Author Topic: Dumb notes from parents (Read 1939 times)

Matthew · « **on:** April 19, 2007, 10:53:08 AM »

You'll have to excuse the fact that this e-mail was written in ALL CAPS -- some people do that.

NO PARENT LEFT BEHIND

These are REAL notes written by PARENTS in a Tennessee school district. (Spellings have been left intact.)

1-- MY SON IS UNDER A DOCTOR'S CARE AND SHOULD NOT TAKE PE TODAY. PLEASE EXECUTE HIM

2-- PLEASE EXKUCE LISA FOR BEING ABSENT SHE WAS SICK AND I HAD HER SHOT

3-- DEAR SCHOOL : PLEASE ECSC's JOHN BEING ABSENT ON JAN 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 AND ALSO 33.

4-- PLEASE EXCUSE GLORIA FROM JIM TODAY. SHE IS ADMINISTRATING.

5-- PLEASE EXCUSE ROLAND FROM P.E. FOR A FEW DAYS. YESTERDAY HE FELL OUT OF A TREE AND MISPLACED HIS HIP.

6-- JOHN HAS BEEN ABSENT BECAUSE HE HAD TWO TEETH TAKEN OUT OF HIS FACE.

7-- CARLOS WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE WAS PLAYING FOOTBALL. HE WAS HURT IN THE GROWING PART.

8-- MEGAN COULD NOT COME TO SCHOOL TODAY BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN BOTHERED BY VERY CLOSE VEINS.

9-- CHRIS WILL NOT BE IN SCHOOL CUS HE HAS AN ACRE IN HIS SIDE.

10-- PLEASE EXCUSE RAY FRIDAY FROM SCHOOL HE HAS VERY LOOSE VOWELS.

11-- PLEASE EXCUSE PEDRO FROM BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD (DIAHRE, DYREA, DIREATHE), THE SH**S. [NOTE: WORDS IN ( )'s WERE CROSSED OUT.]

12-- PLEASE EXCUSE TOMMY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD DIARRHEA, AND HIS BOOTS LEAK.
13-- IRVING WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE MISSED HIS BUST.

14-- PLEASE EXCUSE JIMMY FOR BEING. IT WAS HIS FATHER'S FAULT.

15-- I KEPT BILLIE HOME BECAUSE SHE HAD TO GO CHRISTMAS SHOPPING BECAUSE DON'T KNOW WHAT SIZE SHE WEAR.

16-- PLEASE EXCUSE JENNIFER FOR MISSING SCHOOL YESTERDAY WE FORGOT TO GET THE SUNDAY PAPER OFF THE PORCH, AND WHEN WE FOUND IT MONDAY. WE THOUGHT IT WAS SUNDAY.

17-- MY DAUGHTER WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE SHE WAS TIRED. SHE SPENT A WEEKEND WITH THE MARINES.

18-- PLEASE EXCUSE JASON FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD A COLD AND COULD NOT BREED WELL.

19-- PLEASE EXCUSE MARY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY SHE WAS IN BED WITH GRAMPS.

20-- GLORIA WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY AS SHE WAS HAVING A GANGOVER.

21-- PLEASE EXCUSE BRENDA. SHE HAS BEEN SICK AND UNDER THE DOCTOR.

22-- MARYANN WAS ABSENT DECEMBER 11-16, BECAUSE SHE HAD A FEVER, SORETHROAT, HEADACHE AND UPSET STOMACH. HER SISTER WAS ALSO SICK, FEVER AND SORE THROAT, HER BROTHER HAD A LOW GRADE FEVER AND ACHED ALL OVER. I WASN'T THE BEST EITHER SORE THROAT AND FEVER. THERE MUST BE SOMETHING GOING AROUND, HER FATHER EVEN GOT HOT LAST NIGHT.

NOW WE KNOW WHY PARENTS ARE SCREAMING FOR BETTER EDUCATION FOR OUR KIDS.

Carolus Magnus · « **Reply #1 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:12:01 AM »

Did it cross your mind that these notes good be by new arrivals to America to whom English is a second language, I for one would probably make similiar mistakes if I attempted to write in Spanish, it does not necessarily mean that these people are stupid nor that the American education system is to blame as they may never have even been through it.

Trinity · « **Reply #2 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:12:18 AM »

:roll-laugh2: :roll-laugh2: :roll-laugh2:

Matthew · « **Reply #3 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:14:29 AM »

Point well-taken, but Tennessee is not famous for its (Hispanic, Eastern European, Greek, etc.) population...

With a few possible exceptions, I think most of these people speak English (or Ebonics) as their primary language.

I've been alive long enough to be very familiar with the grammatical and spelling mistakes of English/Ebonics native speakers.

I have also been around plenty of those for whom English is a 2nd (or 3rd) language. Would you believe that these people are actually very good at written English? Besides, some of them speak better English than the natives.

Even those who make mistakes in their speech make FAR FEWER mistakes in their writing -- especially spelling. I've never seen an intelligent person spell because "cus".

Matthew

Carolus Magnus · « **Reply #4 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:18:36 AM »

Quote from: ChantCd

Point well-taken, but Tennessee is not famous for its (Hispanic, Eastern European, Greek, etc.) population...

With a few possible exceptions, I think most of these people speak English (or Ebonics) as their primary language.

I've been alive long enough to be very familiar with the grammatical and spelling mistakes of English/Ebonics native speakers.

Matthew

If that is true then why are all the names either hispanic or white names? I don't see anyone named Jemal but I see Carlos, Mary, Gloria etc.

Vandaler · « **Reply #5 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:27:45 AM »

Quote from: Carolus Magnus

Did it cross your mind that these notes good be by new arrivals to America to whom English is a second language, I for one would probably make similiar mistakes if I attempted to write in Spanish, it does not necessarily mean that these people are stupid nor that the American education system is to blame as they may never have even been through it.

It's still funny, and if it was my note in this compilation, I would still find it funny after I would have gained proper command of the language to recognize my mistakes.

Then again, it's not obvious that under my cut-throath arrogance I have a good sense of humour.

antyshemanic · « **Reply #6 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:43:18 AM »

I will vouch for Vandaler,he does have a great sense for humor like the one liner below.

My reasoning will not be outlined, and relies largely analysts who'm I lay my thrust on. :roll-laugh1:

:roll-laugh2:

http://clearblogs.com/magicgoofball/

Vandaler · « **Reply #7 on:** April 19, 2007, 11:44:47 AM »

Quote from: antyshemanic

I will vouch for Vandaler,he does have a great sense for humor like the one liner below.

My reasoning will not be outlined, and relies largely analysts who'm I lay my thrust on. :roll-laugh1: :roll-laugh2:

http://clearblogs.com/magicgoofball/

I'll correct that !

CampeadorShin · « **Reply #8 on:** April 19, 2007, 01:56:47 PM »

Carolus Magnus said:

Quote

Did it cross your mind that these notes good be by new arrivals to America to whom English is a second language, I for one would probably make similiar mistakes if I attempted to write in Spanish, it does not necessarily mean that these people are stupid nor that the American education system is to blame as they may never have even been through it.

I'm a jerk, sue me.

The school system has become a propaganda factory.

Carolus Magnus · « **Reply #9 on:** April 19, 2007, 02:39:56 PM »

Shows how easy such a thing is done when we are not paying full attention to what we are doing and are in hurry though does it not.

My brain works faster than I can type, thats my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

By the way going back to the thread about the word crap do you any idea how disgustingly vulgar the word jerk is?

CampeadorShin · « **Reply #10 on:** April 19, 2007, 02:51:20 PM »

Your first sentence needs a question mark.

Sorry, I didn't realize people saw "jerk" as vulgar.

Vandaler · « **Reply #11 on:** April 19, 2007, 02:51:31 PM »

Quote from: Carolus Magnus

Shows how easy such a thing is done when we are not paying full attention to what we are doing and are in hurry though does it not.

My brain works faster than I can type, thats my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

Yep... English is my second language and one of my afflictions is the letter "h" that seem to pop everywhere in my text, or go missing where it's needed.

Anty's catch was very good and timely and I welcome in good spirit anytime I get caught with my pants down.

Trinity · « **Reply #12 on:** April 19, 2007, 02:55:43 PM »

"People" don't think "jerk" is vulgar. Carolus does.

Carolus Magnus · « **Reply #13 on:** April 19, 2007, 03:01:53 PM »

Quote from: Trinity

"People" don't think "jerk" is vulgar. Carolus does.

Do I sense a vendatta? Holding a grudge is beneath you Trinity.

Someone told me Jerk refers to something rather disgusting, maybe they where wrong I don't know, but their explanation made sense.

antyshemanic · « **Reply #14 on:** April 19, 2007, 03:21:19 PM »

Quote from: Trinity

"People" don't think "jerk" is vulgar. Carolus does.

I think that would be in the context of how you use the word. I think in the context that Carolus is saying by using the words 'SOMETHING' & 'DISGUSTING' then its describing
an ACT . So in that context I agree.
Now if I use the word in this context ...We had to jerk the rope to tighten the knot.
It does'nt sound disgusting. :read-paper: