Hello! I have a bunch of questions about more traditional Catholicism (any traditional Catholic please feel free to answer but it would be extremely helpful if you specify which type you are: i.e. SSPX).
Background: I was raised Catholic, but I've delayed my confirmation because I didn't want to be made a full "adult member of the Church" without fully understanding the ramifications of that decision. I have several members of my extended family who are traditional Catholics; many who wear the veil, don't wear pants, homeschool, etc. as well as a Dominican sister and a priest. (Those are just the people that I know of, since my family is rather large.) However, my brothers and I were raised less traditionally as my dad chose to be confirmed Catholic only upon meeting my mom (he was raised half-Catholic and half-Methodist and was deciding between the two). We go to church every week and try to dress modestly in general, but I wasn't raised with the same theological knowledge as my extended family or even my mother. The more strict rules of certain traditional Catholics are something of which I'm completely unaware. So, I have questions!
1. Attire: I know that shoulders need to be covered during mass and that we need to dress nicely and modestly. However, based on some comments here, it seems like cap sleeves are something particularly offensive to traditional Catholics. Is this true? If yes, why?
2. Attire-- Occasions: For special occasions which involve a religious ceremony (i.e. a wedding, baptism, etc.), what are the requirements? Specifically, what are the requirements for sleeves? It seems like many of the mainstream sources online require only that shoulders be covered (or they provide a very vague description which is not at all helpful). What are the sleeve requirements for you and why? Also, is a lower back acceptable, and how low would be considered indecent to you? If a veil is covering one's back or arms, does this affect your answer? Lastly, and this is for weddings specifically, are tea-length dresses appropriate for a bride?
3. Cohabitation: I feel like I should begin this with a disclaimer that I am not in fact cohabiting with anyone; this is an abstract question at this point. Is living in the same house or apartment as a significant other before marriage acceptable in traditional Catholicism, so long as the couple reside in separate bedrooms and aren't engaging in behaviors reserved for married people? This could be for either monetary reasons or health reasons. That last one concerns me particularly: I have some rather persistent asthma that still isn't controlled after two decades. Because my symptoms are worst between 2 and 6am, my boyfriend and my mother have both expressed concerns about me living alone. Frankly, I don't blame them, but I don't like the way living with a significant other would look, especially if it would affect my membership within a particular church.
Okay! That's it. Detailed answers (and answers to all the sub-questions) would be much appreciated, but do what you can. Not everybody has 30 minutes to type out a response. :-\