The young men (and women) have not really had trials in life. Going to "Church n' stuff" are not objective every-day trials. Spiritual, mental, and physical... Us trads def. lack in the mental and physical department. This is my observation. The tough love is not being administered. Waiting until even you're 18, is wayyyyy to late. This ties into what OP was saying about taking care of your body. The first thing you have to do when you go out into the world is be able to walk, maybe run..., push, pull, function physiologically.. A healthy, attractive body, shows the "ability of capability" as a man or woman.
The most disciplined people I've ever met in the work force, are the ones who maybe work an well paying desk job, and make it a duty to exercise and live a balanced lifestyle, diet, etc.
If the job thing is lacking for the young man, it's because they are LAZY... There are TOO many resources, too many avenues of potential to say otherwise, at least here in the U.S.. If they are up and coming, working hard, then that's another thing. I think LAD or Matthew said, you have to be savvy, too. Take the "keeping up with the Joneses" and throw that out the window, it will destroy your outlook on Catholic family duties.
Personally, I've been through the wringer to get where I am at today, so forgive me if my empathy on this subject is kind of low.
OP if you are looking for a Godly masculine spouse, you really have to put yourself out there and be inviting to the man you want. Don't have to pursue, but be inviting to the guy you want/need.