It is interesting to note that, at all the trad chapels I have been to, trad cath young men fall all over the liberally-dressed young ladies at church and then marry them, while the modest young ladies go unnoticed and unmarried.
Is it woman's fault men LOOK for loose women?  
Furthermore, men expect women to have loads of children, homeschool them, perform duties of a housewife, tend the finances, perhaps have a job outside the home, stay in shape and be attractive to her husband at all times.  While men have one job, do what they please around the house, get fat, and have their way with their wife as they please.  Are you kidding me?!

You sound very resentful in making these rash generalizations based upon personal experiences. This is the type of feminist rant I do not expect to see in CI. In a sane and organized society, both men and women have well established roles, duties, and responsibilities. Both are called to make sacrifices and life is not easy for anyone. Male nature is very different from female nature. Both need to be understood, instead of condemned. We all know that biologically, men's libido is not the same as women's libido. Intelligent wives need to keep this in mind regarding the marital debt. There are very few legitimate reasons for refusing (negligent failure to provide, adultery, abuse, intoxication, etc).

It is not easy for a man to be able to hold a job responsibly and provide financially for his family. You seem to underestimate this. After long hours at work, I do not see anything wrong with him coming home to a fresh and healthy meal, clean and organized home, well adjusted children, and a pretty wife who takes care of her appearance, and yes, that means staying in shape to please your husband. This is the man who is protecting you and providing for you after all, year after year, after year. He deserves it.

Wow.  I've never heard that.  Yes, Pius XII is off his rocker.  How does one justify that idea.  Totally wrong.  

Indeed.  Read "Natural Family Planning and the Christian Moral Code," available from fatherwathen.com or ebay.  Here's the blurb ----


Is Natural Family Planning actually “Catholic” – or is it sinful?
Natural Family Planning and the Christian Moral Code by Jeanne Dvorak, is now in its third printing.  It proves that NFP was a novel and sinful introduction into the modern Catholic world.   Written by a mother of sixteen, this booklet was said by Fr. James Wathen to be the best thing he knew on NFP/Rhythm.  It now includes a 1940 letter from the Archbishop of St Paul, MN, condemning NFP.  The author’s own mother was part of the early fight against this new “birth control,” and the Archbishop gave her a mandate to continue her opposition – even if it meant publicly reprimanding his own diocesan priests who were disobeying his prohibition against supporting NFP.  And yet the reader will find Natural Family Planning and the Christian Moral Code does more than just examine the negative.  It also offers to married couples having large family worries, both encouragement and “the big picture”: A fresh remembrance of God’s view, purpose and Providence – even with consideration of children as “supporting adults” in the parent’s future.   This booklet will allay fears and bolster confidence through its many stories and examples, and compellingly makes the case for leaving marriage open to all the children God would send, that they, too, have their chance at life, salvation and even sanctity.  Children are the first purpose of marriage.  Please read Natural Family Planning and the Christian Moral Code.    

It is interesting to note that, at all the trad chapels I have been to, trad cath young men fall all over the liberally-dressed young ladies at church and then marry them, while the modest young ladies go unnoticed and unmarried.
Is it woman's fault men LOOK for loose women?  

Do you have a father to advise you about life? The men you describe are useless idiots, good riddance that one of them didn't pursue your affections.

I never said anything about my personal experience, excluding what I see and hear from men and women at the various trad chapels I have attended for many decades.  For those of you who insinuated I am in such a situation and/or am a feminist and/or worse, for shame.

What I am saying is that it seems to me that here on CI and generally at the chapels I have attended, there is a predominance of men who become tyrants after marriage.

It seems to me that many of the men on CI seem to perpetrate this tyrannical idea of husbands.

As far as withholding sex, in my experience in talking with men and women at the various churches I have attended (why they confide so much in me, I don’t know), the justifiable reasons for saying “no” happen far more frequently than many people here want to admit. 

To these women I reference Matthew 18:21-35:

“Bless them that persecute you: bless, and curse not.  Rejoice with them that rejoice; weep with them that weep. Being of one mind one towards another. Not minding high things, but consenting to the humble. Be not wise in your own conceits. To no man rendering evil for evil. Providing good things, not only in the sight of God, but also in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as is in you, have peace with all men. Revenge not yourselves, my dearly beloved; but give place unto wrath, for it is written: Revenge is mine, I will repay, saith the Lord. But if thy enemy be hungry, give him to eat; if he thirst, give him to drink. For, doing this, thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head. Be not overcome by evil, but overcome evil by good.”

I just purchased that jeanne dvorak book from ebay.  I am looking forward to reading it.  

It is interesting to note that, at all the trad chapels I have been to, trad cath young men fall all over the liberally-dressed young ladies at church and then marry them, while the modest young ladies go unnoticed and unmarried.
Is it woman's fault men LOOK for loose women?  
...

Fanny,

Some of these trad cath young men do fall in love with beautiful attractive women, and as part of their engagement period, these same young trad catholics lovingly tell their fiancées to start dressing modestly.

Funny you should mention this.

When I was dating eligible young men, and when I mentioned the scarcity of eligible young Catholic men, my priest told me that he thought it was my goal in life to meet a good handsome Protestant man, help convert him, and then marry him..  The priest  reminded me of the Epistle of St. James, which encourages us to lead others to the Holy Faith, and thus, save our souls and theirs in the process.  This is indeed what happened. Read on.

In a true marriage, the couples should lead each other to Christ. In fact, not only is the marriage bed to be undefiled, but also the children are to be raised to be saints. In a true domestic church, all are called to sanctity with the husband taking the role as spiritual leader in his family, leading the prayers, and setting a good example for the children.

In a study done for his Master's of Divinity, a priest studied the effect a father has on his children. If the father regularly attended Mass and other services at the parish church, and faithfully led prayers in the home, his children became very devout and followed his example.  If the father did not lead the prayers at home and made excuses not to attend church whenever possible, even if his wife was faithful in her prayer life and church duties, their children were not devout, and often did not remain Catholic.

My confessor also gave youth retreats and encouraged young men and women to seek beautiful spouses who needed to be enlightened by the Holy Faith. His reasoning: men are attracted to beautiful women and once these handsome men win the hand of a beautiful young maiden, she will listen to him and will start dressing more modestly, etc. Furthermore, beautiful women -- beautiful in heart, mind, body, and soul -- will attract good men. These men in turn will want to know the source of their inward beauty. This happened with me. My husband asked what church I attended, started attending that parish with me, and soon he became a catechumen. He was baptized, confirmed, and communed on St. Dominic's day, his patron saint, one month prior to our marriage. He said that it was the most awesome experience.

I just purchased that jeanne dvorak book from ebay.  I am looking forward to reading it.  

You won't regret it.