Author Topic: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32? (Read 668 times)

forlorn · « **on:** February 17, 2019, 08:39:16 AM »

Quote

And it hath been said, whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a bill of divorce. [32] But I say to you, that whosoever shall put away his wife, excepting for the cause of fornication, maketh her to commit adultery: and he that shall marry her that is put away, committeth adultery.

Protestants argue that the bolded part means divorce is moral in cases of adultery, and I'm not really sure how to refute them. What exactly does this passage mean - what's the exception here actually about?

Matthew · « **Reply #1 on:** February 17, 2019, 08:44:41 AM »

Quote from: forlorn on February 17, 2019, 08:39:16 AM

Protestants argue that the bolded part means divorce is moral in cases of adultery, and I'm not really sure how to refute them. What exactly does this passage mean - what's the exception here actually about?

Close but no cigar.

It doesn't mean you can divorce and remarry. It does mean that if your spouse commits adultery, you can refuse your spouse the marital debt for the rest of your marriage (until the death of one of the spouses), and have a separation of bed and board ("live in separate houses") in the meantime. And yes, nowadays that would require filing for a civil divorce.

But be careful! Once you know your spouse carnally after the adultery was discovered, that's considered taking them back or forgiving them, and you can't change your mind later. Unless they commit another act of adultery -- then you get to decide again.

But for Catholics, there is never question of remarriage, or getting another chance at it. The intimacy of marriage was not meant to be shared with 2-3 (much less 50+) people over your lifetime. God designed marriage and the marital union, and He knows all of its effects on individuals as well as society as a whole. It is fitting that God made some rules to govern its use.

When a woman (or man) catches their spouse cheating, there is a choice: reconcile/forgive them, or not. One does not have to. God, being the Author of human nature, and the Church, being a good, understanding mother, knows how difficult/impossible it can be once trust has been broken in this way. So
God doesn't make it impossible for us.

On the other hand, you don't get to divorce, ever. So while you can separate from your spouse (even if you suspect they will leave the Church, get remarried, etc. -- that's on them) you have to plan to live out the remainder of your life celibate (single) afterwards, unless you luck out and your cheating spouse gets hit by a bus!

Be careful and don't rush into marriage. I know some have argued that technically there are no guarantees, and that is true. However, in MOST cases, those who married poorly can only blame themselves. They could have avoided their fate if they had been more objective, had their eyes open, listened to (had more respect for?) their parents, and so on. Do your best, do your due diligence, and leave the rest in God's hands.

forlorn · « **Reply #2 on:** February 17, 2019, 09:10:11 AM »

Quote from: Matthew on February 17, 2019, 08:44:41 AM

Close but no cigar.

It doesn't mean you can divorce and remarry. It does mean that if your spouse commits adultery, you can refuse your spouse the marital debt for the rest of your marriage (until the death of one of the spouses), and have a separation of bed and board ("live in separate houses") in the meantime. And yes, nowadays that would require filing for a civil divorce.

But be careful! Once you know your spouse carnally after the adultery was discovered, that's considered taking them back or forgiving them, and you can't change your mind later. Unless they commit another act of adultery -- then you get to decide again.

But for Catholics, there is never question of remarriage, or getting another chance at it. The intimacy of marriage was not meant to be shared with 2-3 (much less 50+) people over your lifetime. God designed marriage and the marital union, and He knows all of its effects on individuals as well as society as a whole. It is fitting that God made some rules to govern its use.

When a woman (or man) catches their spouse cheating, there is a choice: reconcile/forgive them, or not. One does not have to. God, being the Author of human nature, and the Church, being a good, understanding mother, knows how difficult/impossible it can be once trust has been broken in this way. So
God doesn't make it impossible for us.

On the other hand, you don't get to divorce, ever. So while you can separate from your spouse (even if you suspect they will leave the Church, get remarried, etc. -- that's on them) you have to plan to live out the remainder of your life celibate (single) afterwards, unless you luck out and your cheating spouse gets hit by a bus!

Be careful and don't rush into marriage. I know some have argued that technically there are no guarantees, and that is true. However, in MOST cases, those who married poorly can only blame themselves. They could have avoided their fate if they had been more objective, had their eyes open, listened to (had more respect for?) their parents, and so on. Do your best, do your due diligence, and leave the rest in God's hands.

Makes sense, thank you. Now that you mention it, that concept of bed and board separation used to be the only form of "divorce" over here in Ireland until the 90s. Crazy to think about how closely Irish law following Church Law in the past and yet now we're a completely modernist and atheistic country.

Matthew · « **Reply #3 on:** February 17, 2019, 09:17:27 AM »

Speaking of bed and board separation -- that also goes for cases of spousal abuse. But again, the couple normally would resort to this only if absolutely necessary, because they can't move on or "try again" with someone new and strange.

So by forbidding remarriage, the Church emphasizes the permanence and sanctity of marriage, and encourages couples to work through their problems. No one wants to be alone for the rest of their life.

It keeps the couple honest. It's the difference between, "Oh it's broken? I'll be happy to exchange it for another one." and a no-questions-asked money back policy. In the latter, you have people "renting tools for free" at Home Depot. They buy a power tool or specialty tool, use it for a project, then return it afterwards. Imagine if they only allowed *exchanges* for defective merchandise. That would solve this problem. It would remove the moral hazard. (Google "moral hazard" if you don't know what that is)

But once you allow remarriage, then human nature/moral hazard steps in. Humans are curious, enjoy novelty, prefer the easy way over the hard way involving effort, etc. No wonder modern divorce (which includes remarriage) is commonplace today.

poche · « **Reply #4 on:** February 20, 2019, 01:13:27 AM »

Quote from: forlorn on February 17, 2019, 08:39:16 AM

Protestants argue that the bolded part means divorce is moral in cases of adultery, and I'm not really sure how to refute them. What exactly does this passage mean - what's the exception here actually about?

This issue of 'fornication' has been in reference to cases where the couple live together without the intention of being married.

Judith 15 Ten · « **Reply #5 on:** February 20, 2019, 01:51:27 AM »

True divorce is only effected when at least one of the persons marries during the state of mortal sin, thus, invalidating the Sacrament, such as being intoxicated while getting married; or at least one of the persons was under duress to get married (marrying against their will); or when at least one of the persons, objectively, didn't have the cognitive faculty to get married. The latter is extremely rare like the first two examples, but today's Newchurch basically uses that latter scenario as an excuse for many "divorces" and, thus, hands out "divorces" like candy.

Also, if one of the persons premeditatively marries the other for the purpose of stealing that person's assets, wealth & equity in the wake of a (premeditated) civil divorce, there was no true intent be united with that other person, thus, the Sacrament was invalid.

Author Topic: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32? (Read 668 times)

forlorn

What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?

Matthew

Re: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?

forlorn

Re: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?

Matthew

Re: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?

poche

Re: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?

Judith 15 Ten

Re: What is the Church's View/Interpretation of Matthew 5:31-32?