Jaynek, thank your comments.
There is a difference between deferring to a man in order to stay in our place as a woman and submitting to him as an authority over ourselves (as our husband, for example). We are not called to obey all men the same as we are our husbands, if that is what you are suggesting I said.
Just because I hypothetically could do something better than a man, such as debate an issue or build a swing set from scratch with power tools, does not mean it is my place to do so. Just because I could pass an entrance examination to be admitted to an engineering school or do something better than he does competitively does not mean I should do it. If I could argue better than some men, why would I want to or be in a position to do so?
Of course women will meet men who don’t use proper grammar, who swear and use blasphemy, who are blatantly effeminate, or who objectify women…men who are practically impossible to respect or even like. These men will be so patronizing that it’s ludicrous. Please note that I am not referring to station in life, education levels, or job situation of these men; I am talking about the way they conduct themselves and interact. I speak about men who have forfeited the respect and deference that they otherwise would receive as men, the same as women who dress provocatively, flirt, use vulgarity, or on the flip side wear pants and act like men, etc. make it clear that they aren’t expecting to be treated with respect. I would not “defer” or “submit” to a man who was dressed like a goth or a Satanist, for example. I’d run from such a person if I encountered him and I frequently have since I am in a position of using public transportation. I am actually afraid of some of the people (men and women) who try to talk to me just from looks alone…tattoos, piercings, weird makeup, fake blood, torn clothes, ripped fishnet stockings…how can we look charitably upon these people and yet must we? Sometimes I don’t even know if I’m dealing with a man or a woman. I try to pray for them but is it too late? Isn’t feminism an obvious factor in this morbid lifestyle of theirs which seems to be spreading to mainstream behavior and acceptance?
As far as being smarter than I, that would depend on how you define “smart.” I don’t evaluate people that way unless it comes right down to an appeal to their better judgment. The virtues that we strive to cultivate as Catholics is what I value in people and look for. Simply stated, I look for the good in people, and if I have to reject someone as dangerous and/or corrupt, it’s not because the person is too dumb (or not “smart”) but usually because feminist thinking has made them undesirable in some way. It’s best to surround oneself with those who share the same traditional Catholic faith. If we can’t, then we have to be on the alert. I admit this is stretching the point you wanted to make, but it’s a good place to say that men (and women) with whom I come into contact are not in competition with me over who is right and wrong, smarter or dumber, etc. Generally speaking, we have a reason for interacting with people in situations outside the home, most of which don’t call for deciding who is smarter.
On this forum, it has been suggested by some feminists that age of all things should discourage a woman from marrying an otherwise perfectly suitable, traditional Catholic man. Isn’t morality and living a life as godly men and women in our respective spheres enough for people?
As far as church teaching, I am not qualified to present that support. I was raised to behave like a female and to emulate the Blessed Mother. I don’t doubt for a minute that She would defer that sort of request to someone better qualified. And yes, I know that Her religious tradition was not Catholic, I’m just using that as an example. I will only say that men were deemed more suitable by Jesus Christ and the early founders of the Church to be the ones teaching. And yes, I know that it is said in the Bible (and additionally in some questionable sources) that women were part of this, but I reject the current modern tendency to add a feminist slant to early Christianity. Someone on this thread has already brought up “deaconesses” in reference to St. Paul. That says to me, female priests are going to be another feminist deviance justified by that poster. Why mention it otherwise?
These are difficult attitudes and behaviors to struggle with, but challenging feminism from both men and women is crucial because it is so detrimental to society but more importantly to our souls. I pray the rosary every day to help me remember my place as a woman and I include everyone collectively on this forum in my prayers for God’s graces even though some of them make my blood boil with their posts. Thanks to some of them, I was made aware that wearing a rosary is a gang symbol. Others have posted links in the library for reading about saints, including St. John of the Cross. I’m sorry that I even have an opportunity to challenge feminist attitudes on this forum but they are all over it.
Thank you for your interest in my comments, Jaynek, and God bless you. I don’t have the book learning of church teaching but I know that those who do (who have raised me) have not been in error in teaching me to look to the Blessed Mother as my role model. I view feminism as an attack on Her and hold no tolerance for it, as my previous posts have made clear. Even so, on a traditional Catholic forum I have more “critics” than “likers” because I point out these affronts to Her. I don’t see anyone else who is held in such low repute as that. Unless they’ve been banned, that is. Battling feminism in this society wears me out but I’ll keep on praying for strength.