Author Topic: wife rejects natural family planning  (Read 16177 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Capt McQuigg

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4669
  • Reputation: +2622/-10
  • Gender: Male
wife rejects natural family planning
« Reply #165 on: August 03, 2013, 02:21:41 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Gregg is just giving Gooch a hard time now and confusing him.  

    Offline Matto

    • Hero Member
    • *****
    • Posts: 5708
    • Reputation: +3109/-145
    • Gender: Male
    • Love God and Play, Do Good Work and Pray
      • Julian Moore
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #166 on: August 03, 2013, 04:09:55 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: gooch
    but if I do give in then for sure I save my marriage, but at what cost..my soul?
    I Love Watching Butterflies . . ..


    Offline TCat

    • Jr. Member
    • **
    • Posts: 269
    • Reputation: +134/-0
    • Gender: Male
      • h
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #167 on: August 05, 2013, 02:21:00 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • I don't have experience of this topic BUT this entire conversation is proof that devout Catholics ought only to marry other devout Catholics, otherwise the inevietable problems happen, especially with one side trying to maintain their Catholic identity regarding conjugical relations, something Catholics are very strict on for our own good. The modern world corrupts people with the notions of his wife, just shows that faith needs to be rock solid in both. If she would not convert I would not bother with her if that was me.
    Crux Sacra Sit Mihi Lux! Ne Draco Sit Mihi Dux!

    Offline Ursus

    • Jr. Member
    • **
    • Posts: 317
    • Reputation: +137/-2
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #168 on: August 07, 2013, 11:41:48 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: gooch
    Quote from: ggreg


    Why would she?  She has an IUD she is hardly going to worry about masturbation and you are not with her 24x7.

    And finally Gooch, if she's not going to leave you then why post in the first place?  Stop kidding yourself.  When a woman throws the word divorce around it means she's thought about it.

    Best of luck, I have a weekend of stuff to do.


    it has nothing to do with the emotional support for a 4th child, she's feeling run down and tired, but if I do give in then for sure I save my marriage, but at what cost..my soul? as for her not leaving this is what I feel, she's threatened but I don't think she'll pull the trigger, but if I do nothing she will continue to be miserable which I don't want, this is the pickle I'm in


    I do think this is a good topic and a personal trouble that we can all hopefully learn from.

    If your wife was sick, would you leave her? Of course not. It's a similar situation with a crisis of faith.

    Listen to her, love her, encourage to undo the problem BUT don't be forceful and overbearing. You don't want her to pull back more. Yes, what she's doing is wrong.

    Your soul is not in danger if you're intimate with her so get that out of your head.

    Don't push her away or deny her affection. Fulfill your role as a husband in all respects.

    Offline Christopher67

    • Jr. Member
    • **
    • Posts: 323
    • Reputation: +190/-2
    • Gender: Male
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #169 on: August 07, 2013, 11:54:13 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Was her intention the same on your wedding day?


    Offline parentsfortruth

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3822
    • Reputation: +2660/-3
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #170 on: August 08, 2013, 10:59:07 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: Ursus
    Quote from: gooch
    Quote from: ggreg


    Why would she?  She has an IUD she is hardly going to worry about masturbation and you are not with her 24x7.

    And finally Gooch, if she's not going to leave you then why post in the first place?  Stop kidding yourself.  When a woman throws the word divorce around it means she's thought about it.

    Best of luck, I have a weekend of stuff to do.


    it has nothing to do with the emotional support for a 4th child, she's feeling run down and tired, but if I do give in then for sure I save my marriage, but at what cost..my soul? as for her not leaving this is what I feel, she's threatened but I don't think she'll pull the trigger, but if I do nothing she will continue to be miserable which I don't want, this is the pickle I'm in


    I do think this is a good topic and a personal trouble that we can all hopefully learn from.

    If your wife was sick, would you leave her? Of course not. It's a similar situation with a crisis of faith.

    Listen to her, love her, encourage to undo the problem BUT don't be forceful and overbearing. You don't want her to pull back more. Yes, what she's doing is wrong.

    Your soul is not in danger if you're intimate with her so get that out of your head.

    Don't push her away or deny her affection. Fulfill your role as a husband in all respects.


    You know what an IUD does? It can kill a baby. He's doing the right thing not sleeping with her right now. If a baby does try to implant, she's murdering a child if it doesn't.
    Matthew 5:37

    But let your speech be yea, yea: no, no: and that which is over and above these, is of evil.

    My Avatar is Fr. Hector Bolduc. He was a faithful parish priest in De Pere, WI,

    Offline Raphaela

    • Jr. Member
    • **
    • Posts: 265
    • Reputation: +360/-22
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #171 on: August 09, 2013, 05:21:41 AM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: gooch
    found this, although I don't put too much stock in it
    http://churchmilitant.tumblr.com/sexquestions

    4 - Are both spouses guilty of a mortal sin if one chooses to use a contraceptive against the others will?

    No. If a man decides to have a vasectomy against his wife’s will, she may still have sex with him and not be guilty. Likewise, if a woman is taking birth control pills against a husband’s wished, he may still have sex with her and remain guilt free.

    Pius XI teaches the same thing in Casti Connubii:

    "59. Holy Church knows well that not infrequently one of the parties is sinned against rather than sinning, when for a grave cause he or she reluctantly allows the perversion of the right order. In such a case, there is no sin, provided that, mindful of the law of charity, he or she does not neglect to seek to dissuade and to deter the partner from sin."

    http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/pius_xi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-xi_enc_31121930_casti-connubii_en.html

    Notice an effort to correct the spouse must be made, even if it doesn't succeed. If there is no practical change, keep praying that she has a change of heart. There's nothing more you can do. But there's no obligation to abstain.

     If your conscience still troubles you, talk to a priest for reassurance (don't go near a Novus Ordo priest, and find an absolutely traditional one who teaches that NFP can only be used for a grave reason). He will tell you the same as Pius XI, but it often helps to have a priest's personal assurance that you are doing nothing wrong, and he may pray for your wife as well. Have a Mass said for your intention (that your wife stops using this method).  

    Offline Telesphorus

    • Hero Member
    • *****
    • Posts: 12714
    • Reputation: +7/-12
    • Gender: Male
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #172 on: August 09, 2013, 05:25:54 AM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • What if a man knew his wife would have an abortion if she got pregnant by him?

    While it's certainly true one does not sin in paying the marriage debt to a sinning spouse, it is casuistry that ignores some pretty serious moral issues to simply say "no sin" regardless of the circumstances.


    Offline parentsfortruth

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3822
    • Reputation: +2660/-3
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #173 on: August 09, 2013, 11:38:22 AM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: Raphaela
    Quote from: gooch
    found this, although I don't put too much stock in it
    http://churchmilitant.tumblr.com/sexquestions

    4 - Are both spouses guilty of a mortal sin if one chooses to use a contraceptive against the others will?

    No. If a man decides to have a vasectomy against his wife’s will, she may still have sex with him and not be guilty. Likewise, if a woman is taking birth control pills against a husband’s wished, he may still have sex with her and remain guilt free.

    Pius XI teaches the same thing in Casti Connubii:

    "59. Holy Church knows well that not infrequently one of the parties is sinned against rather than sinning, when for a grave cause he or she reluctantly allows the perversion of the right order. In such a case, there is no sin, provided that, mindful of the law of charity, he or she does not neglect to seek to dissuade and to deter the partner from sin."

    http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/pius_xi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-xi_enc_31121930_casti-connubii_en.html

    Notice an effort to correct the spouse must be made, even if it doesn't succeed. If there is no practical change, keep praying that she has a change of heart. There's nothing more you can do. But there's no obligation to abstain.

     If your conscience still troubles you, talk to a priest for reassurance (don't go near a Novus Ordo priest, and find an absolutely traditional one who teaches that NFP can only be used for a grave reason). He will tell you the same as Pius XI, but it often helps to have a priest's personal assurance that you are doing nothing wrong, and he may pray for your wife as well. Have a Mass said for your intention (that your wife stops using this method).  


    Was the IUD out when Pius XI was pope? Only the pill was, methinks. The pill simply stops ovulation. The IUD murders an embryo (with an immortal soul) that cannot attach to the mother's womb because of the device.

    They weren't even widely used until the 1950s because of the problems associated with them, infections, et cetera. No one in their right minds were using them, and certainly no doctor would have given the recommendation to use them at that time.
    Matthew 5:37

    But let your speech be yea, yea: no, no: and that which is over and above these, is of evil.

    My Avatar is Fr. Hector Bolduc. He was a faithful parish priest in De Pere, WI,

    Offline ggreg

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3002
    • Reputation: +177/-175
    • Gender: Male
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #174 on: August 09, 2013, 12:11:56 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Some homonal BC pills are abortifacient also.

    Hormonal contraception ascribes a three-fold action to these agents.  1. inhibition of ovulation, 2. inhibition of sperm transport, and 3. production of a ‘hostile endometrium’, which prevents or disrupts implantation of the developing baby if the first two mechanisms fail.

    Offline parentsfortruth

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3822
    • Reputation: +2660/-3
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #175 on: August 09, 2013, 03:06:59 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: ggreg
    Some homonal BC pills are abortifacient also.

    Hormonal contraception ascribes a three-fold action to these agents.  1. inhibition of ovulation, 2. inhibition of sperm transport, and 3. production of a ‘hostile endometrium’, which prevents or disrupts implantation of the developing baby if the first two mechanisms fail.


    I doubt any traditional priest would advise, knowing what an IUD does, to continue having relations with a wife if she's that self loathing of herself to do that.
    Matthew 5:37

    But let your speech be yea, yea: no, no: and that which is over and above these, is of evil.

    My Avatar is Fr. Hector Bolduc. He was a faithful parish priest in De Pere, WI,


    Offline Capt McQuigg

    • Hero Member
    • *****
    • Posts: 4669
    • Reputation: +2622/-10
    • Gender: Male
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #176 on: August 09, 2013, 05:50:35 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • If the wife continues to use an IUD, the husband may be forced to live separately.  A separation would be for his spiritual welfare.  A wife who is anti-life, or pro-death, is to be shunned.  

    It's not permitted to divorce and remarry but separation is perfectly acceptable.  

    If this isn't feasible, then the husband should sleep in a separate bedroom and avoid his wife as much as possible.  

    I don't want to say that there are times when a man needs to cut his losses because these are issues a man has to work out to his own satisfaction befoer he even asks a lady to marry him.




    Offline parentsfortruth

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3822
    • Reputation: +2660/-3
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #177 on: August 09, 2013, 06:18:18 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: Capt McQuigg
    If the wife continues to use an IUD, the husband may be forced to live separately.  A separation would be for his spiritual welfare.  A wife who is anti-life, or pro-death, is to be shunned.  

    It's not permitted to divorce and remarry but separation is perfectly acceptable.  

    If this isn't feasible, then the husband should sleep in a separate bedroom and avoid his wife as much as possible.  

    I don't want to say that there are times when a man needs to cut his losses because these are issues a man has to work out to his own satisfaction befoer he even asks a lady to marry him.





    Capt. Remember, he's a recent convert, so go easy on his choice.
    Matthew 5:37

    But let your speech be yea, yea: no, no: and that which is over and above these, is of evil.

    My Avatar is Fr. Hector Bolduc. He was a faithful parish priest in De Pere, WI,

    Offline Tiffany

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3111
    • Reputation: +1639/-28
    • Gender: Female
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #178 on: August 09, 2013, 06:40:59 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: Capt McQuigg
    If the wife continues to use an IUD, the husband may be forced to live separately.  A separation would be for his spiritual welfare.  A wife who is anti-life, or pro-death, is to be shunned.  

    It's not permitted to divorce and remarry but separation is perfectly acceptable.  

    If this isn't feasible, then the husband should sleep in a separate bedroom and avoid his wife as much as possible.  

    I don't want to say that there are times when a man needs to cut his losses because these are issues a man has to work out to his own satisfaction befoer he even asks a lady to marry him.



    In general if you seperate you may need a civil divorce to protect your right to your children. Unfortunately we don't live in a Christian society that respects the family.

    For those criticizing his choice remember people can be influenced by evil and change.  A major problem is her family and this culture. I guarantee if it was her and gooch without comm with family and media things would be different.

    Offline Ursus

    • Jr. Member
    • **
    • Posts: 317
    • Reputation: +137/-2
    wife rejects natural family planning
    « Reply #179 on: August 09, 2013, 09:49:22 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Quote from: parentsfortruth


    I doubt any traditional priest would advise, knowing what an IUD does, to continue having relations with a wife if she's that self loathing of herself to do that.


    I got down voted before, but trust St Paul and the good Bishop on this. The unbeliving wife is sanctified by the believing husband.

    Crisis of faith, same thing. His story here is about an atheist who ended up becoming a priest after his wife died, 19:00 mark here:


     

    Sitemap 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16