Author Topic: nursing homes (Read 3772 times)

jman123 · « **on:** July 13, 2012, 11:45:44 AM »

I found this on another forum. I would like your thoughts on this.

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Today, I had to visit a relative at a nursery home. He does not want to be there, and I can't blame him. It's basically a place to have him and other seniors wait to die. I once heard a trad priest say in a sermon that since our parents took care of us when no one else would, and we were helpless, we are obligated to the same when they are old. The Fifth Commandment. I would never want my grandparents or my mother in such a situation. Needless to say, I would not want to be in one myself.

Unfortunately, we can't do much since we are only distant relatives. I simply would like some trad. Cath. thoughts on this issue.

s2srea · « **Reply #1 on:** July 13, 2012, 12:01:06 PM »

Jman,

Its disgusting how the culture today has perpetuated this idea that the elderly are somehow a burden. I've seen these types of places as well, and they are really sad. You said it well when you said they're places for people to 'wait and die'. Many of those care workers are immigrants who studied in other countries and aren't sufficiently trained as nurses. When I was a firefighter and would arrive at calls at these homes, I was appalled at the lack of basic medical understanding some of these people had; it was negligence, as far as I'm concerned.

catherineofsiena · « **Reply #2 on:** July 13, 2012, 04:06:04 PM »

I agree with both of you. It is so sad. I can't stand to walk in there, let alone work in such a place. Human life is disposable and people are selfish. Plus, there is no one at home anymore to take care of the elderly relatives or even the children.

songbird · « **Reply #3 on:** July 13, 2012, 08:40:55 PM »

I take it that you are far away. Who is medical advisor, in the family? Can a priest come by every 6 weeks to bring the sacraments? It is difficult to get information of a patient when there are so many private things that can not be told. Be sure to have Masses said for these residents. You can visit and watch and still their care is just not enough or how we would do it if we could at home. We cared for our mom for 8 months as long as God would allow. Mom was in a care facility for a year before her death. One nurse was relieved of her duties for over dosing mom, she was diabetic. The over dosing was on purpose to get an ambulance to take her to the hospital of which my husband worked in Pharmacy. Mom was over dose whenever there was a 3 day weekend, and that is how the nurse was caught. I kept a journal, but still, these residents still could get better care. To few caregivers per residents also.

Tiffany · « **Reply #4 on:** July 14, 2012, 05:44:33 AM »

Songbird I'm so sorry about your mom's experience, what an evil person.

Sometimes it's nearly impossible to care for someone at home. I've known spouses that just could not handle the physical demands of caring for someone. Sometimes people are combatitive too.

Some nursing home are terrible but there are nice ones too but these are privately funded only more affluent people go there. There are Catholic ones that have Mass in the mornings.
I know of a small plain one and the care is great. My Aunt had one out of her home for several years and she is an excellent nurse. When she was not there her friends would be there so they were always with a registered nurse.

Many are terrible though and have only the minimum of staff and some of the staff neglects the patients. If these places would lower the ratio of nurse assistants to patients it would make a world of difference.

If you are in the US consider purchasing long term care insurance for yourself and your parents. You can get a policy that provides some home health care to help the patient at home longer.