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St. Valentine was a holy Catholic priest in Rome, who suffered the ultimate sacrifice for his faith in the year A.D. 270 under the Emperor Aurelian. Even See's Candies commemorates his martyrdom with RED HEART-SHAPED BOXES, for only $5.00 more in the one-pound size.
This is in contrast to the only other SAINT-name still found on calendars used by people with no faith whatsoever: St. Patrick; because on St. Patrick's Day you can still find (green) cabbage for less than half price. But I digress.
Here's a nice homeschool problem. See's Candies generally doesn't give you more for your money with larger sizes of their boxes less than 3 pounds. If a 6-candy "mini assortment" costs $6.00, how many candies can you expect will be in a $23.00 one-pound heart-shaped box? (Answer 1 below.)
If St. Valentine's Day vestments are red because he was a martyr, what color would be expected for St. Patrick's Day vestments, when he was NOT a martyr? (Answer 2 below.)
There is a story that when he was in prison awaiting his execution, St. Valentine passed around little notes to the other prisoners to tell them of God's love for them. This is where we get the practice of sending Valentines to those we love.
Speaking of love, there is a kind of chemistry going on. While I don't know if St. Valentine or St. Patrick were chemists, they did die, you know. And chemists are people too. So, what do you do with a chemist when he dies? (Answer 3 below.)
Why do you suppose that good chemistry jokes are so hard to find? (Answer 4 below.)
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1 - There are 2 answers. The simple one is 23 pieces. But if you figure in that $5 charge for the heart box, it would be only 18 pieces!
2 - You might expect green vestments, but if you check your calendar or missal before going to Mass, you would expect white.
3 - When a chemist dies, you Barium.
4 - It's because all the good ones Argon.