Author Topic: Refinement of character (Read 1469 times)

soulguard · « **on:** December 11, 2013, 08:30:50 AM »

I have noticed that some trad Catholics, a good number of them, have highly refined characters and sensibilities. They exude discipline of mind, and from their words proceeds complex wisdom which flows freely and easily.

What is the secret to becoming so refined?

I ask this because such a state is obviously useful for the purposes of converting others. It speaks with the authority of one who is successful in the secular world, and people will respect an articulate orthodox opinion if it is spoken in the same manner as an expert in some secular thing speaks of his trade.

Or is this not necessary? Is there a place for the common accent, the harsh manner of speaking, and the crude and uneducated in this faith? To they help to save a different audience?

Thoughts please.
:king: :ape: :farmer:

Sigismund · « **Reply #1 on:** December 11, 2013, 08:56:23 PM »

Read good literature and associate with the people whose qualities you admire.

Graham · « **Reply #2 on:** December 11, 2013, 10:08:21 PM »

Quote from: Sigismund

Read good literature and associate with the people whose qualities you admire.

Yes, especially the people you admire part. Reading a good book is, in a way, like conversing with someone you admire, though it generally cannot have the integral impact of in-the-flesh teachers and friends with noble qualities.

Cantarella · « **Reply #3 on:** December 11, 2013, 10:24:13 PM »

Quote from: Sigismund

Read good literature and associate with the people whose qualities you admire.

That.

Mabel · « **Reply #4 on:** December 11, 2013, 10:43:52 PM »

All of the above. I'd also say knowing your place in the world and being prudent in social situations. Learning how to size up the good or harm an action may cause is key.

The writings of St. Francis de Sales are great in many aspects for learning how to be a refined Catholic, as you call it.

jen51 · « **Reply #5 on:** December 11, 2013, 10:59:50 PM »

Thanks for the good advice, everyone.

I would also add offering yourself to God every morning, begging him to make of you what he wills. Then entrust yourself to him, acknowledging that every good development in your character was given to you by God, and not acquired by your own doing. Remain humble.

Cuthbert · « **Reply #6 on:** December 11, 2013, 11:21:56 PM »

Sigismund is spot on, it also wouldn't hurt to learn a few languages, there are even today many superb Catholic books that have never been translated into English, those of Gougenot des Mousseaux spring to mind. They've been out of print for years but can be found on archive.org & sometimes google books, I've printed several from these sites. French, German & Latin would be good to start with, there are quite a few old grammars & dictionaries that can be had for free from the aforementioned sites as well.

shin · « **Reply #7 on:** December 11, 2013, 11:25:46 PM »

'I had become by this time fond of good books, and that gave me life. I read the Epistles of St. Jerome, which filled me with so much courage. . .'

St. Teresa of Jesus

'"In the company of the innocent, you will be innocent; in the company of the elect, you will be elect; and in a crooked man's company you will go wrong." [Ps. 18:26,27]

Let us, then, follow the innocent and the upright. They, it is, who are God's elect.'

Pope St. Clement I of Rome

Anthony Benedict · « **Reply #8 on:** December 11, 2013, 11:29:23 PM »

I can only add, soulguard, inasmuch as the advice given on this thread is absolute gold, that you might want to make a list of the folks whose posts precede this one and pay especial attention to their posts in the future.

Many of them are the very reason I visit here myself.

SoldierOfChrist · « **Reply #9 on:** December 11, 2013, 11:45:45 PM »

All of the above and understand that there is a learning curve. We are all a little bit rough around the edges before we find the One True Faith. Allow God to refine you over time, through prayer, study, and penance.

Sigismund · « **Reply #10 on:** December 12, 2013, 05:30:49 PM »

Quote from: Cuthbert

Sigismund is spot on, it also wouldn't hurt to learn a few languages, there are even today many superb Catholic books that have never been translated into English, those of Gougenot des Mousseaux spring to mind. They've been out of print for years but can be found on archive.org & sometimes google books, I've printed several from these sites. French, German & Latin would be good to start with, there are quite a few old grammars & dictionaries that can be had for free from the aforementioned sites as well.

That is excellent advice. I am sadly pretty much monolingual, and that is a serious hole in my education.

Cuthbert · « **Reply #11 on:** December 13, 2013, 07:33:07 PM »

Thank you for the kind words Sigismund, I would like to encourage you to learn those languages which most interest you, Dr. Johnson learned Dutch in his 60's (or perhaps 70's can't quite remember). If God wills that I live so long as that I hope that I might follow his example in that respect.

Graham · « **Reply #12 on:** December 14, 2013, 09:21:28 PM »

Quote from: Sigismund

Quote from: Cuthbert
Sigismund is spot on, it also wouldn't hurt to learn a few languages, there are even today many superb Catholic books that have never been translated into English, those of Gougenot des Mousseaux spring to mind. They've been out of print for years but can be found on archive.org & sometimes google books, I've printed several from these sites. French, German & Latin would be good to start with, there are quite a few old grammars & dictionaries that can be had for free from the aforementioned sites as well.

That is excellent advice. I am sadly pretty much monolingual, and that is a serious hole in my education.

I would like to add that knowing a musical instrument was in other times considered an essential gentlemanly skill.

bowler · « **Reply #13 on:** December 14, 2013, 09:47:59 PM »

Quote from: soulguard

I have noticed that some trad Catholics, a good number of them, have highly refined characters and sensibilities. They exude discipline of mind, and from their words proceeds complex wisdom which flows freely and easily.

What is the secret to becoming so refined?

I ask this because such a state is obviously useful for the purposes of converting others. It speaks with the authority of one who is successful in the secular world, and people will respect an articulate orthodox opinion if it is spoken in the same manner as an expert in some secular thing speaks of his trade.

Or is this not necessary? Is there a place for the common accent, the harsh manner of speaking, and the crude and uneducated in this faith? To they help to save a different audience?

Thoughts please.
:king: :ape: :farmer:

Babe Ruth hit the most homeruns of any player (till modern times), every baseball fan knows that. However, who knows who had the record for striking out the most times? Few fans know that one.

It was Babe Ruth.

If you don't swing, you'll never strikeout, however, you'll never hit any homeruns.

The most successful people in all endeavors are the ones that made the most mistakes AND learned from them! Every mistake is a lesson. Don't be afraid of looking like a fool, and being wrong. Learn from as many mistakes as you can and you'll do better than 90% of all the people out there.

James Bond's only exist in movies. We all make mistakes, it is the one that learns and grows from his mistakes that will one day be admired by others. How does one become like that person?