Author Topic: Today is my 10th birthday - I re-entered the world 10 years ago (Read 660 times)

Matthew · « **on:** December 08, 2013, 04:14:59 PM »

Almost to the hour, it was 10 years ago today that I found myself back home from the Seminary, back in the world, a complete fish out of water.

Imagine being dead for 3 1/2 years and then being brought back to life.

You breathe again, yes, but what about the rest of your worldly life? Your stuff? Your house? Your car? Your money? Your resume? Your career? All gone. You have to start over like a person that was just born.

Like a terrorist having snuck across the border, you have little to prove you were here before today.

It wasn't fun. But I must say that God watches out for those who are devoted to His mother. I can't complain about the past 10 years. By His grace and through Mary's intercession, many good people helped me get back on my feet.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee.

Marlelar · « **Reply #1 on:** December 08, 2013, 09:20:14 PM »

Being in the seminary is like being dead? You couldn't breathe???

Didn't you voluntarily give up your home, your car, your career to enter?

It's sounds more like coming back from prison than from seminary. Is the SSPX seminary really so bad?

Marsha

Sigismund · « **Reply #2 on:** December 08, 2013, 09:57:25 PM »

Quote from: Marlelar

Being in the seminary is like being dead? You couldn't breathe???

Didn't you voluntarily give up your home, your car, your career to enter?

It's sounds more like coming back from prison than from seminary. Is the SSPX seminary really so bad?

Marsha

I had the exact same thoughts.

Matthew · « **Reply #3 on:** December 08, 2013, 09:58:11 PM »

Quote from: Marlelar

Being in the seminary is like being dead? You couldn't breathe???

Didn't you voluntarily give up your home, your car, your career to enter?

It's sounds more like coming back from prison than from seminary. Is the SSPX seminary really so bad?

Marsha

Don't misunderstand.

First of all, it was *after* I left the seminary that I was a fish out of water (couldn't breathe).

The happiest 3 1/2 years of my life were the years spent in the Seminary, dead to the world. I loved wearing the Cassock because of what it represented.

I was very fervent and choleric about entering the Seminary. That much was my choice and my doing. I didn't want any distractions, so I sold my car, etc. I didn't want to have to worry about it, and I was "certain" I had a vocation.

It's exactly like returning from prison, though. You have to re-integrate yourself into the world after being a member of an institution (living in a large dorm, community of other men, etc.) for a number of years. It takes re-adjustment.

Anyone who has experienced this can relate.

The greater the # of years, the greater the shock as you try to re-adjust.

Thorn · « **Reply #4 on:** December 08, 2013, 09:58:15 PM »

That's what I thought too!!! You beat me to it.
I don't get it. Why would it take over 3 years before leaving?
Were you forced into it somehow?

Mabel · « **Reply #5 on:** December 08, 2013, 10:48:17 PM »

I know someone with a similar experience who is now happily married with a family, he probably could have written this.

Matthew · « **Reply #6 on:** December 08, 2013, 10:49:06 PM »

Quote from: Thorn

That's what I thought too!!! You beat me to it.
I don't get it. Why would it take over 3 years before leaving?
Were you forced into it somehow?

Exactly.

Anyone who isn't fit for the studies, discipline, religious lifestyle, chastity, etc. normally leaves during their first year.

Seminarians DO leave in the later years, for various reasons.

In my case, it wasn't the studies, the Rule/discipline or any "internal forum" reason (morality, purity, etc.)

Let's put it this way:

July 2003: Bishop Williamson sent to Argentina
September 2003: Fr. Le Roux takes over as seminary rector
Late November 2003: Matthew advised that he doesn't have a vocation -- no reason given.

I should add that I was a big fan of +W back then, and it showed. I was very open and honest -- possibly too much so, for certain types to take advantage of. I was very fervently against the World and a strong follower of +W and maybe "they" knew it. I wouldn't make a good phlegmatic Francophile "yes man", and perhaps they knew that too.

Thorn · « **Reply #7 on:** December 09, 2013, 12:41:43 AM »

Sorry - I'm going to have to learn how to quote people to avoid misunderstanding.
First off, I was 'talking' to Marsha when I said, " That's what I thought too."

Then I asked if you, Matthew, was forced into it. I meant forced into the seminary & not forced into leaving.

I now get it tho & can now relate - all too well.

StCeciliasGirl · « **Reply #8 on:** December 09, 2013, 01:08:04 AM »

Just think what a blessing, though. It must have been hard at the time, but you can see God's Providence now! ESPECIALLY now! Deo Gratias!

That thing that happened over a year ago now, that still bothers me. More than I should let it. (We shouldn't be surprised.) But I do feel for those caught up in it now, with vows on their heads, to remain in what looks strangely like a handbasket, headed south. I wouldn't know WHAT to do.

Indeed, you were blessed. Richly.