Obviously, we're all aware of the scandal(s) at Fisheaters. In light of the scandal, I have considered a solution that I thought would remedy their problem long ago (even before the Laura era).

When I used to post on that site, I noticed that there were certain subjects I felt were not appropriate for public discussion and thought they should be referred to a priest or spiritual director.  I felt people asking sincerely wanted or needed guidance and the matters would potentially lead people to sin.  On one occasion, for instance, a poster strongly criticized devotion to the BVM.  I responded to the poster and suggested that that sort of sentiment would be akin to voicing doubt or hostility to the True Presence -- one would need to speak to a priest, behind closed doors, about that issue rather than encourage other Catholics to identify with that sort of doubt.

After that situation, and when that thread was not deleted, I considered whether it was even appropriate for a lay person to be controlling this sort of apostolate.  The owner and moderator, Vox, must have originally had good intentions in having a reference site for all things Catholic; however, now that we know what we know about 1)her public sins, and 2) her seriously flawed grasp in applying Catholic teaching to REAL interactions and life, wouldn't it be better if a priest or religious could take over the forum moderation and she could just deal with the resources she's provided?

I know this scenario would be virtually impossible because priests and seminarians are extremely overwhelmed, but maybe there is a possibility of a retired priest taking over? The mere presence of an actual priest or religious brother moderator would give many of us pause before posting whatever we liked.

I think Vox desperately needs help and doesn't not understand how she is contributing to her own sin and that of others. IMO, we need to offer ideas for a way out so that she can focus on her own continual conversion without having to much public sway.

If someone ever decided to run FE like a traditional Catholic site, 99% of the current posters would leave of their own accord or get banned - that would be the start of a solution - as it is, FE is a social gathering site like FB, with a banner claiming to be Traditional Catholic.

FE has no business being named Traditional Catholic. FE would be telling the truth if it claimed itself to be Conciliar Catholic. Conciliarists embrace divorce/remarriage/homos, Catholics condemn the same.

Only solution to the Fisheaters problem:

To the original poster.

There is no substitute for real friends in real life. And having said that it should be sufficiently obvious that no questions pertaining to personal struggles, or the seeking of spiritual direction should go on there. Those kind of posts should have been deleted from the very beginning.

What good is taking a poll of participants and finding the answer that suits you best? That kind of post, at best, is unwittingly seeking excuses for sins.

And based on how things have always been run over there, and these two unbelievable public blow ups, I don't think it is possible to assume anything about Vox's intentions. And while that may sound like a negative statement, it is completely neutral.

If that were my forum, I would close up shop based on embarrassment alone. But she seems pretty bold.

My advice is make real friends after Mass. Go to conferences and meet new people and develop friendships. Because the nature of these forums causes anger, and people going overboard. And you never really know just who it is you are talking to at any given moment, now do you?

Share a meal. Have a glass of wine or a few beers. Talk about other things and you will find that it is much easier to cope with the evil in this world. Rather than have it consume you in the drama that plays out, and gets magnified in living a virtual life with virtual friends.

If you don't have a real life, with real friends, you should avoid the virtual sphere as it will probably keep you from finding kindred spirits that have a body attached to them and real people that might actually help you pump the water out of your flooded basement.  

Priests are available in the Confessional and by appointment. If it is worthy of a post, it is certainly worthy of the effort to find some real guidance. And let's face it, all those kinds of posts are not exactly rocket science. Any Catholic with the minimum understanding of the Faith can easily discern the answers all by themselves. But that, my friend, will close the door to the possible compromise which the inquirer seeks.

The Devil is in the details. It can be a little overwhelming if you have 100 'devils' getting involved and offering their interpretation of those details.

I agree - stay away from that site.  I got banned about two years ago but occasionally "lurked" on Fisheaters from time to time.  This last scandal was the last straw.  After the "Coming Out" thread and the moderator's numerous posts accepting Impy's/Clare's/ "whoever"'s devastating choices, I no longer even "lurk"  anymore.  When you encounter this type of scandal,  you pray for those involved, AND then remove yourself entirely from the source of sin.  This is the only Christian thing to do.  Cath Info has been a wonderful alternative to Fisheaters.  Thank you Matthew!

Let me see if I have this straight...

Fisheaters is a Traditional Catholic forum. The site owners were married to other people before meeting online on the site. They then left their spouses to move in together and get civilly married and announced this on the forum. They claimed this was a legitimate thing to do as they were presumably living as brother and sister until the annulments came through.  

Then a poster called Laura shows up asking questions about the Faith. The male site owner begins talking to her and forming a relationship. Laura then finds out she has a terminal disease and the male site owner starts prayer crusades for her. Then Laura fakes her own death sending the male site owner into a tailspin. It turns out Laura was a fraud. However this whole episode wrecks the civil marriage between the two site-owners so they file for divorce, even though they are not truly married.

Then a long time poster on the site posts a picture of himself dressed as a woman and publicly declares that he is not only a ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ, but is henceforth assuming the gender identity of a woman in real life and on that site. The reaction of the site owner, and many others on that web forum is to defend this decision and to act as if this man truly is a woman. The man is then found out to have been posting pornographic ads on ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ websites the whole time he was also posting on the forum as a Traditional Catholic. The site owner and other posters on the site then still defend the man. The site owner then bans those who criticize the man or her. Then the site owner and many posters attack posters on this forum for condemning these things as mean spirited and judgmental.

Is this pretty much the story? Is it even possible that this is true? It sounds like the ongoing plot to a very bad soap opera, not a Catholic web forum. It is almost not believable. I actually could not keep a straight face if I tried to explain this saga to someone in person. They would not believe me and assume I'd lost my mind.

Yup, in a nutshell - you hit the nail on the head.  Pretty pitiful, isn't it?  Definitely time to move on.

Don't get me wrong, there were wonderful people on fish eaters before I was banned.  It's become a cesspool since and hopefully those good people have left FE for good.

Your ideas are all very interesting but the solution for us is to just stay away from Fisheaters.  Never log in there and post and, if you are not a member of Fisheaters, never sign up.

That would take care of the problem, I would say.   :smile:

Let me see if I have this straight...

Fisheaters is a Traditional Catholic forum. The site owners were married to other people before meeting online on the site. They then left their spouses to move in together and get civilly married and announced this on the forum. They claimed this was a legitimate thing to do as they were presumably living as brother and sister until the annulments came through.  

Then a poster called Laura shows up asking questions about the Faith. The male site owner begins talking to her and forming a relationship. Laura then finds out she has a terminal disease and the male site owner starts prayer crusades for her. Then Laura fakes her own death sending the male site owner into a tailspin. It turns out Laura was a fraud. However this whole episode wrecks the civil marriage between the two site-owners so they file for divorce, even though they are not truly married.

Then a long time poster on the site posts a picture of himself dressed as a woman and publicly declares that he is not only a ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ, but is henceforth assuming the gender identity of a woman in real life and on that site. The reaction of the site owner, and many others on that web forum is to defend this decision and to act as if this man truly is a woman. The man is then found out to have been posting pornographic ads on ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ websites the whole time he was also posting on the forum as a Traditional Catholic. The site owner and other posters on the site then still defend the man. The site owner then bans those who criticize the man or her. Then the site owner and many posters attack posters on this forum for condemning these things as mean spirited and judgmental.

Is this pretty much the story? Is it even possible that this is true? It sounds like the ongoing plot to a very bad soap opera, not a Catholic web forum. It is almost not believable. I actually could not keep a straight face if I tried to explain this saga to someone in person. They would not believe me and assume I'd lost my mind.

That is the major events, but the site owner, between the civil divorce and the most recent scandal, has made it a rather personal thing to defend ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖs enough to make certain people leave the forum, because avoiding hurting potential feelings of active ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖs seemed more important than moral integrity.