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Author Topic: Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?  (Read 1935 times)

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Offline Peter15and1

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Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
« on: October 23, 2015, 08:02:57 AM »
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  • From time to time, I read other traditional Catholic online fora.  Recently, I was reading a thread on another website that shocked me somewhat.  The thread was discussing the case of women who become pregnant outside of wedlock.  As the thread went on, some people began taking the position that in all cases of single parents--whether it be out-of-wedlock pregnancies, a innocent spouse in a divorce, and even widows--society and the Church should try and force the adoption of the child, so that it has both a mother and a father.

    To me, this seems rather heartless, and I have a hard time believing that this a Church teaching.  I know that having both a mother and father is the ideal situation, but forcing a widow to give her child up for adoption because her husband died just seem cruel.


    Offline JezusDeKoning

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #1 on: October 23, 2015, 08:37:58 AM »
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  • Single parenting does not immediately discredit someone from being able to solidly raise a kid. That and in all of those situations, the situation could be resolved so that there would be multiple forces at play.
    Remember O most gracious Virgin Mary...


    Offline Patrick JK Gray

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #2 on: October 23, 2015, 08:59:42 AM »
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  • Quote from: Peter15and1
    From time to time, I read other traditional Catholic online fora.  Recently, I was reading a thread on another website that shocked me somewhat.  The thread was discussing the case of women who become pregnant outside of wedlock.  As the thread went on, some people began taking the position that in all cases of single parents--whether it be out-of-wedlock pregnancies, a innocent spouse in a divorce, and even widows--society and the Church should try and force the adoption of the child, so that it has both a mother and a father.

    To me, this seems rather heartless, and I have a hard time believing that this a Church teaching.  I know that having both a mother and father is the ideal situation, but forcing a widow to give her child up for adoption because her husband died just seem cruel.


    I agree with illegitimate children (such was always the policy of the Church with regard to the Magdalenes or penitents in the much-slandered institutions for their repentance), but the other two seem unnecessary. There is always the hope than the sinful party will reconcile.
    Let nothing fret you
    Nothing upset you
    Everything falters
    God never alters
    Patience withal
    Will obtain all.
    Who to God will cling
    Can lack for no thing.
    God alone suffices!


    Sacred Heart of Jesus, I put in you all the trust I can lay my h

    Offline Patrick JK Gray

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #3 on: October 23, 2015, 09:15:14 AM »
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  • Quote from: Patrick JK Gray
    Quote from: Peter15and1
    From time to time, I read other traditional Catholic online fora.  Recently, I was reading a thread on another website that shocked me somewhat.  The thread was discussing the case of women who become pregnant outside of wedlock.  As the thread went on, some people began taking the position that in all cases of single parents--whether it be out-of-wedlock pregnancies, a innocent spouse in a divorce, and even widows--society and the Church should try and force the adoption of the child, so that it has both a mother and a father.

    To me, this seems rather heartless, and I have a hard time believing that this a Church teaching.  I know that having both a mother and father is the ideal situation, but forcing a widow to give her child up for adoption because her husband died just seem cruel.


    I agree with illegitimate children (such was always the policy of the Church with regard to the Magdalenes or penitents in the much-slandered institutions for their repentance), but the other two seem unnecessary. There is always the hope than the sinful party will reconcile.


    I ought to add that these holy institutions are viciously attacked for no other reason than to excuse the sins for which the penitents were committed for. If, for instance, the notorious Miss Philomena Lee says that' We were so browbeaten, it was such a sin. It was an awful thing to have a baby out of wedlock' it is because it is abominable and deserves a penitential life which will bring the blessings of God on the penitent.

    Someone who can commit commit fornication is quite unfit to bring up a child.
    Let nothing fret you
    Nothing upset you
    Everything falters
    God never alters
    Patience withal
    Will obtain all.
    Who to God will cling
    Can lack for no thing.
    God alone suffices!


    Sacred Heart of Jesus, I put in you all the trust I can lay my h

    Offline Ava

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #4 on: October 23, 2015, 09:35:46 AM »
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  • I participated in that discussion.  I find the idea that it's a sin not to give the child up for adoption to be completely unfounded in Catholic teaching.  Not to mention that the mother may not even have a choice in many scenarios.  

    If a traditional Catholic girl were to end up with child, out of wedlock, I would only suggest  adoption if there was a traditional catholic couple available.  Placing through an organization like Catholic Charities is a guarantee of nothing.


    Offline Patrick JK Gray

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #5 on: October 23, 2015, 09:48:38 AM »
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  • A very sensible modification in these dreadful times providing the mother is penitent.
    Let nothing fret you
    Nothing upset you
    Everything falters
    God never alters
    Patience withal
    Will obtain all.
    Who to God will cling
    Can lack for no thing.
    God alone suffices!


    Sacred Heart of Jesus, I put in you all the trust I can lay my h

    Offline ihsv

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #6 on: October 23, 2015, 10:27:08 AM »
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  • If a woman has a child out of wedlock, it becomes her responsibility and duty to raise, educate, and take care of the child.  Did she go about things the wrong way?  Did she sin?   Yes.  However, once a sin is confessed, it is no longer an issue.  What remains now is for the mother to do what is best and necessary to raise her child as a good Catholic.  That duty, obligation and right is hers, and hers alone.  No one can legitimately demand that she put the child up for adoption.
    Confiteor unum baptisma in remissionem peccatorum. - Nicene Creed

    Offline Matthew

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #7 on: October 23, 2015, 10:28:10 AM »
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  • It's the Natural Law that a mother has a right to her own child. We're talking basic God-given human rights that can't be violated under any circuмstances.

    Why not force a man to marry her instead? If we're going to get all pushy, I mean. That way at least the natural law won't be violated.

    Needless to say, whoever way saying that on those not-so-trad forums, is soaking up a bit too much of the spirit of the World (which is becoming more and more of a nightmare dystopia, by the way)

    I've heard of few things more ridiculous than this idea: a woman's husband dies. So take the child(ren) away because "they deserve 2 parents". Oh yeah, that will really help her in her grief. Why not just execute the widow and complete the trifecta?

    (Obviously I don't really think these things should be done -- I'm demonstrating how absurd this line of thinking is)

    This idea is like the product of a bizarre fornication between Communism (who believes that children firstly belong to the state, that it takes a village to raise a child, etc.) and Catholicism.
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    Offline ihsv

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #8 on: October 23, 2015, 10:32:45 AM »
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  • This wretched idea of stealing children from "unworthys" smells like it has its basis in puritanism.
    Confiteor unum baptisma in remissionem peccatorum. - Nicene Creed

    Offline Matthew

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #9 on: October 23, 2015, 10:38:43 AM »
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  • Now in the case of an out-of-wedlock pregnancy, a woman was often convinced to RELINQUISH her RIGHT over the child, giving it up for adoption, which was praiseworthy as it was a very selfless path, thinking of the good of the child who wasn't yet born over the personal good of the mother (having a cute baby around).

    Whoever tries to bring divorcees and widows into this is just confused in the head. Are people this unable to think anymore?

    The modern world glorifies the single mother, suggesting that "famlies come in all shapes and sizes: single mother, single father, two moms, two dads..." and it further insists that you can't claim one is better than the other. That would be narrow-minded judging.

    Obviously we can't agree with that. We know that single-parent households are fundamentally defective, and will have consequences for the children.

    Don't confuse yourself: yes, a Magdalene can sincerely confess her sin in the confessional and "God always forgives". Mankind might give her a chance ("Man sometimes forgives") But then there's nature, who never forgives. Nature will exact a high price for her "slip up" -- a child without a father has all kinds of psychological damage, which will affect his/her future marriage and everything. Girls of single parents tend to marry (or at least procreate) very young, which basically perpetuates the pattern in many cases. Girls need a daddy, or they have this male/daddy void in their hearts, and they find a man as soon as they can when they're older.

    Just don't forget that wise saying: God always forgives, man sometimes forgives, nature never forgives.
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    Offline Ava

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #10 on: October 23, 2015, 10:45:49 AM »
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  • One of the individuals who insisted adoption was the only moral solution also suggested that if a parent dies, infant children  (who supposedly aren't attached yet) should be given up by the living spouse to a 2 parent family.  I find that absurd.  I'm glad to see that others think so as well.


    Offline clare

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #11 on: October 23, 2015, 10:57:01 AM »
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  • Quote from: Patrick JK Gray
    Someone who can commit commit fornication is quite unfit to bring up a child.

    St Augustine managed it, and also managed to become a bishop!

    Offline Jaynek

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #12 on: October 23, 2015, 11:49:59 AM »
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  • Quote from: Patrick JK Gray
    Someone who can commit commit fornication is quite unfit to bring up a child.


    I committed fornication before I became Catholic.  I later became Catholic, got married, and had 7 children.  Was I unfit to bring up those children?

    Offline TheRealMcCoy

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #13 on: October 23, 2015, 12:29:46 PM »
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  • Pope Alexander VI not only raised his natural children born of fornication he begat many spiritual children as Pontiff.

    Offline TheRealMcCoy

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    Single Parent - Mandatory Adoption?
    « Reply #14 on: October 23, 2015, 12:32:10 PM »
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  • Quote from: Ava
    One of the individuals who insisted adoption was the only moral solution also suggested that if a parent dies, infant children  (who supposedly aren't attached yet) should be given up by the living spouse to a 2 parent family.  I find that absurd.  I'm glad to see that others think so as well.


    This is the result of the abortion mentality.