Author Topic: St Josephs Night for wedding night? (Read 2125 times)

PartyIsOver221 · « **on:** June 06, 2010, 01:56:02 PM »

I have a question that I've searching for an answer for awhile and have no other recourse but to ask on these forums, which should have been my first course of action.

Has anyone ever heard of an old custom of dedicating the first wedding night to St Joseph by abstaining from sɛҳuąƖ relations ? The only place I saw this was in the fisheaters (yeah I know..its fisheaters) site on Holy Matrimony. No internet searches have pulled up any more info on it, but I would like the traditional Catholic view on this or anyones opinion out there.

I understand that one the marriage is consummated it is completed, but even before then it is still valid. Thanks in advance for any insight.

MaterDominici · « **Reply #1 on:** June 06, 2010, 06:05:25 PM »

Quote from: Basil

Well, even humanly speaking married couples are often very nervous, especially if they kept themselves chaste until marriage. After a long wedding day, possibly with little sleep the night before, sleep might be a better idea. When the body is stressed, fasting, or tired there are certain things the body stops caring about. There's always the next night. And anyone who thinks the wedding night is this wonderful experience, with violins playing, cherubs hovering over your bed, where everything goes perfectly, and both husband & wife walk away thinking "how can we ever top this wonderful experience" has never been married! lol

If you haven't read Tobias, you should do so.

http://drbo.org/book/17.htm

Chapter 8 discusses their wedding night, but the whole book is an easy, interesting read.

PartyIsOver221 · « **Reply #2 on:** June 06, 2010, 07:55:55 PM »

Quote from: Basil

Well, even humanly speaking married couples are often very nervous, especially if they kept themselves chaste until marriage. After a long wedding day, possibly with little sleep the night before, sleep might be a better idea. When the body is stressed, fasting, or tired there are certain things the body stops caring about. There's always the next night. And anyone who thinks the wedding night is this wonderful experience, with violins playing, cherubs hovering over your bed, where everything goes perfectly, and both husband & wife walk away thinking "how can we ever top this wonderful experience" has never been married! lol

Awesome, basil and Mater.. I have read Tobias and yeah it was powerful and did show where the custom originated from. I was just wondering if anyone actually does this anywhere and if its more of a traditional thing to do. Or is it better to consummated as soon as possible..

ANother question... when is the actual grace bestowed on the couple? After consummation (aka sɛҳuąƖ relations) or at the wedding ceremony/prayers.

Catholic Samurai · « **Reply #3 on:** June 12, 2010, 03:18:32 PM »

I cant say that I've ever heard of offering an abstinence period to St.Joseph, but I do recall one of the Fathers of Church (I dont remember which one) recommending an abstinence period of at least one month.

I've always had the impression that an abstinence after the marriage was always the right thing to do, but the idea of offering it to St.Joseph never occurred to me.