I haven't read the ENTIRE thread, but I just want to interject --
Women looking back on a consensual relationship (or even a one-night-stand) with often turn a consensual relationship into "rape" long after the fact. In particular, when she regrets it. She basically convinces herself that it WASN'T HER IDEA at all, because she couldn't be that stupid. Well, if it wasn't her idea, then I guess it was all HIS idea? But that would mean it wasn't consensual (agreed to by BOTH parties)? Waitaminnit... non-consensual sex means she was *gasp* RAPED! Oh no!
...that phenomenon IS a "thing" these days. It happens all the time now. Remember, this is the age of fourth-wave Feminism, female supremacy, and Me Too. Women can do no wrong.
Not saying that applies to anyone in particular -- just saying it IS a thing, just FYI.
And when you factor in the inherently flawed nature of HUMAN MEMORY male or female, it's easy to distort an event or situation, considering that each time you replay the situation, it changes a bit. Did you know that each and every time you "access" a memory it is somewhat modified in your brain? That's what biologists and psychologists say. Again, human memories are extremely flawed.
Your memory is not like a video recording stored on a hard drive. THAT is reliable, giving you the same thing every time you play it, and the same on Day 1 as on Day 10,000. But I've listened to songs after 30 years and was surprised how different they were from how I remembered them.