📜 A Hypothetical Medieval Inquisitorial Declaration (Allegorical & Fictional)
In the Year of Our Lord MCCCLXXXVII, under the dread seal of the Sacred Tribunal of the Faith, let this decree go forth to all Christendom.
Whereas the writings of Master Salvius and Brother Sicardus, men swollen with confidence yet barren in discernment, have been laid before this Holy Office; and whereas their tome, vast in bulk yet void in truth, has been found to twist the words of the Fathers, to confound the simple, and to cloak error beneath the garments of authority;
We, the appointed guardians of the Apostolic Faith, after long examination and solemn deliberation, declare the said writings to be:
pernicious in doctrine, reckless in method, and perilous to the souls of the unwary.
For these authors, presuming to instruct the faithful, have dared to set their own judgment above the testimony of the ancient Doctors, and have fashioned arguments that crumble beneath the weight of the very authorities they invoke.
They speak boldly where the Saints speak cautiously, they bind where the Church has not bound, and they loose where the Church has not loosed. Thus do they scatter the flock and darken the lamp of understanding.
Therefore, by the authority entrusted to this Tribunal, we pronounce their work gravely suspect, its reasoning corrupt, its conclusions unsound, and its influence dangerous to the peace of Holy Church.
Let no cleric or layman receive their assertions as though they bore the weight of doctrine. Let their book be approached as one approaches a serpent in the grass — with vigilance, with discernment, and with the shield of the Fathers held high.
Yet we pass no sentence upon their souls, for judgment belongs to God alone. We admonish them as erring brothers, and we warn the faithful that their writings are not a beacon of truth but a snare woven of zeal without knowledge.
Thus is our decree set forth,
under our hand and seal,
in the cloister of Saint Veritas,
on the Feast of the Chair of Saint Peter.
So let it be written.
So let it stand.
🎻 The Ballad of Salvius and Sicardus
(A Medieval Tale of Scholarly Misadventure — Fictional & Allegorical)
I. O gather round, good Christians all, And hear a merry tune, Of Salvius bold and Sicardus wise, Who argued ‘neath the moon. With quills held high and parchments spread, They vowed to teach the schools— But every time they struck a pose, They made themselves the fools.
II. For Salvius cried, “I know the truth! The Doctors speak for me!” Yet when he cracked their ancient tomes, They sang a different key. He quoted Bellarminus loud, To prove his clever rules— But Bellarmine, in Latin clear, Made mockery of fools.
III. Then Sicardus rose with swelling pride, His inkpot full of might: “I’ll summon Suarez to my side, And win this learned fight!” But Suarez, saintly, shook his head From heaven’s shining stools— “Your gloss is thin, your logic bent; You twist the words of schools.”
IV. They thundered on through Wernz and Vid’, Through Coronata’s page, Yet every master they invoked Turned traitor on the stage. For each citation that they flung Like knights with sharpened tools, Came whirling back with comic speed To brand them as the fools.
V. The monks who watched their parchment war Could scarce contain their mirth: “To see two scholars trip themselves Is joy of rarest worth!” For never had the scriptorium Seen such befuddled duels— Where every stroke they meant as wise Proclaimed them merry fools.
VI. So let this ballad wander far, Through cloister, hearth, and hall: A warning to the zealous scribe Who thinks he knows it all. For pride may wield a mighty pen, And confidence its jewels— But truth alone crowns wisdom’s brow, And humbles would‑be fools.
Topic: Another A.I. Bug: Salza & Siscoe DESTORYED? (Read 522 times)