(RealSimple.com) -- How does $369,360 per child sound?

According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, that's the average for the essentials through age 17.

To find out where that money goes, here's a financial snapshot of three families to offer a candid look at some of their biggest expenses and best strategies for saving.

RealSimple.com: Save money all year long

The Lyon family

Monthly kid-related expenses: food, $1,050... gas, $500... travel (for sports), $225... medical, $200... clothing, $140... sports, $125... entertainment and toys, $85... school fees, $28.

Who we are: Kate, 33; Greg, 36; Luke, 9; and John Patrick, 7.

Where we live: Hattiesburg, Mississippi.

What we do: Greg is an account executive at a paper and supplies company; Kate is a stay-at-home mom who's working on starting her own business.

Biggest recent change in our finances: Kate was laid off from her COO position in sports marketing last year. "So we're living on one income. We switched our boys from private to public school, which saves on tuition, and we no longer have to pay for after-school care."

We never thought we'd spend so much on... "Sports and food. The boys play baseball, football, soccer -- you name it. And the gear is expensive. And of course, they're always hungry. It is amazing how much two growing boys eat in a week."

RealSimple.com: Organizing your sports equipment

For example, we just bought... A 40-pack of Capri Sun for $6.83 and four gallons of milk for $12.32. "Those will last a week, maybe. Sometimes we have to run out for more milk."

Small ways we save

• Kate hits Sam's Club every Monday morning. "We sometimes clip coupons. But the bulk stores aren't always cheapest. The local grocery often has better deals on soda."

• The boys constantly need new shoes. "They wear them out. We've found the pricier name brands -- we like New Balance -- last longer, so we save in the long run."

More ways they can save

Trade in clothes. The KidVantage Club program at Sears, which includes clothes from Lands' End, allows you to exchange items that wear out before they're outgrown, so the Lyons could get spanking-new pants as needed. Sign up at any Sears register.

Get Twitter coupons. Cheaptweet.com puts deals and discounts from Twitter in one place. For example, Kate could search "baseball" and find tweets about websites and stores having sporting-goods sales.

RealSimple.com: 10 ways to spend smarter

Fuel up midweek. Kate spends a couple of hours daily driving between school and practices." She should fill up on gas on Wednesdays or Thursdays. There's less traffic, so stations lower prices to attract business," says financial expert Farnoosh Torabi, author of "Psych Yourself Rich". Other gas-saving tips: Turn the engine off instead of idling, and clean out the trunk. Extra weight burns fuel.

The Welch family

Monthly kid-related expenses: food, $1,300... insurance, $1,000... activities, $800... travel, $500... savings, $400... gas, $300... entertainment and toys, $200... clothing, $40... tooth fairy, $5.

Who we are: Grace, 43; Marty, 46; Patrick, 10; Emma, 8; Jack, 5; and Lucie, 2.

Where we live: Providence, Rhode Island.

What we do: We own Patemm Inc., which makes and sells baby-changing pads.

Biggest recent change in our finances: "This year we moved the family from San Francisco to Providence to save money. We downsized from a house to an apartment, the kids go to public school, and we work from home -- less overhead!"

RealSimple.com: When Does It Make Sense to Rent, Not Buy?

We never thought we'd spend so much on... "Holidays. The Christmas frenzy gets us every year, even when we try to stick to a budget. And activities for four kids add up fast. Patrick is a junior golfer, so he and Marty travel for tournaments."

For example, we just bought... A golf glove for Patrick ($12) and swimming lessons for Emma ($100 for the month).

Small ways we save

• Drive-in movies. "It costs so much less than buying tickets for everyone in the family, and we can eat our own food." (Go to drive-ins.com to find a theater in your area.)

• "When we eat at restaurants, which isn't often, Jack and Lucie almost always share a meal."

• "We love the library. We hit it for books, audiobooks, and movies, and we almost never buy or rent."

More ways they can save

Travel in herds. With four kids, vacations (not including golf tournaments) are hard for the Welches. Torabi suggests adding to the clan -- invite family and friends -- and then negotiating a group hotel rate. "You can get up to 30 percent off," she says. Or sign up for jetsetter.com, a new site that offers hotel discounts.

RealSimple.com: 5 ways to save time in the morning

Put Santa on a budget. Or lessen the strain on holiday cash flow by using credit-card points to shop. "You may not have enough for two plane tickets, but you have plenty to buy toys," says Torabi. An Xbox Live subscription is only 6,908 American Express Membership Rewards points; a Lego watch is 4,100.

Let someone else do the work. Grace comparison-shops and uses coupons, but time is, well, money. The website moneysavingmom.com is a great resource for deals (printable coupons for McDonald's and Barnes & Noble) and tips.

The Simmons family

Monthly kid-related expenses: day care, $1,770... diapers and wipes, $75... food, $60... babysitting, $50... baby equipment, $50... clothing, $40... medical, $25... entertainment and toys, $25... savings, $25... activities, $5.

Who we are: Shannon, 29; Matt, 29; and Lorelai, 10 months.

Where we live: Bethesda, Maryland.

What we do: Matt is in public relations; Shannon works in operations for Teach for America.

Biggest recent change in our finances: Besides having a baby? "We just bought a condo, so now we have a mortgage. But it's our only debt besides some small remaining student loans, so we feel secure about that. And we do a rigorous budget every month, putting money into short- and long-term savings, retirement, and a college fund for Lorelai."

RealSimple.com: On-the-go baby toys

We never thought we'd spend so much on... "Day care. We were shocked by the cost -- it's a substantial chunk of our income. Also, the baby moves into new stages so quickly, and it seems like we have to buy her all new stuff every month."

For example, we just bought... Baby-food storage containers (since Lorelai is eating solids now) and a rain cover for the stroller. Total cost: $40.

Small ways we save

• "We cut our newspaper subscription and movie channels. We don't have time for them anyway."

• Hosting dinner parties. "They're fun and less expensive than going out and paying for a sitter."

• "We make Lorelai's food instead of buying it packaged. Often it's out of our own leftovers, so she gets good food, and we don't waste anything."

More ways they can save

Don't stress about college. Matt and Shannon struggle with prioritizing their savings. Focus on contributions to an emergency fund or to the 529 college savings plan for Lorelai? "Definitely an emergency fund," says Torabi. "You need liquid assets available for unexpected costs, especially with a child. Have six to eight months of savings before you even think about college." Waiting until the baby is in school isn't the end of the world, either. "You can adjust the risk level of your investments depending on how many years until college," says Torabi.

RealSimple.com: How to save $5,000 this year

Stop the impulse buys. Shannon has a weakness for cute girls' clothes (see adorable baby, above). But nonessentials add up. To keep from browsing, she should try buying basics online (diapers.com sells detergent, too). And in stores use cash instead of a credit card. "She'll be far less likely to load up," says Torabi.

how about drink more water and look for sales-I got 10 for $10 on SoBe 0 calories drinks and good to go....plastic bottle

$1,050.00 per month for 2 little boys and 2 adults food in Mississippi?  

Dang.  I wonder what's for din-din down there tonight?  :ready-to-eat:  Maybe they add nice wine to the grocery bill?

I think we save some money fasting, and we never have steaks.  The people next door are grilling some right now  :scared2: and they smell delicious.

CathMom, a whole chicken is a wonderful thing!  Also, chicken is much healthier when whole.

I am so hungry right now!

I really couldn't tell you how much we spend on food alone because I don't seperate out household items in my record keeping and my freezer is regularly more or less full depending on how good the sales have been.

But, as an example of what frugality can do for you, I can tell you that a blogger I follow (Money Saving Mom) has basically an equivalent family right now (2 adults, 3 little kids) and she spends $40/wk to feed them. This does not include their dining out which is once per week. I don't think we could pull that off because we probably eat a bit more junk than they do, but it can be done.

How do you do that??

When I was living on my own in college, I spent at least $500/mo on food! It was so hard to cut back my food expenses!

I cook from scratch and buy in large packages.  I make weekly meal plans and seldom by junk food.  One bag of potato chips is $3 and it will be gone in my house in less that 10 minutes.  On sale, I can get 10lb of potatoes for $3.  Out of one bag, I can make a huge pot of soup, french fries, and mashed potatoes.  That's enough for 3 meals.  5lb of hamburger covers 2 meals of tacos and spaghetti with 4 guarter pound hamburgers for the freezer for quick meals.  I can buy a large bag of dried beans for $1 and add rice.  I make biscuits, cornbread, and cinnamon rolls all from scratch.  Cookies, ice cream, and candy are special treats usually reserved for Sundays.  We rarely have soda except for weekends or picnics.  I can toss one large chicken in a huge pot and boil it.  I use every bit of the meat which can get me 3 good meals---chicken spaghetti, chicken and rice, chicken soup or chicken pot pie.  I keep all leftovers and serve them to the children for lunch the next day.  Thursday is left-over night if there is anything left.  It can be done, but it takes commitment to actually plan, prepare, and cook meals.  One cannot eat frugally on potato chips, pre-packaged meals, soda, and fast-food.  It will seriously break one's budget AND destroy one's health.  

how about drink more water and look for sales-I got 10 for $10 on SoBe 0 calories drinks and good to go....plastic bottle

Saving money with plastic water bottles - now I've heard it all.

Goose, most of those "Lifestyle" articles make me sick--and anxious, too!

It is partly the writing style, but the whole cultural thing is just so lost, so desolate and far from a path to Heaven.

All the more reason to go "back to the land", if that's what it takes to convince people to have the children God wants them to have.

Matthew