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I also think the style of your posts has changed dramatically of late. Maybe you're just thinking more deeply and waxing poetic. I've enjoyed some of them.

I know my posts have changed drastically. I can explain why. I believe I was spiritually ill for a while and fell into mortal sin and because of this I became very sick and I went to the hospital and I felt like I almost died and I was there three weeks and I felt like I was in hell which I believe was my penance. And then after three weeks I got well and made a good confession. And now I feel like I am a new person, like I was born again, not in the fake protestant way which is merely wishful thinking, but in the true way by the grace of the sacraments and the Blood of Christ. After I was able to go to Church again I received Our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament and it was a very happy experience. I have received Communion three times since and I think I feel the grace of the good God. I may have gone to confession and Communion in the hospital but I do not remember. My father told me the chaplain who visited me gave me an exorcism (probably minor, as major exorcisms require a lot of red tape, but my father did not say). He gave me a Bible in Spanish and told me to pray two Psalms. But during my stay someone stole my Bible. In the hospital people were always coming into my room and stealing things, especially holy things, as there are devils there who want to take away all your sacramentals so that you go to hell. Like wicked nurses who take brown scapulars off the bodies of the dying in the hopes that they will go to hell.

I am trying to live in faerie land, like Tolkien, or be like a child like Mozart in Amadeus. And I am trying to learn how to write poetry and sing songs and play the guitar and whistle like the birds whistle. And I want to learn Latin and French and Spanish and other languages. Whistling is one of my talents. And I try to keep watch over the neighborhood for an hour in the evenings. I light a candle and sit on my porch and I watch the people walk by, often with their dogs. And when a good person walks by I let them pass and when a bad person walks by I send them away. I do not know how to explain it except to say that one ought to read Le Petit Prince.

I go on walks and look at babies. I try to help out anyway I can. I pray and I work for my family. I try to do what my parents tell me to do. Obedience is an important virtue. I am working on it. And silence. It is important to never talk unless you are spoken to first, unless you are in a position of authority. Keep silent. Speak with your heart and with your body, not with your lips. I pray to Gemma to teach me how to shut up and when I speak I get angry at her and show her signs of my displeasure. It is hard for me to keep quiet because I always want to speak to myself out loud, in distress or in joy.

So I am very happy. I love nature and I am trying to have joy. The real Joy of the God who brings joy to our youth. I may seem giddy, but I am doing very well and am happy.

But I feel like the devil is everywhere but the good God is always a step ahead of him. I think that if we are good Christians the Holy Ghost should dwell inside of our souls. So we should be immaculate. But the seed of the devil is also inside of us and the devil fights with the Holy Ghost so we make mistakes. Sometimes I think that all imperfections are because of the devil, and I think if we say the wrong word or make a spelling error, or forget the lyrics of a song, it is because the devil is tempting us or playing tricks on us. But this must be false because we are not afflicted by the devil alone, but also the world and the flesh. I don't know. But I am well, I have been asked a number of times if I am on drugs or if I am ill, but I feel better than I have as long as I can remember so do not worry. But like I said I am trying to help turn our lives and the world into a faerie tale with a happy ending in heaven.

I have always thought you were a good poster, Matto, but of late
I have enjoyed reading your posts because, although seeming a bit strange, they are full of wisdom.

God bless you, and I will pray you remain feeling well.

By the way, that is a great device and a great way to cook eggs. I love the idea of two lashings of butter. Yum!