My suggestion is for everyone to study formal logic before they begin to espouse ideas that are combative on the board. Everything else is good and useful, but there is so much debate on the board I recommend everyone studies formal logic. There are some great books on Dialectical Logic (minor logic) and Epistemology/Criteriology (major logic) out there.
I don't agree it's a requirement to argue, but, it's a valuable investment in time.
Whether it's here, or on other boards, confrontations are inevitable. I've been studying it formally for the past few months and enjoy it.
There are practical skills, like learning to spot fallacies, argument mapping, and the basics of deductive and inductive logic are fun, game like skills that not only help build your own responses more effectively, but often, understand better then your
opponent his ideas. This approach also helps (yes, only helps) in removing the emotional factor.
It's an art with great depth, and the better you understand it, the more interesting it gets. I've only begun scratching the surface.
Added: The harder skill is then to integrate this knowledge into your text, without sounding pompous, robot like, or insensitive. I have not tackled that part yet.