i have been clean for almost 4 months. however i still have a very lustful mindset.

God be praised, young lady.  As they say: Ten miles into the forest, ten miles out.  This particular battle will continue for a while, so just keep fighting.

things on tv, music, or random thoughts cause me find myself in a lustful state.

TV is full of visual triggers, and music immediately influences the emotions.  Be careful and sparing in your use of both.

it even causes me to aroused. i have cleaned up my life in many ways but this is one of my most difficult battles.

Even those who have never fallen are easily aroused.  It is the way we are as a consequence of the fall of Adam and Eve.

Hold on, girl.

i feel as if i'm missing out by not partying thru my college years. because i do want to have those experiences, but i know it is very wrong.

Missing what?  Making an idiot out of yourself, risking your health and life, and adding to your debt before God and the list of things you will wish you had never done when you finally meet your husband?

Dear, I have been down this road.  I sure as hell didn't start making better decisions at 19.  PRAISE GOD that you are doing so.  TRUST Him.  Pray the Holy Rosary as often as you are able.  Start small, but solid - build up from there.

You will be okay, dear.  Please believe me when I say I know whereof you speak.  God desires your salvation and He CAN and WILL help in every way you need, so long as you ask (and many times when you do not).

thank you so much for the guidance. i started to see signs that the things i was doing was leaving me essentially unhappy. i was raised catholic and still had my faith, yet i put my selfish ways before my faith. i am now deciding to accept jesus and allow him to guide my life. i want to make myself better. your words are inspirational and i thank you.

Lust will always leave you unhappy because it is a thirst that can never be quenched.  

You can never get enough.  The more you act on your desires, the more they will become inflamed.  

The only solution is to fight with all your might, using the help of the Virgin Mary.  Imagine her blue robes and peaceful, meek aura.  Imagine the shame you would feel at doing anything impure in her sight.  

Not only should you stop watching TV, you should stop looking around you as you walk back and forth to and from class.  Colleges are a hotbed of hormones.  

One method I can recommend is to style your hair or your clothes in a way that makes you feel ugly.  I find that when I feel unattractive, that I'm less apt to be attracted to others.  I don't know about you, but I used to be very vain and what really attracted me were women who would play into my vanity.  So many modern relationships are based on mutual ego satisfaction.

So now when I do my hair I arrange it in an unflattering way and dress like a slob in clothes that I've worn for a week or more.  Try it, it works.  Overcoming your vanity is surprisingly effective at also overcoming lust.

If you go outside and feel gross and unkempt, and think everyone is staring at you because you are so ugly, the last thing on your mind will be romance.  But if you are strutting about campus in provocative outfits, you will not only inflame others but yourself in the bargain.  You will excite yourself about yourself and you will need a man, or boy, to be your mirror and admire you.

I hope that makes sense.  I think you might have that kind of mindset since you seem to be afraid of "wasting your youth."  That must really be a temptation for women who want to be worshipped while they still have their looks and figure.  But those are going to fade.  Today is always a good day to become Mary Magdalene and repent for the rest of your life.

Raoul76, thank you for the very good advice!

God has blessed us by giving us so many great reasons and causes to live for... the flesh isnt one of them because it just rots. Something I always think when I see pretty girls... they wither and wrinkle quickly, and before you know it they are but food for the worms (if their soul isnt already). Keep that in mind whenever you see handsome men.

I'll keep you in my prayers and pray for your perseverance.

Vladimir! I need your signature to back me up please!

Stop watch television, anyone watching immodest immoral films, series & shows, will indeed be tempted by the sensual characters and scenes of impurity composed by the devil to make the world lovers of pleasure and lust. Sadly though, even in so called "Christian" films have the devil mixed in sinful scenes, immodest dress, etc...

Most on the television (except maybe Christian films, which is watched for the glory of God), is sinful anyway, whether or not you want to admit it or believe it. Few people there are that will be honest in this question. Fasting with the eyes is needful for staying pure.

The next thing you need to do is to stop eating more then you need, avoid all superfluity in food and drink, such as candy, snacks, crisps, etc. Eat two meals a day, fast on other days. Nothing so easily subjects the flesh as fasting.

Even if you do these things and more, you will still be tempted and fall, for satan never sleeps. You must have patience and trust in God praying for help. You must not touch yourself, and you must not find enjoyment in your sinful thoughts. You must renounce them and reject them, if you do think about them enjoying them, satan gains power, and the good spirit leaves.

The road is narrow, which is why few find it.


Want more help? Start to read the Revelations of Saint Bridget; they will give you powerful tools against the devil.

Moderated: It's hard for someone to need a link WHEN YOUR NAME IS A URL, for crying out loud! Hmm, do you suppose those Revelations of St. Bridget are at the domain specified by your name? And you have quite the "signature" text as well.

Thank you for trying to help her, but it really makes it look like you're just seeking another "hit" for your website, and don't really care about her, when you work "Revelations of St. Bridget" into every thread on the forum.

God has blessed us by giving us so many great reasons and causes to live for... the flesh isnt one of them because it just rots. Something I always think when I see pretty girls... they wither and wrinkle quickly, and before you know it they are but food for the worms (if their soul isnt already). Keep that in mind whenever you see handsome men.

I'll keep you in my prayers and pray for your perseverance.

Vladimir! I need your signature to back me up please!

I can't really say anything but second what has been said here. Pride is the cause of many sins, so if you humble yourself then you will be less likely to sin.

You must frequent the Holy Mass and the Sacraments, especially Confession, and receive Holy Communion devoutly and often though -- daily if you can. Go to  Confession as often as you can as well.

Read "Preparation for Death" by St. Alphonsus Maria de Liguori if you have not already, I have a link to a pdf file of it on my website (which you can find in my signature), or you can purchase a physical copy of it from www.chantcd.com for only thirteen dollars.