Author Topic: Traditional Catholic wife criteria (Read 6263 times)

Cantarella · « **Reply #5 on:** February 10, 2017, 05:28:14 PM »

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I suppose the criteria for a good Catholic husband would be:

1) He truly follows Catholic faith and morals.
2) He must have a good trade to support a family.
3) He is open to the number of children God sends.
4) He leads the family.
5) He has a sound decorum

I agree with this list. Number 1 being the most important, of course. I would add he NOT having any addictions, which is a major red flag. Additions to anything, alcohol, drugs, video games, and other unchaste vices, too filthy to even mention here.

Also, not being "feminized", like the classic "pajama boy", but a real man who does not expect his wife to go to work, help pay the bills, equal house chores, believer in equal rights, etc....in sum, all the ultra-egalitarian nonsense of modern times.

JezusDeKoning · « **Reply #6 on:** February 10, 2017, 07:13:35 PM »

Quote from: Cantarella

Quote
I suppose the criteria for a good Catholic husband would be:

1) He truly follows Catholic faith and morals.
2) He must have a good trade to support a family.
3) He is open to the number of children God sends.
4) He leads the family.
5) He has a sound decorum

I agree with this list. Number 1 being the most important, of course. I would add he NOT having any addictions, which is a major red flag. Additions to anything, alcohol, drugs, video games, and other unchaste vices, too filthy to even mention here.

Also, not being "feminized", like the classic "pajama boy", but a real man who does not expect his wife to go to work, help pay the bills, equal house chores, believer in equal rights, etc....in sum, all the ultra-egalitarian nonsense of modern times.

I would hope that the man contributes to house chores, too. Otherwise, he's a spoiled child if he expects his wife to do all the cooking and cleaning.

St Ignatius · « **Reply #7 on:** February 10, 2017, 07:39:27 PM »

Quote from: JezusDeKoning

I would hope that the man contributes to house chores, too. Otherwise, he's a spoiled child if he expects his wife to do all the cooking and cleaning.

And... next, I suppose you'll say that the wife is a spoiled brat if she doesn't leave her children alone while she changes the oil in the car, fixes the leaky roof, chops firewood, shovels the sidewalk of snow, fixes the lawnmower...

Kephapaulos · « **Reply #8 on:** February 10, 2017, 08:03:50 PM »

Quote from: Cantarella

I had posted a link no long ago with a list of 12 "warning signs" for men wanting to find a wife:

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"If you want to be happily married, discern women carefully. Being pretty, young, and Christian is not enough. She may be the most beautiful woman that you have ever seen, but turn away if you encounter any of the following:

1.“I am a strong independent woman.”

2.“My career comes first.”

3.“I don’t want to be ‘just a mom.‘”

4.“I’m not a bra-burning Feminist, but I do think Feminism has been a good thing.” (This is akin to the argument: “Planned Parenthood does some good things so let’s not condemn it.”)

5.She scorns films that aren’t Bechdel-approved.

6.She insists on paying her half of the tab.

7.She looks down on courtesies that you provide, such as opening the door, driving, and paying, as insults.

8.She advocates government policies that promote sterilization, Planned Parenthood, no-fault divorce, slut-walks, women’s reproductive rights, etc.

9.Profuse profanity. Every Feminist I have ever met has been generous with profanity. They love dropping the f-bomb, in particular. I suspect Feminists believe that this is “empowering” or makes them “like one of the guys.” In reality, it’s ugly and degrading.

10.She shows annoyance around babies or small children.

11.She makes fun of her father by mocking him.

12.She frequently uses the word “patriarchy,” but she is not referring to the bishops of Antioch, Moscow, or Constantinople.

http://maccabeesociety.com/never-date-a-feminist-12-warning-signs-for-young-men/

There are so many who have one of those characteristics, and so it should not be too hard to find virtuous women then.

AMDGJMJ · « **Reply #9 on:** February 10, 2017, 08:04:49 PM »

Quote from: Kephapaulos

Most men and women may not fulfill the criteria, but the problem is also that most are not open to improvement according to them. My neck of the woods appears not to have the type of women you pointed out, Arsenius, particularly at my own SSPX chapel. Two girls there are more independent, two did not care to know me, and one is just obsessed about me and won't leave me and my friend alone. You and Matthew give me hope still.
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It is true that there are many people out there who are not open to improving themselves and expect their partner to do all the compromising. Selflessness is certainly a virtue that is helpful to have a bit of before considering marriage, and both spouses need it in order to have a truly happy marriage life. All the same, I have met many good traditional Catholic women out there who follow all of these criteria completely and perhaps even a bit beyond.

Here is something that you might want to consider... The SSPX do not generally speak out against women wearing pants or shorter skirts as long as they fall to the knee. So, you will tend to find girls who wear pants and knee high skirts at many SSPX chapels.

I have noticed that a number of other places, including the CMRI and some independent chapels which I have been to, often speak out about women wearing longer dresses, and in turn, the women there tend to dress more unto that end. Just something to consider.

As for the girl who is obsessed with you... If she looks up to you and your friend THAT much perhaps God has allowed this for a reason. Maybe you could do her some good and help her become the sort of woman you might want her to be? Then, even if it is not meant for you both to be a couple you would have at least helped her for her future husband? No one is perfect and everyone has their faults. I have friends whose changed and became better Catholics because of their spouses.

You seem to be a good man. So, completely trust yourself into God's Hands and I am sure that He will work everything out in the best way possible for you. Here is a little something that a friend shared with me, and which I find very profound for those considering the married state. It helped me a lot when about a year ago when I had a terrible break-up. Hopefully it will help you too!

God bless!

Treatise attributed to Saint Anthony

Everyone longs to give himself completely to someone –
To have a deep soul relationship with another.
To be loved thoroughly and exclusively.
But God, to the Christian, says,
“No, not until you are satisfied with living for Me
And have an intensely personal and unique relationship
With me alone.
I love you, My child,
And until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction,
You will not be capable of the perfect human relationship
That I have planned for you.
I want you to stop planning and stop wanting,
And allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan ever existing –
One that you cannot even imagine.
I want you to have the best.
Please allow me to bring it to you –
Just keep watching Me,
Expecting the greatest things –
Keep experiencing that satisfaction in Me,
Knowing that I Am –
Keep learning from and listening to the things that I tell you.
You must wait.
Don’t be anxious.
Don’t worry…
Don’t look around at the things others have gained for themselves
Or that I have given them.
Don’t look at the things you want.
Just keep looking to Me
Or you will miss what I want to show you.
And then,
When you are ready,
I will surprise you with a love far more wonderful
Than any you would ever dream of.
You see, until you are ready,
(And even now I desire to have you both ready at the same time)
Until you are both satisfied with Me
You won’t be able to experience
The love that exemplifies your relationship with Me –
And thus is perfect love.
And, dear one,
I want you to have this most wonderful love
I want you to have in the flesh
A picture of your relationship with Me
And to enjoy the everlasting union of beauty and love.
I am God.
Believe and be satisfied.”

_______________________________________________________________________
http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/2016/04/true-love-is-only-found-in-and-through.html