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I don't know anything about Hospice but my mother-in-law died in a nursing home and I became convinced in hindsight that they had hastened her death.  It is a horrible feeling.  

I think that most people are pro-euthanasia now and we must be vigilant, no matter who is giving care to our loved ones or where.  This is not paranoia.

God bless you, Myrna.  

I was going to say this.

I have had experience both working in these facilities and having my loved ones in hospice and/or nursing homes.  It is terrible.

My father-in-law was in hospice during the end of 2003.  He was battling brain cancer.  We talked to him a month before his death and although he was dying, he was coherent and knew who we were.  A month later he was dead.  My mother-in-law admitted she was giving him large doses of morphine with the encouragement of the hospice staff.  My husband believes she overdosed him.  This was in Florida, so I believe it to be so.

My mother has been in various nursing homes over the years for recovery from stroke and hip surgery.  She is now in one for recovery from a serious fall.  If you are responsible for the care of an elderly or disabled person, you have to be diligent!  The first time I had no control and didn't know what was going on.  It was horrible.  My mother was drugged all the time and didn't know what was even going on.

But this time, I have been an advocate for her and this experience has been much better.  Good home with a caring staff and a physician who doesn't believe all these pills are necessary or even good.  There is even a live-in dog!

I will add this, though.  The problem is largely related to insurance companies.  Insurance companies tell the hospitals and doctors what they are going to pay them and for what "conditions" they will approve.  I just found out the magnitude of this, so I did some research.  

In September, my mother had a fall.  She had been experiencing a general decline for about a year and was taking a lot of medications that I didn't really think were good for her.  In any case, she had a fall and couldn't get up on her own.  She didn't break anything but was having a really hard time.  Anyone could see that she just really needed some physical or occupational therapy for a little while.  Simple.

Well, she had to go the hospital for evaluation.  The Dr could also see that a short stay in the nursing home would be beneficial to get her up moving.  But Medicare wouldn't allow it as a matter of choice or the Dr. just saying that he thought it was necessary.  This Dr. was very frank with me.  He admitted to me that there were only certain conditions that would be allowed and first he had to have her admitted to the hospital as an actual inpatient and to do that she had to have a medical condition on the list that the "admission board" could approve.

Guess what?  My mother strangely developed an infection of some unknown origin.  She was admitted to the hospital and given antibiotics.  Then this condition was presented as the "cause" of her inability to walk and then medicare would pay for her to receive physical therapy.

Crazy.  But this is the system.  Dr's are limited by the insurance companies.  They are also limited by the hospital.  It's all about MONEY instead of real patient care.

Everyone must be aware of this.  Hospice is just another of these programs.  They receive funding from Medicare, Medicaid, and insurance companies.  Yes, there are also considered charitable organizations, but they are ultimately about making money.  And in order for them to get money from the insurance companies they will jump through the same hoops as everyone else.

I don't have a choice right now but to have my mother in the nursing home.  She is completely disabled and with children at home, managing her under these circuмstances is just too difficult.

I am certain that people who have dying family members feel the same.  It is hard watching your loved ones suffer.  So hospice provides an option and in many cases many people are pleased.  However, we must be aware of what the bottom line is.  In most cases it is not about the care of your loved one.  It is about money.

We live in very difficult times.  Society is perfectly happy with killing unborn babies.  Why would we not believe how happy they are to kill elderly people and the disabled?  

Yesterday, I took my husband to his doctor, and talked to him about Morphine, he assured me my husband is on a low dose and doing well, with his pain management.  He did admit that many patients are on a much, much higher dose and it can and probably will interfere with their breathing.

Thank you all for bringing this to the attention of those who are not aware.  

Unfortunately we are at the mercy of the Medical field, or we can choose to just stay home and die without any advice or help from anyone.  

I will do my best to keep my husband and mother home and watch their medicine intake, pray I make the correct decision according to God's Will.  

I hope all this discussion was not distressing for you.  You are clearly a good wife and daughter and committed to being a good Catholic.  Thank you for being a good example to me of trusting in God under difficult circuмstances.