I haven't said anything about this because my mom was embarrassed and didn't want her personal information splashed all over the Internet, but I can no longer keep it secret. Not only do I need to keep myself sane by getting some good advice, but my mom needs all the prayers she can get.
My mom has been on antidepressants since a ѕυιcιdє attempt when she was around 40, when my dad divorced her. After that she threw herself into her work with renewed energy, juiced up on these pills. But two years ago -- she is 64 now -- as I was in the process of conversion, the whole house of sand inevitably collapsed. The pills weren't working, the work environment had become toxic, and I was telling her she had to quit, because part of her job was incompatible with Catholicism. She had a major breakdown and became almost like a zombie.
Recently my mom tried to hang herself and today I had to check her into the psych ward of a hospital yet again, despite that they continue to ply her with drugs, constantly changing her prescription. That was outweighed by the necessity that she be closely monitored for the next few days. The next thing to try is Neurotransmitter Restoration Therapy, but my mom is in a deep black hole. She will say things like "You were right about everything, but it's too late for me" and "The devil has got me." No matter what you suggest, the answer comes back as negative and despairing.
On top of this, I have her psychiatrist pushing shock therapy on me. My atheist uncle also sees that as an option while I do not. They find my Catholicism a nuisance, I think. I won't even drive her to the pharmacy to get the drugs because they are what got her here in the first place and I have taken a slightly more "tough love" approach, while everyone else is using her as a guinea pig, in my opinion. If they don't have God, they don't have the answers. Simple as that. My mom needs to completely detox to see clearly, because I believe these drugs are blocking the action of the Holy Ghost, but as soon as she starts to go through the inevitable withdrawal she has another breakdown and then they lock her up and give her more drugs... It's an endless, exhausting cycle.
My mom is nominally Catholic. She was a catechumen with me and was baptized with me last year, but she seems to intellectually understand the faith more than she has internalized it. And she still resists certain teachings. It can be incredibly worrisome to think your mom is a Catholic only to hear one day "I don't believe in heaven or hell like you do." Yeah, she knows that is what the Church teaches, but part of her resists all of this and finds it too harsh, I think. The problem is that God cannot help her to the fullest extent until she starts to believe everything He says. I constantly have to admonish her not to kill herself, because part of her obviously still believes if she does, she will have blackness and peace. The thought of hell nearly drove me insane when I was converting, so I understand why she has gone into denial about it. But she is also one of those who the fear of hell should help, to stop them from doing something stupid -- if only they'd believe in it.
Bottom line, I will need the most fervent prayers to the Virgin and to your saints of choice. I am asking everyone here to help me. Alexandria, you had good success with your prayers for me, when I was a home-aloner -- now you really have your work cut out for you! Please pray especially for enlightenment, that she will stop making up her own kinder, gentler religion in her head and accept revealed truths -- and also pray that God has mercy on her. She was truly duped by the liberal time in which she was raised; a true believer in all the lies, despite having many good qualities ( she was a virgin until marriage and put a high premium on monogamy, just without being in the Church ).
I may say more about this tomorrow, more about what led her to this pass, so that people can understand in more detail how she has been driven to this. But I still feel some of this information is too personal for the Internet, despite the emergency situation. I'll beg her tomorrow to give me permission, though, because I think it has the seeds of a potential great conversion story. But she is not there yet, and is in great danger of losing her soul. Satan is working on her overtime, and it is not pretty.