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After 50 years of life on this earth I personally know of no really happy marriages, honestly.

The ones I know are valiant warriors who are bearing it out despite the personal pain and suffering it causes.

There may be exceptions out there of course, but I'm only talking from personal experience.

Many children bring as many sorrows and sufferings as they bring earthly joys even in the best of circuмstances.

This is not to say that marriage and childbearing are not gifts from God with many joys,

but they are HIGHLY overrated as providers for happiness.

It's common for a spouse to feel acute loneliness in the marriage bed

and for a parent to feel acute loneliness in their living room surrounded by their family

simply because they do not share the same faith (and goals for sanctity)

even if they attend the same church.


This phenomena would be very hard for a single person to imagine

but it is real nonetheless and probably experienced by many at your chapel.


Some of the advantages to single life include:

the ability to think clearly because of a life of silence.


Often in a large family you are not able to complete a sentence much less have a moment of silence to complete a personal thought.


This makes it difficult to think through and process emotions as they arise and respond with reason and grace

much less contemplate and grow in spiritual matters.



There is so much more that can be said...


The "grass is always greener" is very, very true!

After 50 years of life on this earth I personally know of no really happy marriages, honestly.

The ones I know are valiant warriors who are bearing it out despite the personal pain and suffering it causes.

There may be exceptions out there of course, but I'm only talking from personal experience.

Many children bring as many sorrows and sufferings as they bring earthly joys even in the best of circuмstances.

This is not to say that marriage and childbearing are not gifts from God with many joys,

but they are HIGHLY overrated as providers for happiness.

It's common for a spouse to feel acute loneliness in the marriage bed

and for a parent to feel acute loneliness in their living room surrounded by their family

simply because they do not share the same faith (and goals for sanctity)

even if they attend the same church.


This phenomena would be very hard for a single person to imagine

but it is real nonetheless and probably experienced by many at your chapel.


Some of the advantages to single life include:

the ability to think clearly because of a life of silence.


Often in a large family you are not able to complete a sentence much less have a moment of silence to complete a personal thought.


This makes it difficult to think through and process emotions as they arise and respond with reason and grace

much less contemplate and grow in spiritual matters.



There is so much more that can be said...


The "grass is always greener" is very, very true!

Great post, and absolutely true!!!!

I'm in my mid-50s with three adult children.  I have no spouse, no extended family connections, no friends.  Thankfully I'm an introvert so I don't get lonely but every once in a blue moon I get bored.  Then I'll just take on a new interest.  Right now my focus is on updating a house I just bought.  I'm also looking to take a second remote IT job so I can stack coins.  I keep myself busy with work and hobbies.  I agree with the statement that marriage is overrated as a source of personal happiness.  People get married thinking it will be like prom night that lasts 50 years but really it's like 50 years with your parents.  Not much different but maybe less freedom. 

Fr. Girouard once told me "marriage is a school of virtue" and with that I think we can all agree. 

Rather than stacking coins and keeping busy with hobbies, I'd use that extra income from a second job to help the poor at church repair/maintain their house, improve their home garden, cover car maintenance and help them to afford to travel to mass more often than just on sunday, if there's mass available on other days. There's not enough community cooperation and sharing of possessions these days as there was mentioned in the Acts of the Apostles.