Author Topic: Classy insults  (Read 375 times)

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Offline Matthew

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Classy insults
« on: March 04, 2008, 02:40:45 PM »
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  •       When Insults Had Class (no 4-letter words !!)

          The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you  
    were my husband I'd give you poison," and he said, "If you were my
    wife, I'd drink it." A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you
    will either die on  the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
    "That depends, Sir,"  said Disraeli, "on whether I embrace your
    policies or your mistress."

          "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr

          "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -
     Winston Churchill

          "A modest little person, with much to be modest about." - Winston
    Churchill

          "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with
    great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow

          "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to
    the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

          "Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big
    words?"  - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)

          "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time
    reading it." - Moses Hadas

          "He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I
    know."  -  Abraham Lincoln

           "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I
    approved of it." - Mark Twain

          "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -  
    Oscar Wilde

          "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play;  
    bring a friend.... If you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to
    Winston Churchill.   Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend
    second... If  there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

          "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
    -  Stephen Bishop

          "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

          "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing
    trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

          "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in
    others." - Samuel Johnson "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine
    to run up." - Paul Keating

           "There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
    Jack E. Leonard

           "He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." - Robert Redford

          "They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of
    human knowledge." - Thomas Brackett Reed

          "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
    -  Charles, Count Talleyrand

          "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
    "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address
    on it?" - Mark Twain

          "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -   Mae
    West

          "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -
    Oscar Wilde

          "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For  support
    rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912) "He has Van
    Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

          "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening But this wasn't it." -
    Groucho Marx
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    Offline Cletus

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    Classy insults
    « Reply #1 on: March 04, 2008, 04:17:59 PM »
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  • Quite a mixed bag. Some of them are objectionable even beyond the general offense of lacking in Christian mildness and charity. (The Churchill zinger in particular: No one should ever admire vice or speak lightly of admiring it.)

    The Marx quip is unobjectionable and funny.


    Offline Matthew

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    Classy insults
    « Reply #2 on: March 05, 2008, 04:47:45 PM »
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  • Yes, some of them are wishing evil on others, and other blatant offenses against charity. Others are just stating facts, such as:

    "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

    And I think it would be very appropriate to say this about George Bush -- again, it's just a fact:

    "He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know." - Abraham Lincoln
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