I disagree with Dilsaver's
Three Marks of Manhood 2nd ¶ of ch. 5, where he says that:
Whereas in order to fulfill his manly duty a man must often “act,” that is, conform himself to an external standard regardless of his feelings, a woman is most womanly when her acts flow from feelings of love. […] A young girl’s womanly gifts are already nestled in her heart and naturally spring forth if they are not opposed.
Men's acts should proceed from love, too.
Femininity, motherhood, and "womanly gifts" must be learned, too. She must "conform […] to an external standard [Our Blessed Virgin Mother] regardless of […] feelings" just like men must do the same to the "external standard" of Christ.
As Aristotle said, humans are born a "blank slate" (
tabula rasa), so fatherhood and motherhood, too, must be learned.