1)Don't even ask what Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar...
2)Jack Bauer once got a taped confession from a mute.
3)Jack Bauer Knows Exactly how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
4)People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
5)Jack Bauer's resume simply reads, "Jack Bauer".
6)If everyone at CTU listened to Jack Bauer, it wouldn't be 24...it would be 12.
7)Jack Bauer gets McDonalds breakfast at 10:30am.
8)Jack Bauer found Waldo and killed him.
9)The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
10)Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.
11)Jack Bauer doesn't breathe. The air hides in his lungs for protection.
12)Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the bomb was.
13)Jack Bauers calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
14)Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.
15)When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer really hates lemonade.
16)Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
17)It's no use crying over spilt milk... Unless that was Jack Bauer's milk. Oh you are so screwed.
18)Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
19)If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice
20)If Jack Bauer's gun jams, it's because he wanted to beat you with it.
21)Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
22)Jack Bauer doesn't eat, sleep, or use the bathroom because his organs are afraid of making him angry.
23)Jack Bauer sleeps with a gun under the pillow. But he could kill you with the pillow.
24)Jack Bauer is the 'I' in team.
25)Beaten to a pulp, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."
26)There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television.
27)Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
28)The state of California plans to reduce violent crime by changing the method of capital punishment from lethal injection to Jack Bauer.
Topic: Jack Bauer (Read 759 times)