there will be scandals, and woe to those who cause them. They should be fitted with millstone necklaces and dumped into the sea. He didn’t say their victims should be punished! It is also true that the victims of scandals will suffer, but they have the choice of whether to take scandal and let it destroy their souls, lose the Faith, or to forgive and go on, however difficult that may be. Depending upon the circuмstances, that may mean having to switch chapels, accept the loss of friendships, endure a fractured family, lose one’s job and suffer poverty, move away, or go “home alone.” Why would anyone WANT innocent parties to suffer for the sins of a few evil doers? God may will it as a test or strengthening, but that is not something an individual without proper authority may rightfully impose upon thousands of souls.
Without going into detail, I was sinned against by someone in authority in the Church. That same person sinned against dozens of others, and in a manner much worse than with me. The person is presently in prison for his crimes. Should the victims along with about 350 completely innocent, ignorant at the time of the crimes be deprived of the Mass and Sacraments? Forced to move away, lose jobs, be estranged from families, their spouse, children? Forced to stay “home alone?” If it can be prevented, it is not right! 
Speaking only for myself, I do not allow the sins of that person to deprive me of salvation. At present, I pity him and pray that he save his soul. I also am glad that earthly justice is being carried out. 
Corporate sin certainly exists. God does judge and punish entire nations. But He justly determines when and how this is done, while dealing with every individual soul that no injustice occurs. Other times, God specifically punishes individual souls without inflicting pain on his entire family, city, or nation. 
If I misbehaved as a child, let’s say, a real incident on our summer vacation in our RV. I  deliberately provoked my mother by using four-letter words. I received a mouthful of Palmolive dish soap and was sent to my rack. When my father returned, he got out the belt. I still had to apologize to my mother and siblings who heard it and were upset by the whole affair. My father didn’t give mom and siblings a taste of Palmolive and beat their hides! That would be most unjust!  They got to eat dinner, play this board game we had of four layer Tic-Tac-Toe. I did not get dinner or play a game. All I got was to listen to everyone else have fun, smell the tuna and mandarin curry casserole from behind the curtain and not come out until morning. 
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Bl Alojzije Stepinac on January 13, 2026, 03:40:42 AM
If you are validly married, you cannot divorce your wife, no matter how much of a pain she is. There are many people who suffer due to bad marriages. You are not alone. Good wives are the exception these days, even among "Trads", I dare to say.

I believe that a part of what you say is right, but another part of it might be a temptation from the Devil, for you to think that you would be better elsewhere.

If I am not mistaken, you have just have your first child less than a year ago, right? Even if your wife is not the best, now is the time to make the best out of your marriage, for the healthy development of your child. You have to be a good husband and to be a good father. You have to give the child a peaceful home, and avoid fights. Easier said than done, I know, but don't be disheartened.
Thank you Giovanni Berto for encouraging words, I feel weak for even writing this personal details of my family life. I realise now that my complaining to anyone didn't produce any good only for the moment for me. I opened up to some of my family members about it, and it only brought more problems, conflicts. At the same time, it was unbearable for me to have nobody to talk about it, like true Catholic faith, Tradition, etc.

I have a baby daughter which in a few days will be 2 years and 5 months old. I love her more than myself and I know my wife also loves her. She sometimes is more harsh towards her than me, but for a good reason. I remember my mom used to tell that her mother (born in 1920.) was raised that way that when her husband comes in house, she would stand up every time. But for a 40-50 years already it has started to look ridiculous, humiliating for women. How so many things have changed. My late mother's mother was a saintly, humble, obedient women. Only one of my aunts is similar to her, she only knows Novus ordo religion but is quiet, humble, always stayed at home with many children. She even helped to watch and raise more than 5-6 grandchildren while her daughters and sons are at work. It's so rare and hard to comprehend, even more because she was from a very wealthy family (her dad was a rich lawyer, worked in Germany for years) and she married to my good uncle when he returned from military service.

Today that type of love, sacrifice, commitment is unimaginable, in real life and on the Internet. 

I need to embrace my cross with love, which I have a difficulty, it's human nature. But Our Lord Jesus Christ suffered innocently, as did Blessed Virgin Mary. They both did only God's will, and suffered more than we will ever will if we don't end up in Hell. Maybe Jesus suffered more than sinners in Hell shall suffer...that thought should make us all humble and stop complaining, or the sufferings of martyrs in the early Church....horrific. 

People should stop using secular or Church, I mean, Novus Ordo courts because rarely they make judgements based on justice and Catholic moral laws. They are mostly infiltrated by the freemasons, (neo)communists, globalists.
So sad what SSPX has been tolerating, similar like the modernists. Especially when they use Code of Canon law 1983. when suites them..."recognize and resist", sometimes "recognize and make use of it when it suits us"...
Title: Re: Sanford SSPX scandal
Post by: Giovanni Berto on January 13, 2026, 09:29:10 PM
Thank you Giovanni Berto for encouraging words, I feel weak for even writing this personal details of my family life. I realise now that my complaining to anyone didn't produce any good only for the moment for me. I opened up to some of my family members about it, and it only brought more problems, conflicts. At the same time, it was unbearable for me to have nobody to talk about it, like true Catholic faith, Tradition, etc.

I have a baby daughter which in a few days will be 2 years and 5 months old. I love her more than myself and I know my wife also loves her. She sometimes is more harsh towards her than me, but for a good reason. I remember my mom used to tell that her mother (born in 1920.) was raised that way that when her husband comes in house, she would stand up every time. But for a 40-50 years already it has started to look ridiculous, humiliating for women. How so many things have changed. My late mother's mother was a saintly, humble, obedient women. Only one of my aunts is similar to her, she only knows Novus ordo religion but is quiet, humble, always stayed at home with many children. She even helped to watch and raise more than 5-6 grandchildren while her daughters and sons are at work. It's so rare and hard to comprehend, even more because she was from a very wealthy family (her dad was a rich lawyer, worked in Germany for years) and she married to my good uncle when he returned from military service.

Today that type of love, sacrifice, commitment is unimaginable, in real life and on the Internet.

I need to embrace my cross with love, which I have a difficulty, it's human nature. But Our Lord Jesus Christ suffered innocently, as did Blessed Virgin Mary. They both did only God's will, and suffered more than we will ever will if we don't end up in Hell. Maybe Jesus suffered more than sinners in Hell shall suffer...that thought should make us all humble and stop complaining, or the sufferings of martyrs in the early Church....horrific.

People should stop using secular or Church, I mean, Novus Ordo courts because rarely they make judgements based on justice and Catholic moral laws. They are mostly infiltrated by the freemasons, (neo)communists, globalists.
So sad what SSPX has been tolerating, similar like the modernists. Especially when they use Code of Canon law 1983. when suites them..."recognize and resist", sometimes "recognize and make use of it when it suits us"...

Yes. Sometimes we need to talk to somebody, only to realize later that it was not only useless but dangerous, depending on who we talk to. If you need to open up to somebody, I advise you to talk to somebody who is not in any way involved with your family. A friend, even a psychologist might be a good option, if you can find a decent one.

Past generations had many virtues that we don't have anymore, but we have to make the best out of what is given us. There's a reason that we are living now and not 500 years ago. God wants us to be here now, even if things are so bad. He will not abandon us if we trust Him.

In my opinion, you should stay away from the SSPX for anything but the sacraments. Even then, make sure that your priest was validly ordained. This has become a bigger problem more recently.