Stubborn I'm sure if you gave her $5,000 to move and a house in the suburbs and paid the property tax each year, the NJ mother would have moved.
From this statement, I can tell you know very little about these women.
After my parents divorced, my mother became involved with a much undesirable man. He was an alcoholic, scuм bag. They lived in a shack with no indoor bathroom. My mother was a nurse with a perfectly decent income. As part of the divorce, my mother received from my father a portion of the sale of some lumber on their property. I still have the returned check that my father kept for all those years. Over $75,000. Yes, that's correct. In 1980, that would have bought a very comfortable home in a decent neighborhood. What did my mother do? Bought the scuмbag a a huge truck and went on vacation after vacation. They didn't even put a bathroom in their shack.
My mother's husband proceeded to wrap his truck around a tree a few months later. The rest of the money that was left went to pay his rehab and physical therapy. He had a huge metal rod put into his right leg because every single bone was crushed.
These people live in a vicious cycle of self-imposed poverty and disease.
They would rather have 5 brief minutes of pleasure than leave behind their life. Money makes zero difference.
I have literally hundreds of stories from my own family to tell you about their self-imposed poverty. It makes them feel important to be victims. It really does.