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Author Topic: What it means to be a mother  (Read 641 times)

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Offline Matthew

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What it means to be a mother
« on: October 24, 2008, 10:51:02 AM »
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  • THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES

    Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and
    3 kids each for six weeks.

    Each kid will play
    two sports
    and either take music
    or dance classes.

    There is no fast food.

    Each man must
    take care of his 3 kids;
    keep his assigned house clean,
    correct all homework,
    and complete science projects,
    cook, do laundry,
    and pay a list of 'pretend' bills
    with not enough money.

    In addition, each man
    will have to budget in money
    for groceries each week.

    Each man
    must remember the birthdays
    of all their friends and relatives,
    and send cards out
    on time--no emailing.

    Each man must also
    take each child to a doctor's appointment,
    a dentist appointment
    and a haircut appointment.

    He must make
    one unscheduled and inconvenient
    visit per child
    to the Urgent Care.

    He must also
    make cookies or cupcakes
    for a social function.

    Each man will be responsible for
    decorating his own assigned house,
    planting flowers outside
    and keeping it presentable
    at all times.

    The men will only
    have access to television
    when the kids are asleep
    and all chores are done.

    The men must
    shave their legs,
    wear makeup daily,
    adorn himself with Jєωelry,
    wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes,
    keep fingernails polished
    and eyebrows groomed.

    During one of the six weeks,
    the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches,
    and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or
    slow down from other duties.

    They must attend
    weekly school meetings,
    church, and find time
    at least once to spend the afternoon
    at the park or a similar setting.

    They will need to
    read a book to the kids
    each night and in the morning,
    feed them, dress them,
    brush their teeth and
    comb their hair by 7:00 am.

    A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information:
    each child's birthday,
    height, weight,
    shoe size, clothes size
    and doctor's name.
    Also the child's weight at birth,
    length, time of birth,
    and length of labor,
    each child's favorite color ,
    middle name,
    favorite snack,
    favorite song,
    favorite drink,
    favorite toy,
    biggest fear and
    what they want to be when they grow up.

    The kids vote them off the island
    based on performance.
    The last man wins only if...
    he still has enough energy
    to be intimate with his spouse
    at a moment's notice.

    If the last man does win,
    he can play the game over and over
    and over again for the next 18-25 years
    eventually earning the right
    To be called Mother!

    After you get done laughing,
    send this to as many females as you
    think will get a kick out of it and
    as many men as you think can
    handle it.
    Want to say "thank you"? 
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    Offline Matthew

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    What it means to be a mother
    « Reply #1 on: October 24, 2008, 10:53:04 AM »
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  • What I don't like about this list -- it makes it sound like being a mother is for some kind of hero or superwoman. Unfortunately, many women don't consider themselves that super -- a few have the temperament to take on great challenges, etc. but some get discouraged VERY easily.

    So I think we need to edit that list down, and make a CATHOLIC version. For example, wearing uncomfortable shoes, makeup, etc. is NOT necessary (my wife doesn't do either) and the kids do NOT need to be involved with 3 activities each. That's suburbia, not a Catholic way of life. When you have enough kids, they keep EACH OTHER entertained and stimulated.

    Have at it!
    Want to say "thank you"? 
    You can send me a gift from my Amazon wishlist!
    https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/25M2B8RERL1UO

    Paypal donations: matthew@chantcd.com