Author Topic: The Single Life (Read 2800 times)

Hobbledehoy · « **Reply #5 on:** March 22, 2011, 10:14:09 PM »

Quote from: Oremus

I'm sharing my experience with you because I don't know which of your categories I would fit into and to point out that I don't think it's that simple to categorize these things.

Thank you for sharing your experiences. I did not mean to give the impression that the three queries were categories I have arbitrarily devised. These are merely epitomes of three points of view that I have constantly encountered in my discussions with others upon this topic. I wish to know if others have different points of view on this matter or have different impressions of how this question is treated by other Catholics. I do not believe most people can be compartmentalized as conveniently as we would like, but unfortunately most people behave as if this can be done.

Quote from: Oremus

1. It sounds like you're suggesting that marriage or religious life are the only real choices someone has, and being single is for those that aren't cut out for marriage or religious. I would argue and suggest that being single is as strong as the other two.

What I wrote was my impression of how most Catholics have viewed the subject of vocations. They are not necessarily my own opinions. Actually, I agree with you on this point, but I did not state my personal views at first because I wanted a discussion that was not narrowed by reactions to my points of view.

Quote from: Oremus

3. Definitely don't think it's a because of a deficiency or anything like that, but I'm biased .

Hey, I'm as biased as you

Hobbledehoy · « **Reply #6 on:** March 22, 2011, 10:24:45 PM »

Quote from: Jehanne

Okay, you are a man, so you can be single for a while. Now, if you are a woman, the older you get, the more unlikely it is that you are going to find a mate. So, that's something to consider. As for the religious life, I think that a lot of people go into it with a lot of idealism, and then when they get older, maybe they have regrets due to loss of faith, secularism, modernism within the Church, etc., perhaps even become bitter. Something to at least be aware of.

These things are very true. The book by Rev. Father Dominic Unger on the topic, The Mystery of Love for Single People, focuses in some chapters on how women can find the single life particularly difficult and has some advice for them. This Franciscan author posits that the single life is indeed a vocation, but it is contingent on the preservation of virginity (or penitent chastity).

The Religious life is often idealized as the "land that floweth with milk and honey" (Exod. ch. iii., 8), and it is truly so, but for those who are trained in the Royal Way of the Cross, as St. Louis Marie called it. A very great detachment from self and all other created things is necessary for Religious perfection. But the situation of our present age sometimes makes the stability that is indispensable for the Religious life a luxury that can often be ephemeral (as we have seen in the case of Christ the King Abbey).

Exilenomore · « **Reply #7 on:** March 23, 2011, 06:12:02 AM »

I have a strong disinclination to marry, but my health might not be strong enough to enter religious life, so I will probably embrace the single state. I believe it was Pope Pius XI (?) who lauded individual men and women living in the world, who have made a private vow of celibacy in order to serve God more freely. I have not yet made such a private vow but I am seriously considering it.

Hobbledehoy · « **Reply #8 on:** March 24, 2011, 11:57:10 PM »

Quote from: Exilenomore

I believe it was Pope Pius XI (?) who lauded individual men and women living in the world, who have made a private vow of celibacy in order to serve God more freely.

Pope Pius XII in his Encyclical Letter Sacra virginitas (Acta Apostolicae Sedis, vol. xlvi., pp. 161-191; 25 March 1954) taught that perfect chastity "also flourishes among many who are lay people in the full sense: men and women who are not constituted in a public state of perfection and yet by a private promise or vow completely abstain from marriage and sɛҳuąƖ pleasures, in order to serve their neighbor more freely and be united with God more easily and closely," etiam apud non paucos floret, qui ad laicorum ordinem omnino pertinent; viri enim et mulieres habentur, qui in statu publico perfectionis non constituuntur, et tamen a matrimonio delectationibusque carnis ex proposito vel voto privato se omnino abstinent, ut liberius proximis inserviant et ut facilius arctiusque cuм Deo animum coniungant suum [translation of the Latin text is by the Vatican Polyglot Press].

The resolution to practice chastity according to one's state is the duty of all Catholic. The private vow of chastity of which the Pope speaks ought not to be taken by those committed to the single life without the counsel and tutelage of a canonically fit and trained Father Confessor.

Rev. Father Dominic Unger in his book The Mystery of Love for Single People discusses the single life in light of the Holy Father's Encyclical Letter. The book was originally published by the Franciscan Herald Press in 1958 and has been reprinted by TAN Publications.

stevusmagnus · « **Reply #9 on:** March 25, 2011, 08:50:16 PM »

There is debate as to whether the single state is a vocation or not. A lot of Traditional priests think it is. Just keep close to God and He'll work it out for you.