Author Topic: We are losing our disabled daughter due to our faith (Read 2875 times)

Robin · « **on:** February 03, 2017, 12:10:32 AM »

our 18 yo disabled daughter who has been a Traditional Catholic is being taken away from us by some of our adult children and a local mental health group. Our daughter was the victim of a police raid on our son..while she was disabled at 16 when this happened she was nowhere near the way she is now. She tried to runaway from home 6 times from1/3/2017 til last week each time being picked up by police and brought to local Behavior Science Unit. She has Toruettes syndrome and has been homeschooled all along as well and done very well. Some of our adult children do not agree with the fact we are Trads and homeschool.
Axes needed to be ground as to how we hurt her and traumatized her...one such exampled was our son who married a divorced protestant woman. He is leading the charge on this. He asked us if she could be a member of the wedding party as a flower girl in the Methodist church we told him no...he has never forgiven us for this...the woman working with our family from the BSU a lapsed Catholic..telling me I was wrong that I traumatized her by doing that. My pastor told me she couln not participate. We are open to suggestions as we are told even telling her no to anything is traumatizing her. We are ready to just say you know what...you raise her. SHe is our youngest ..of 11 chlidren. We are in our 60's. Any suggestions.

LaramieHirsch · « **Reply #1 on:** February 03, 2017, 01:51:38 AM »

Quote from: LaramieHirsch

Continue to say "no" when you have to, even if it pisses them off. Fight them as much as possible to prevent them from taking away your kid. Should they succeed, do what you can to get her back. If she grows up one day resenting you, you tried. It's more than what most parents and single moms do.

poche · « **Reply #2 on:** February 03, 2017, 02:29:46 AM »

I will pray for you.

Stubborn · « **Reply #3 on:** February 03, 2017, 05:10:06 AM »

Certainly you know that you did not traumatize her by doing that, we Catholics are raised to know better, and presumably, your son was likely raised to know better than to even ask such a thing - and he knows this regardless that he lost the faith. Traumatize her indeed - baloney!

It's a tragic situation, one that all of us trads, or at least every trad I know has dealt with in some way, and it's only worse because she is 18 years old so the world expects you to simply accept which ever way your "adult" daughter chooses to go. The devil wants that soul so bad and he doesn't care whether he uses smiles or gnashing teeth against you to get it.

Quote from: Robin

We are ready to just say you know what...you raise her. SHe is our youngest ..of 11 chlidren. We are in our 60's. Any suggestions.

That sure seems like the best way out, but is it? Maybe for you, but only you can guess if it will even matter at all to your daughter. Will letting her go help her come back to the faith, or can it only help her in her quest to completely lose it?

I can only suggest that you keep trying to do what is right as you have been - certainly God knows you've held up your end of the bargain to raise her in the faith and all the tribulations involved in doing that, but if it comes to a point where you can no longer control your child, then at 18 years old, you can no longer control your child. Sometimes holding out hope that she will come back to her senses does more harm than good - other times, when they regain their senses, it ends up being worth the battle.

If I could suggest anything, I suggest that you remain steadfast and remain uncompromising and do what you need to do to save your own souls, this is what God expects of you. There actually are times when you need to simply let go for the good of your own soul and that of your other children. I don't say that this is that time, that's your call and as tragic a thing as it is, sometimes that's the best thing that you can do - and you do it for the good of your own soul and the souls under your care.

It's a terrible situation, I will pray to Our Lady of the Smile for your family. Get a statue of this Lady and put it in your house, the sooner the better. I cannot say enough good about her, I will only say she has done wonders for us and other trads that I know, all *were* in similar situations as yours. The key word there is "were".

Student of Qi · « **Reply #4 on:** February 03, 2017, 07:25:22 AM »

You have my prayers, Robin.

I am convinced, due to other circuмstances of others I know, that if one is going to stay Catholic the World and those that love it will persecute you.

Stay strong! Fr. Gruner used to say "God will ask us not if we were successfull, but rather, did we try our best?" Don't give up now. I don't think you have come this far just to come this far!