Author Topic: Parenting direction  (Read 857 times)

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Offline CathMomof7

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Parenting direction
« on: January 17, 2012, 09:56:20 AM »
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  • I could really use some direction.  

    Our oldest son is away at college.  Academically he is doing well.  

    We have many issues with his attendance and some things we have worked out.  When he can, he attends Mass at Queen of Angels Convent in Wooster, OH.  This alone has given us a tremendous amount of peace about his spiritual condition.  Everyone Sunday, I call him to remind him to go to Mass.  We also send him money to make sure he has gas to drive the 30 miles.

    Now he has a girlfriend.  The young girl is NO Catholic.  Her parents have been divorced since she was 5 or 6.  Her mother has never "remarried."  She is an education major at this college where our son attends.

    The young girl has one sister who has a child out of wedlock.  

    As far as my husband knows (he had a long talk with our son) they are not engaging in intimate physical contact.  They do spend a lot of time together and I believe our son likes her very much.

    In any case, he is bringing her to meet our family the first weekend in February.

    Both of them are in their second year of college and quickly approaching age 20.

    When they come, we are insisting that they go to Mass with us before they go back to school.  I do not know if he has taken her to Mass in Wooster.

    I believe this is a serious relationship.  Our oldest is not the kind to just "date."  

    I have many concerns.  While I would prefer that our son choose a young woman from our chapel or his, this is the young girl he has chosen.  

    I am at a total loss on how to handle this.  As his mother, I  don'twant to alienate him but I also don't want him to have a rotten future.

    Any thoughts??

    Offline s2srea

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    « Reply #1 on: January 17, 2012, 10:06:44 AM »
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  • CathMom-

    Perhaps you could wait to meet this young lady, since she will be visiting very soon. I'm not sure if you've met her, or had any sort of real communication with her yet, but it doesn't sound like it. Sometimes we fear what we do not know, right? It may be that she's a perfectly good young woman, who, God-willing, will get good spiritual direction from your son. It may be that our Good Lord placed your son in her life, to bring her to Truth.

    I would say, wait to meet her, and, while being cautious, have a good attitude and be positive about her when you meet her.  :smirk:


    Offline Paige

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    « Reply #2 on: January 17, 2012, 05:33:15 PM »
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  • Quote from: s2srea
    It may be that our Good Lord placed your son in her life, to bring her to Truth.

    I would say, wait to meet her, and, while being cautious, have a good attitude and be positive about her when you meet her.  :smirk:

    I agree!  Though this girl may not have come from an ideal background she may be ready for the Truth.  If this is the case, how wonderful for your son and family to guide her.  It may be everything that the two of them need. Prayers for you, your son and the young lady.

    Offline Sigismund

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    « Reply #3 on: January 17, 2012, 06:51:06 PM »
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  • I agree as well.  Not that this is an election.
    Stir up within Thy Church, we beseech Thee, O Lord, the Spirit with which blessed Josaphat, Thy Martyr and Bishop, was filled, when he laid down his life for his sheep: so that, through his intercession, we too may be moved and strengthen by the same Spir

    Offline CathMomof7

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    « Reply #4 on: January 19, 2012, 09:11:11 AM »
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  • Quote from: s2srea
    CathMom-

    Perhaps you could wait to meet this young lady, since she will be visiting very soon. I'm not sure if you've met her, or had any sort of real communication with her yet, but it doesn't sound like it. Sometimes we fear what we do not know, right? It may be that she's a perfectly good young woman, who, God-willing, will get good spiritual direction from your son. It may be that our Good Lord placed your son in her life, to bring her to Truth.

    I would say, wait to meet her, and, while being cautious, have a good attitude and be positive about her when you meet her.  :smirk:


    Thank you very much for this advice.  Yes, I am quite nervous but hopeful.  My husband and I have talked about the young girl's visit a lot.  We want to be pleasant and warm just in case this is, indeed, the young girl our son wishes to marry.  

    Thanks for calming my nerves and reminding me to just be patient and prayerful!


    Offline CathMomof7

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    « Reply #5 on: January 24, 2012, 11:27:26 PM »
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  • I wanted to add an update to this post.

    Last week I began praying in earnest to St. Joseph to guide our son in relation to this young girl.  I prayed with confidence and determined that Our Lord would indeed lead our son in the right direction if he was going to Mass regularly and seeking counsel from a confessor.

    Two nights ago, he called to tell us that he was no longer certain he was bringing his girl home for a visit.

    My husband contacted him further for a discussion and he learned that this young girl had been putting a lot of pressure on our son to "play house."  My husband was confident that our son has resisted this temptation but it is very difficult.

    Currently, he is not dating her and is taking a much harder look at who and what this young girl is.

    He remarked to me that perhaps he should get to know some of the families at the chapel he attends!

    Please keep our son, Ross, in your prayers, that he remain virtuous and free from the temptations of the flesh.

    Almost 20 can be a very difficult age, especially when one is attempting to live a Catholic life surrounded by worldly Protestants and NOrdites.

    Offline s2srea

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    « Reply #6 on: January 24, 2012, 11:52:55 PM »
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  • CathMomof7-

    It sounds as if St. Joseph has been at work in the life of your family. Be assured of my continued prayers!

    Offline sedetrad

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    « Reply #7 on: January 26, 2012, 08:24:26 AM »
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  • Whoa, great positive news! Keep the prayers going!  :dancing-banana:


    Offline Paige

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    « Reply #8 on: January 26, 2012, 11:45:22 AM »
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  • Will pray for strength for young Ross.  Though it sounds like he has a great head on his shoulders and a wonderful relationship with your husband and you.  :)  
     :pray:

     

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