Steve's turmoil is caused by a continuation of what brought him here, an excessive guilt-driven need to worship priests.
Let it out, Steve, and just repeat this: "This priest sucks." and/or "This is a crappy priest."
Until you can embrace this as a legitimate judgment, you'll keep torturing yourself with guilt about feeling that way.
But truth is truth.
We've had crappy priests since time immemorial, with Judas himself at the Last Supper.
Once you can get past this passive-aggressive repression and part feeling sorry for yourself (acting victim), and just embrace the truth that "This priest sucks.", you're not going to get over it and have a chance to heal.
Newsflash. Many priests suck, and they sucked long before this Crisis.
Until you get past the feelings of guilt, then you can actually have pity for these crappy priests and pray for them.
Until then you're going to remain wound up like this
So the first step to healing is admit that you've been wronged and that his behavior was unacceptable. There's part of you trying to let this out, but part of you that's still repressing it, causing your turmoil. Let it out and just admit it.
I once witnessed a Trad priest turn down a lady who was desperately asking for him to hear her confession, and seemed in urgent need of it, because ... I kid you not ... he had to go to breakfast. I'm not going to sit here writhing with guilt for thinking that was an extremely crappy thing to do because "oh, he's a priest and we need to respect/worship our priest."
Priests. Newsflash. You were not chosen to be priests FOR YOUR GLORY but for the good of the faithful. No one deserves the priesthood and you have no right to glory in it. If you do, you will be damned. Yours is a life of servitude. Just as a parents has to stay up with a sick child, you are under obligation to serve the needs of the faithful without demanding constant obsequy and adulation.
Steve, you respect the Alter Christus who is in the priest, but you needn't worship and idolize that sinner in whom Our Lord has deigned to operate for some reason.