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Author Topic: Traditional Catholic Dating site!  (Read 10129 times)

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Offline Pax Vobis

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Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2024, 01:05:23 PM »
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    • I agree that Feeneyism should just be ignored.  Let people work that out themselves.

    I would suggest that some of your questions be expanded - a) Sedevacantism, b) non-Sede, c) other, unsure.  (lots of your questions need a 3rd option)

    Lots of Trads in the dating realm (especially women) don't want to "pick sides" and limit their options.  "Unsure" is a very normal answer, in our times.  And practically speaking, i've known many couples who were "Trad-ecuмenical" (i.e. sspx/sspv, sspx/indult, sspx/feeneyite, etc, etc).  Not every Trad draws a hard line in the sand on these issues.  Some of this is good, some of it is bad.  At the end of the day, it's their decision.
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    Offline Mr G

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #16 on: March 04, 2024, 01:13:55 PM »
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    • Quote from: Xenophon on March 04, 2024, 11:57:50 AM


    1.) Also, the aesthetic I'm going for isn't even that novel. There's an old painting you all would know called American Gothic, it's essentially what I'm going for.

    2.)There's a reason younger people find tradcats so out of touch. I've personally spoken to many guys wanting to convert or have recently converted that find Catholicism dull and entirely dominated by boomers. I'm trying to show people that it's not necessarily the case.

    1.) having art depict a certain somber mood is fine for the sake of art or to convey a mood, but remember your websites is not about art (plus it is bad art anyway, at least put the natural colors back). It is supposed to be a Catholic Dating Stite (not the Adams Family Dating Experience), so depict a picture that relates to Catholic courtship in the present time.

    Try asking some of the young men and women at your chapel and get their opinion on the pictures you used, and you might find some similar "bitter" responses and you got here in CathInfo. At least do not use AI imaging, use actual people. I am sure you can get volunteers at a parish event.

    2.) These images you used are "out of touch" and they depict Catholicism as "dull". You say you want to "show people that it's not necessarily the case." yet the images you use depicts that which you are trying to avoid.
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    Offline Xenophon

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #17 on: March 04, 2024, 01:31:27 PM »
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    • Quote from: Ladislaus on March 04, 2024, 12:23:40 PM
    Nobody's "bitter".  Those pictures just make the couple look very unhappy and even morose, and are probably not going to appeal to youth today.  Just an observation people are making, having nothing to do with "bitterness".
    Yes because 60 year old's are the ones that would know best about what is appealing to the youth. That is the essential problem with the boomer mentality. But I get it, wrong site to post this on. 
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    Offline Ladislaus

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #18 on: March 04, 2024, 01:51:22 PM »
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    • Quote from: Xenophon on March 04, 2024, 01:31:27 PM
    Yes because 60 year old's are the ones that would know best about what is appealing to the youth. That is the essential problem with the boomer mentality. But I get it, wrong site to post this on.

    It's unappealing to me, and I have young adult children, and I can sure you they're unappealing to everyone.  But just keep plodding away ... arrogantly rejecting any critiques of your endeavor.  People who don't agree 100% with everything you're doing are "bitter" or outdated "boomers".  Matthew similarly characterized the pictures as having the appearance of "cosplay".

    None of the people in your pictures even look remotely happy, not a single smile to be found.  But yeah that's just a crusty and grumpy old "60-year-old" (I'm 55 ... nor am I a boomer) speaking, thinking that they look too grumpy and crusty, but the youth are all about being grumpy and are not seeking happiness in marriage but are seeking the Amish lifestyle.

    This below is how happy all the "youth" imagine they'll be on their wedding days, looking forward to 50 years of drugery.
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    Offline Ladislaus

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #19 on: March 04, 2024, 01:51:45 PM »
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    • Quote from: Matthew on March 03, 2024, 11:05:58 PM
    Talk about making it look like Trads are out of date.

    "Trad? Want to get married? I hope you like cosplaying that it's the Wild West!"
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    Offline St Giles

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #20 on: March 04, 2024, 02:00:34 PM »
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    • Yeah, the pictures are creepy and off putting, and I'm much younger than Lad.

    I'm also not a fan of the modern multi layer wide layout scroll a lot type website, even though it's the trend for the past 5 or so years. Maybe I am old, but whatever happened to the logical and dense organization of classic desktop websites?
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    Offline Everlast22

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #21 on: March 04, 2024, 02:07:31 PM »
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    • I think a lot of what's wrong with the young trad community is simply a lack of maturity in regards to the real world and dealing with it. Let's be real, 85 percent of the trad community young people were/are sheltered. Maybe not on purpose, but a lot of them are simply adult children. I'm not sure how anyone can disagree with the statement I just gave. I know so many young trad men over 18 working 10 hours a week at most, living at home, just squatting in their parents house. How in the world is this acceptable? 

    With that being said, I would make it mandatory that anyone with intention to date on your site agree that the purpose of the site is to find a spouse and get married.. Which eventually comes with sacrifice and cultivation of virtue. Us faithful don't have a say in this. It's going to be very difficult, and crosses will need to be carried.

    I've noticed a huge difference of maturity between converts/NO trads and cradle "trads", too. This pretty much comes from sheltering and lack of exposure to the wicked world. The world is wicked, however, we need to be IN the world, not OF the world. Again, at some point your sheltered trad adult child needs to get out there and suffer.
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    Offline Ladislaus

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #22 on: March 04, 2024, 02:48:14 PM »
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    • Quote from: Everlast22 on March 04, 2024, 02:07:31 PM
    I think a lot of what's wrong with the young trad community is simply a lack of maturity in regards to the real world and dealing with it. Let's be real, 85 percent of the trad community young people were/are sheltered. Maybe not on purpose, but a lot of them are simply adult children. I'm not sure how anyone can disagree with the statement I just gave. I know so many young trad men over 18 working 10 hours a week at most, living at home, just squatting in their parents house. How in the world is this acceptable?

    With that being said, I would make it mandatory that anyone with intention to date on your site agree that the purpose of the site is to find a spouse and get married.. Which eventually comes with sacrifice and cultivation of virtue. Us faithful don't have a say in this. It's going to be very difficult, and crosses will need to be carried.

    I've noticed a huge difference of maturity between converts/NO trads and cradle "trads", too. This pretty much comes from sheltering and lack of exposure to the wicked world. The world is wicked, however, we need to be IN the world, not OF the world. Again, at some point your sheltered trad adult child needs to get out there and suffer.

    You're not wrong.  There's a balance to be had between sheltering the children from the evils of the world, and knowing enough about the world (and how it works, with all its evil) to be able to succeed in it.  God only knows what the right balance is, and it may be different for each child with a different temperament.  I've known some kids who were so sheltered that they resented it and then bolted (not only from the house but from the faith, not just the Traditional Catholic faith, but from the Catholic faith) the minute they turned 18.  I know my older ones are still living at home, but they work full time jobs (making decent money) and are saving it so they'll be in a position to just buy a house outright when the time comes for them to get married.
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    Offline Gray2023

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #23 on: March 04, 2024, 02:50:40 PM »
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    • Quote from: Xenophon on March 04, 2024, 01:31:27 PM
    Yes because 60 year old's are the ones that would know best about what is appealing to the youth. That is the essential problem with the boomer mentality. But I get it, wrong site to post this on.
    This is what is wrong with the younger generations, no respect for older people who have "been there, done that".  Xenophon, if you cannot take constructive criticism, then you need to grow up.  The site is too dreary to most people and paints marriage as a sad state of affairs.  I would have been more charitable, if you hadn't responded so defensively to constructive criticism.  May God bless you and keep you.

    I think there is a need for a site like this, but please paint marriage more joyously. I am not a boomer, I am 49.
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    Offline Everlast22

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #24 on: March 04, 2024, 03:06:02 PM »
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    • Quote from: Ladislaus on March 04, 2024, 02:48:14 PM
    You're not wrong.  There's a balance to be had between sheltering the children from the evils of the world, and knowing enough about the world (and how it works, with all its evil) to be able to succeed in it.  God only knows what the right balance is, and it may be different for each child with a different temperament.  I've known some kids who were so sheltered that they resented it and then bolted (not only from the house but from the faith, not just the Traditional Catholic faith, but from the Catholic faith) the minute they turned 18.  I know my older ones are still living at home, but they work full time jobs (making decent money) and are saving it so they'll be in a position to just buy a house outright when the time comes for them to get married.
    Yes, and as someone who has a little one on the way, that balance with our children in navigating this world keeps me up at night. I'm not sure what to expect (besides putting my trust in God) how things will be in the near future. I'm also usually more "tougher" on the guys than the gals, though. I believe the young men need to "get out there" more than the young girls do. Especially with how impressionable and conformist young women can be. It gets to them way more easily I think.
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    Offline SimpleMan

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #25 on: March 04, 2024, 03:32:19 PM »
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    • This is a great concept, but I'd do something about those pictures.  If I were in the courting market, I'd especially appreciate that "one person at a time" thing.  I've found that a certain kind of woman "gets a charge" out of having several men interested in her at the same time.  A certain kind of man might get similar ego-stroking out of that, but it seems to be more of a female thing --- "all of these guys are crazy about me, oooh, that feels so good!".

    In addition to being grave and morose, and not meshing with the "shiny happy people" theme that folks usually expect to see on "match" websites, IMO they even come across as kind of campy, as though they are meant to be some kind of joke that doesn't know it's a joke (or professes not to know).  That kind of edgy, ironic approach could have its place, but I don't think a website such as this one is that place.

    Even similar pictures from the opening credits of Cheers, which this vaguely reminds me of, show some of the people smiling or at least appearing to be happy (as with the bartender holding up the newspaper announcing the end of Prohibition).
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    Offline Ladislaus

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #26 on: March 04, 2024, 03:50:00 PM »
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    • Quote from: Everlast22 on March 04, 2024, 03:06:02 PM
    ... as someone who has a little one on the way ...

    Congratulations.  You've really moving fast.  Before you know it, the little one will be a teenager.
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    Offline SimpleMan

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #27 on: March 04, 2024, 04:14:50 PM »
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    • Quote from: Ladislaus on March 04, 2024, 03:50:00 PM
    Congratulations.  You've really moving fast.  Before you know it, the little one will be a teenager.
    Truer words were never spoken.

    My "little one" will be 17 in a few days.  Seems like yesterday that he was toddling around the house, and we had to make him a "perimeter" to run around in, so that he wouldn't wander all over the house and do damage to things (or himself).
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    Offline Univocity

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #28 on: March 04, 2024, 05:15:46 PM »
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    • I commented about the distasteful images.  I am 32.  I wonder how old OP is.  None of my traditional Catholic friends would find this AI "art" appealing either.  It's just... weird.  Out of place.  Jarring.  Cringe.

    If a person was going on this site to find a spouse, a natural assumption would be that the members of the site like the aesthetic... I certainly would be put off by a woman who liked that kind of imagery.  Look, the site is a good idea.  But literally not one person agrees with you that this style is a good match.  Try again.
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    Offline AnthonyPadua

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    Re: Traditional Catholic Dating site!
    « Reply #29 on: March 04, 2024, 05:27:59 PM »
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    • Are they A.I images? Gives me that uncanny valley feeling. Maybe images of the Holy Family would be better, they are they ideal standard for any Catholic family.

    OP please don't take the feed back too harshly.
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