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I know I shouldn't bother, since Fr. Pfeiffer's own words can hardly be topped. It's hard to satirize insanity.

However, I just HAD to go through and translate some of the stuff to be more easy to understand. I didn't stretch THE MEANING of anything he said -- just said it more clearly and to-the-point.

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Dear Bishop Williamson,

Allow me to call you several names. I hate your guts.

You have been ignoring me. You are going to hell. Allow me to lie and exaggerate about how you received me when I showed up unannounced at your home. Did I mention you're going to hell?

I have more seminarians than Fr. Chazal. Nyah nyah nyah-nyah-nyah. I deserve your services more than Fr. Chazal.

You are (Original text: a pusillanimous, childish,  English Brat, who has a taste for Unfinished Opera Houses, Unfinished lives of English Poets, and unfinished business as regards the kingdom of God, and unfinished Symponies of the most forgettable nauseating type.)

You and Fr. Chazal are wicked. You and your whole life make me sick.

My seminary gives an awesome formation. Who needs professors, curriculum, or regularity of life? Those things are highly overrated.
Did I mention that you're going to hell for eternity?

(More original text: Do your duty before you die, and if possible before your 80th birthday bash. I hate to spoil the surprise but they tell me in Kansas that they are preparing a nice birthday bash for you. Bring balloons, tinsel, and some nice Strawberry fields forever music along and enjoy your last brief party before a long reckoning.)

You are also a communist infiltrator. But personally I don't give a damn whether you are a commie son of a bitch or not. What is the racial epithet for a British person? I'm a bit rusty. If you were black I'd know exactly what to call you. Starts with N and rhymes with "trigger". My dad would do the same. We both have no use for you tea-drinking, crooked-teeth limey b****rds. Allow me to say "shit" in a clever manner by using Latin (which I was never that good at). But my Latin is better than yours.

Allow me to be silly and talk about trading bishops for seminarians. But I consider your services to be worthless anyhow. I don't know why I'm even writing to you. Maybe I'm insane?

You have done so much evil.

But all will be forgiven and overlooked if you consecrate me a bishop and ordain my seminarians. Before you go to hell, that is. (I assume that hell-bound commie infiltrators convey valid orders?) If you consecrate me a bishop, it will wipe out all the evils you have ever done, and you will be like the Good Thief who only did one good thing right at the end of his life.

Insanely yours,

Fr. Joseph Pfeiifer (I can't even spell my own name! hahaha)
Spewer of Sh**

OK, did he actually HIMSELF write "Composer of Compost" beneath his name?  Did he typo his own name?  Is this letter 100% genuine and original or has it been altered?

If even 90% of this is real, Father Pfeiffer needs  

... and possibly the intervention of an Exorcist.

As I said at the beginning, before I hit CTRL-V and pasted in the e-mail in its entirety:

I am pasting this in verbatim. Not a single letter or space has been added or changed. I got this e-mail from Fr. Chazal.   -Matthew

The email in the OP is 100% as I received it. Fr. Chazal forwarded it to me.